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Some kind of fairy broke into our house...

mama_althea's picture

...according to FDH.

Because someone wrote all over SD's bedroom furniture in marker (again). He concurs that the places in which her entire first and last name are written were probably done by her. But someone else must have done the rest because there are full, complete sentences and she wouldn't have done that. According to SD, they were going to let her skip second grade, but I guess she's still not capable of writing a sentence. The handwriting doesn't match? Well, let's bring in the forensic experts then, FDH.

Other suspects:
Me
Him
My DS11 (who sadly has completely illegible writing)
SS16 (because 16 year old boys are known to write on furniture with their most flowery writing in the prettiest marker colors, especially when their writing is as illegible as DS11 AND when to date they've only exhibited writing in text-speak and/or gangsta)
My DD16 (who currently is on a completely different continent)
Our pets (who haven't thus far shown any aptitude for furniture writing)

I always sound like a bitch for harping about the furniture/wall writing. Like I'm fixating on this small transgression. But it's the fact that in the past he has never said anything to her about it. And now this time he's even trying to blame it on someone else. And worse, to me, is that SD is so completely disrespectful of this home. The marker-ing is a small symptom of the overall picture.

(thinking back I didn't need to so heatedly ask him, "well who the fuck did it then?", because to him it just made me sound mean. oops.)

Comments

Peaches1973's picture

Yeah,stop being so mean you mean old meanie.Dont you know that SD is incapable of bad behavior?
Im sure he will to find a way to blame it on the pets.
I feel your pain.Skids are never to blame.

Gabriels Mom's picture

LMAO!

"well who the fuck did it then?"<<~~~That would have been my response

SS likes to write on himself it's an annoyance but I assume a phase and it washes off. I used to let my bestfriend draw detailed "tattoos" on my arms with a black pen in study hall so it goes away.

My BS3 likes to write on stuff. I fixed his little butt I got the color wonder markers and all of SS's writing stuff is kept in a box on a shelf in his room so BS3 can't reach it.

I would take all of her markers and crayons and replace it with the color wonder stuff. It only writes on the special paper. It's awesome!

mama_althea's picture

Your BS is 3. SD is 8. 8!

Like I said, it's not so much the objects she wrote on...it's the fact that she did, disrespects the belongings in this house, and he denies she did it.

But yeah, if she's going to do something a toddler would do, maybe she should only have toddler craft supplies, like color wonder markers.

mama_althea's picture

Oh trust me, it will not be me cleaning it up. I wouldn't even have entered her room except the TV was so loud. Normally I'm quite disengaged.

oneoffour's picture

Oh geez! Perish the thought that a child from his loins would self decorate with markers all over the furniture! Yup, must be the cat then.

I would get very close to her ear and say something like "I know you wrote all over the furniture in marker. Daddy may not think so but I KNOW!"

mama_althea's picture

Couple months ago, in the most matter-of-fact, tone-free manner I could muster up, I did ask her to please not write on the walls or furniture. She turned all red, ran and hid in her room. I noticed a few days later she had covered that markering with stickers (like that's better). That was one of maybe 4 times I have ever called her out on anything, and I even said 'please'!

PeanutandSons's picture

That damn fairy is constantly breaking into my house too!

She shits in my toilet, doesn't wipe her little fairy ass and then leaves the evidence sitting in the bowl for my poor innocent skids to take the blame.

I am thinking about setting out some traps....

hereiam's picture

I thought everybody's pets wrote on the furniture when left alone. No? I must have been misinformed.

mama_althea's picture

Oh, and while I was getting all heated up and shitty about it, I offered up the theory to him that whoever did it wrote her first and last name over and over again just to make it LOOK like she did it.

PeanutandSons's picture

My asshole sister actually did that when we were kids. She had scratched her name into all her furniture with a tack. And after she did it she realized that mom would know exactly who did it and shed be in trouble. So she scratched my name all over the furniture too.

We both got spanked cause my mom didn't believe that I had nothing to do with it.

mama_althea's picture

That sucks!

I don't think the pets, who currently look like the most likely suspects, are that vindictive. But some of them are cats, so you never know...

RedWingsFan's picture

WOW! LMFAO - some of the responses here are awesome.

And yes, I would've definitely been the mean one and said "Who the fuck did it then?" as well.

My cat is pretty damn talented AND has "thumbs" (he's a polydactyl) but I'd pay some serious cash to watch him write!!!!!!!!!

mama_althea's picture

I haven't gotten any votes for my DD yet. She could have flown across the Atlantic, framed SD, and flown back. With the 8 hour time difference, it could be done.

Or maybe it was me! Maybe I like for my home to be disrespected...I mean I let myself get disrespected by the things SD says...maybe I wanted physical proof.

Or my son...maybe he's FAKING the bad handwriting just to throw off his teachers and get scolded by them.

Or SS...he wanted to give his thug persona a break and let out his inner little girl...

Or wait...FDH! Yes! He wanted to find a way to PROVE I just "hate his daughter". Yes, that must be it! I framed her to make myself look bad.

StickAFork's picture

:jawdrop:

She's doesn't get to have markers, then. That's ridiculous that she's coloring all over everything.

Now, I'd just leave it. No matter what she does. I've found that kids who are forced to live in their own chaos stop destroying everything.

Now, my DS17 puts stickers on his furniture (like surf/skate stickers) and that's his way of "personalizing" it. I didn't care so much, until I just bought him a new dresser and forgot to say "no personalizing." Sigh. Hope he still likes them when he heads to college. Smile

Bojangles's picture

I know it must be really annoying, but your suspects breakdown and analysis of the evidence is hilarious so thankyou for the laugh! My BD5 has a bit of track record writing her name on her bedroom wall but at least she uses pencil and at least DH doesn't feel the need to defend her against my wrath, but then that's the difference between parenting your own children and dancing around someone elses.

mama_althea's picture

Oh well, yeah, my own kids have done all kinds of things like this. Not usually the same thing over and over, but similar things. And younger than the age of 8 (except the skate stickers and stuff).

But I didn't DENY it.

And the wrath he needs to defend her from is pretty meek.

The last thing you said is what almost all of our situations boil down to: the difference between parenting your own children and dancing around someone else's. Perfectly said.

Annanymous's picture

:sick:

Boy you are nice. Seriously. I would have rampaged at the kid AND at DH with that dumbass "someone else did it" crap. The kid is 8??? NOT 3!!!

My DH used to pull that shit too, when DSD was younger, he believed every damn lie out of her mouth even when the proof was right in front of him... "Someone else ate the entire box of donuts"..."someone else looked up "girl sex" on Utube"..."someone else smashed bananas and hid them behind DSD's bed".... WHO DH, cause it had to be YOU? ME? or THE DOG? OR are you saying we have been burglarized and they stole only the donuts out of the box, but not the box or anything else? Well, FFS call the cops!

"well who the fuck did it then?" <-- that would have been the nicest thing out of my mouth. DH and DSD would be cleaning it and DSD would have absolutely no markers, coloring crayons, pens, pencils, or any such writing devices available to her. She would have to sit at the kitchen table to use crayons that I let her use and immediately put back up on top of the refrigerator. All markers would be permanently banned from her.

I would probably also yell at her tell her she will not dare disrespect my house and god help her if she did it again.

I am pretty mean though. }:)

I'm mad over your walls just relating it to crap my DSD did and DH believed her when she said "I didn't do it". :sick:

BSgoinon's picture

I always found it funny when kids write THEIR OWN NAMES on walls and furniture. My exh has a cousin who is smart as they come. When she was about 3 she started writing HER BROTHERS name on everything. Walls, furniture, in books everywhere. Poor little Johnny (that was really his name) was getting his little butt whooped on a regular basis, while little Jenny was in the other room, writing his name on something else.