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Opinion - would you want to celebrate your birthday with people who don't care?

stepmomsoon's picture

Submitted by stepmomsoon on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 7:40am

My birthday is coming up...

Since things are the way they are with the skids, I really don't want to celebrate any of it with them.. they don't care, so why would I want them around to do any celebrating?

They were jerks at my daughters bday.. it was a small family party and sk12 tried to ruin it by doing annoying shit after he was told not to and then tried to pick a fight with her because "it wasn't her birthday" because she asked him to please stop what he was doing because it was her birthday - uh, we celebrated it the day before since her bday fell on a Monday..

Then you have the whole not giving a shit when we put the cat to sleep a couple weeks ago - not one word of sympathy or anything.. didn't even acknowledge it when they have been around the cat for almost 4 years.. and they knew my daughter and I were devastated!

So the fact of the matter is.. they don't care. And quite frankly, I don't want them with me when I open gifts - they keep track and are so jealous.. not to mention they act like jerks and show no interest in anything if it's not about them.. they pretty much can't wait until I'm done so they can get on their ipods or watch tv.. it inconveniences them.

Maybe I am a bit sensitive.. but this whole "vibe" is just exhausting and I am sick of their little "I don't give a shit about you" message..

Comments

overworkedmom's picture

Submitted by overworkedmom on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 7:54am

^^^^ This is what I was going to say. Just make it adults only and maybe throw in a little something at home so DD can be apart of it too.

stepmomsoon's picture

Submitted by stepmomsoon on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 8:04am

Yea, hubby and I are going out this weekend for a nice dinner. (we don't have the kids)

My actual bday falls on a weekday, and all the kiddos will be here. I want to share it with my daughter, as she actually gets excited about it and shows love..

I really feel like just winging it.. like DH and my daughter and I start opening gifts and if the skids want to be there, they can.. but I'm not forcing them.

Lol.. and for dinner.. I was going to make a dish that I like and my daughter LOVES.. and that the skids don't care for..

Regarding cake and ice cream.. sure, this is probably being a bitch, but oh well.. the people that actually give a rats ass (DH, daughter and I) can go get ice cream somewhere.

I just feel like putting my foot down... I'm sick of this crap from them.. "It's gotta be all about them, all the time and if it isn't - they don't care" - time to give them a taste of their own medicine.

stepmomsoon's picture

Submitted by stepmomsoon on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 10:23am

Not an option.. we have THEM... all the time.. except every other weekend.

stormabruin's picture

Submitted by stormabruin on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 8:04am

My birthday is 3 days after SS's birthday. I've spent several of MY birthdays surrounded by the skids, their friends, BM, & her family, & in the 12 years I've been with my DH, not ONE time have I EVER received a "happy birthday" from any one of them.

My DH has always made a point to do something for me, but my birthday has always been overshadowed & lost in celebrating SS's. My gifts have always been put off (admittedly at my suggestion) to allow room in our finances for his gifts first.

Even when they stopped coming to see us, the possibility that they "might" required we have gifts "just in case" they decided they wanted to.

I'd rather spend my birthdays alone with my dogs than spend it in the shadows of people who expect us to be gracious to them for taking the time to grace us with their mugs. I don't care if I never receive a gift from them. I don't even need a "happy birthday". If they can't handle just being in our company without having to be the stars of the show on my birthday, I don't want them anywhere near me.

Mercury's picture

Submitted by Mercury on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 9:16am

Geez, that is awful. Twelve years? Give yourself a very special gift...of solitude, or with girl friends, or spoil yourself rotten with a spa visit. Anything other than hanging out with people that rude.

DaizyDuke's picture

Submitted by DaizyDuke on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 8:19am

My Birthday is Sunday and you better damn well believe that skids will not be involved in anything that I do. DH are planning on going out to dinner and possibly some shopping tomorrow and then I am taking BS3 to see Frozen on Sunday. Of course I can't say this to DH, but I sincerely hope that neither skid is around all weekend, it would make my B-day awesome!

Now a couple of years ago, DH threw a big surprise B-day bash for me and skids were at that, but it was OK...there were enough people there that I could just ignore them and they didn't even know 1/4 of the people there, so they just ended up wandering around the restaurant looking like lurches... whatever.

P.S. Happy B-day fellow December baby! Wink

stepmomsoon's picture

Submitted by stepmomsoon on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 10:34am

Thanks! (it's rough being a close to xmas baby, isn't it?)

Oh, and you will LOVE "Frozen".. saw it thanksgiving weekend and LOVED it Smile

TickedOff's picture

Submitted by TickedOff on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 8:45am

We care hun. Enjoy that dinner and don't even let them be a thought in your mind. that night is all about you. And let us know so we can give you some birthday love on steptalk.

Mercury's picture

Submitted by Mercury on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 9:20am

I made it clear to DH that I will NEVER spend my b-day with his kids. If my day happens to fall on a kid day, make other plans for them. Send them to his parents, tell the B*%#& that you can't take them that day. That would be the biggest gift he could ever give me. So far it hasn't been an issue, but next year (in Sept) it will be. I have given him enough time to plan I think. Blum 3

stepmomsoon's picture

Submitted by stepmomsoon on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 11:52am

Unfortunately we are stuck with them on my bday.. Can't get out of that.

I'm just not playing the game anymore.. I know how they feel about me and the last thing I want is it in my face at a time when I am supposed to be celebrating and being happy.