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Well, the end...

Missingme's picture

has come.  Now the fear of an unknown future and the tears of personal failure (the things I could control, ie, pride, jealousy, worry) begins.

Wish me well, please?

MurphysLaw's picture

Don’t be scared! Be excited!!!

Don’t blame your yourself for a “failed” relationship, but look at the reasons WHY you accepted sooo much for sooo long.

Learn to love yourself! You deserve it!!!

Now go on out and buy yourself a new great color of lipstick & nail polish to match!!!

That always makes me feel better.

Missingme's picture

Yes, although this is killing me, I’m looking forward to but am kinda afraid of finding me, honestly.  

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Honey, I am right there with you.  I have come to the same conclusions and it isn't easy, at some ways exciting and also scarey but I cannot go on as I have been any longer.  I am an old lady and deserve a life of peacefulness around people that really care about me.

It's hard, let the tears flow....I have.

hereiam's picture

Yes, find yourself, again, and the person who is meant to be in your life will find you.

This guy is not it.

Siemprematahari's picture

The unknown is always scary but Missingme you got this!!! Take this time to reflect on you and what makes your soul feel alive again. You have lost yourself for so long.

Look at this as a new beginning to recreate yourself and live your best life darlin'. You deserve happiness and only you can do that. Wishing you well & I know you'll come out of this on the other side.

sandye21's picture

You are so brave - going into the unknown.  Wherever your journey takes you will be better than the one you left.  You've learned some lessons which will help you to follow the right fork in the road.  Good luck and (((HUGS)))

CANYOUHELP's picture

You are in the best shape ever, just takes a while to realize it with certainty. Look for a companion who does not live in his love coma.

And, everyday congratulate yourself for seeking a happier life!

somethingwicked's picture

Celebrate that you have not sacrificed yourself longer on this altar of Narcissism that your STBEX displayed time and again.

Now take the time to just be you and  focus on you .Maybe seek some help to reflect with a good counselor or grief therapist to help you move pass your sense of loss.

You are not alone in this.You are not strange or weird or broken or any label you are trying to affix to yourself because this relationship failed. You are a statistic.That is a fact. More often than not second marriage fail and if there are more than a spouse in the marriage it will fail faster.

You had a bunch of people ,the adult skids, in your marriage and in control of their father .And he was happy to be so enmeshed. He did not want a partner. He has his adult children and his guilt to snuggle up to.

Now go and be you best you and do not look back at this pain and allow this to define the rest of your life.You tried.You did your best .But  a partnership is impossible when one half refuses to meet in the middle and BE a partner.

Rags's picture

Rediscovering the person you enjoy being is amazing.  When my first marriage ended with my cavern crotched adulterous skank whore XW moving her pregnant ass out of our home and in with her geriatric fortune 500 executive sugar/baby daddy my life kicked off again and I have never looked back.

Enjoy kicking off your new life adventure. Enjoy you. Live happy, live well.  Those things are the best revenge and the best foundation for the rest of your life.

Take care of you.

Enjoy!

CLove's picture

Hugs for you through this painful time. The tears will come as you grieve for all the lost time, and lost hope, and lost emotions.

You will rebuild yourself into a new person and look back on this time, in time, with a renewed sense of accomplishment.

But first you must get through this.

Hugs!

sandye21's picture

Please take care of yourself and know that it was not a failure if it results in you treating yourself better.  Take time to regroup.  cry openly if you need to.  In a short while you will see that this was absolutely the best think you could have done  (((HUGS))).