I love DH but sometimes I wish I could just walk away and it would be me and BD. Then I'd only have to worry about us. I wouldn't have to start each day with dread, wondering how SD7 is going to treat me that day. I wouldn't have to wonder how DH is going to let me down next, whether it's always being at work or not standing up to SD. I know DH is trying hard to improve our marriage, but some days it feels like so much has already happened I can't let go of those issues. He's well aware of the situation, but then I feel bad having to tell him there's nothing he can do to fix it but give me time to deal with these things. I find I'm missing the days of being on my own. I love my little girl to pieces and I definitely want her with me. It's getting so hard worrying about what everyone else is doing. Some days I feel like I hardly know myself anymore.