You are here

336 Hours and a vent about life

nengooseus's picture

In DH's CO, he and BM are allowed 2, 2 weeks periods with the skids each summer, and dates must be provided by 5/15. DH provided his on 5/12 and BM did hers that same day. Yesterday, we got an e-mail from her informing DH that the period he requested (6/19-7/3) was greater than 14 days and that here therefore had to drop the skids off to her on 7/3 at 9 AM and she would return them to us at 6 PM that evening for DH's scheduled 7/4 holiday (which starts the night before).

Apparently, in BM land, 14 days means exactly 336 hours, and not a moment longer for DH.

So DH went back to her and said that if she wants to interpret 14 days as 336 hours, that was fine, but she would get the skids on 6/19 from 9 AM to 6 PM. Oh, and she would need to drop the skids off for a series of random dates surrounding her 2 vacations periods, too. He even provided her with the dates.

She's being ridiculous, but this is the ridiculousness that we have to deal with every.single.day and it's exhausting.

And I'm stressed to the max besides which:

  • Work stinks. We're having a lot of change, layoffs are looming, I don't have the tools I need to do my job, so I feel like I'm banging my head into a wall constantly.
  • It's the end of school, and my DD(11) is a mess. She's over this year, but she still has a week left, so her attitude SUCKS. And her dad is p*ssing her off, too, and of course I have to deal with that, too.
  • The skids are coming for 2 weeks in just over 2 weeks--in addition to their regular EOWE next weekend. The whole f*ing month of June will be nothing but skids all the time.
  • DH's job is in the midst of change, as well, which has him stressed to the max, so he's doing a horrible job of helping me take care of me.
  • And to ice the poop cake we're dealing with, we found out that our 2 year old pup has untreatable cancer and will die within a month. When the skids are with us, most likely. So instead of going through this sh*t together with DH and DD, I have to deal with their inevitable f*ing production about a dog they don't give a rip about.

    Is it 5 o'clock yet?

  • Comments

    tankh21's picture

    It's always 5 o'clock somewhere LOL. I am sorry you are going through this. I totally understand how you feel I really think our DH's know what we deal with. The whole month of June will be nothing but skids for me as well. Tomorrow is my birthday and my 1st wedding anniversary and my DH has to pick up the skids tomorrow joy, joy!

    Acratopotes's picture

    nengoos - yes it's 5 o clock...... passing you some russian vodka...

    I get the dog thing and the skids, what I'm about to say may sound cold, but the cancer can not be cured, why not simply help the pup to heaven now.... deal with it before the kids arrive....

    send BM a gold start for calculating the hours correctly...

    Acratopotes's picture

    they will have to eventually to spare the dog some major un comfort and pain

    I think it's more of an you have a month to say goodbye to your four legged kid.... before he will suffer and call it an ending...

    I got 6 months left with mine before she would suffer without her normal meds... she went peacefully in her sleep after 3 weeks...

    tankh21's picture

    BM is just being petty and vindictive it sounds like to me. Is BM coming to pick up the skids between those times?

    Hennypenny's picture

    She is mad because you are extending the 14-day period to 16 days by having your period end right before the holiday. And while that makes total sense to do it that way, and she may just be controlling and vindictive as you indicated. But I can also see that she wouldn't want to go 16 days without seeing her kids, hence the presumed pettiness over the extra hours on the 13th- giving up those few extra hours means she doesn't see her kids for two more days.

    The logical response is to say "hey, that's a really long time to not see the kids, can we do a visit some time in that period?" And that should work both ways. In your situation it's just not possible to have that dialogue, which sucks. And I know it's hard to have empathy for someone who shows zero in response- trust me, I know! But wanted to throw this out as another perspective, that if your plans allow them maybe it is the right thing to do to give her the time on the 13th- after all, by this time the kids will be missing their mom too.

    tankh21's picture

    My DH was in a similar situation. He was pissed off because the weekend of July 22nd BM will be going to Mexico and taking the skids with her however, according to the CO that is one of DH's weekends and I told him that since she gave him 3 extra days during Spring Break in March when it was her time that it was not fair to BM for him to make a fuss about that weekend that she is taking the skids to Mexico. Of course I got accused of me not wanting his kids around but, I thought that it was fair since BM give up some of her time so that the skids could spend it with dad and their grandma that he could give her those days so she could go on her Mexico trip and have fun with her kids.

    Salems Lot's picture

    Sorry about your furbaby.

    As for your BM, Ours used do the same thing regarding holidays and visitation. God forbid if he requested an extra day or an extra few hours that fell between Holiday time and EOWE.
    BUT if he didn't request extra the time, she expected him to cancel any plans he made and take them if she asked.