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Come to Jesus talk

over step's picture

Had a brutally honest talk with H last night. Pretty much told him that if we loved each other as much as we say we do that we will do whatever it takes to fix this or our marriage isn't going to work and after Sunday it was on a downward spiral. I told him that I need him to make me feel like my feelings are important to him. And if puke(sd15) does something that affects me and I just can't overlook it, he'll handle it to make it better for me. He agreed he would and apologized many times.

This is the last talk we will have about this. I'm done talking about it. If he doesn't follow through, I will handle these situations with puke myself and he can deal with her backlash.

Comments

over step's picture

Yeah. Not looking for perfect. Just looking for honest effort. I know I will have to guide him a bit. I'm okay with that.

over step's picture

Oh, that's my plan. No more complaints from me about the bathroom. No change? I trash the shit. No effort? He gets put in time out from me. He's been given his final warning.

another step's picture

I got FH to read it - theoretically. I have no idea what he actually read but somehow he came out believing only that "other stepmothers have it worse than me since his kids do not cut my clothing up or physically attack me" and that he is better off continuing to kiss BM's ass rather than "rock the boat."

Either he was lying about reading it or found 5 sentences that supported his views and clung to them like a life preserver. But it was not helpful in any way unfortunately.

another step's picture

Totally right on both counts. His family crest should be an ostrich with its head in the sand.