We all went down to see SS13 this weekend (SO, FIL and myself). I was incredibly nervous about it and expected everything under the sun to go wrong. I was pleasantly surprised. SS looks good, healthy, and clean. BM gave us absolutely no problems, no run around. She actually gave us her address so that we could go pick up SS. She was nice to me, I was shocked. She talked to me about what is going on in SS life, about his new school (which sounds awesome) his grades, his dental health. She seems to be doing good, working a legitimate job and taking care of SS needs. She has an appointment set up to get him braces and seem to be trying really hard. I am floored. From how things have been going these past few months this is not what I expected.

SS and SO interacted wonderfully, and SS was NICE TO ME! SS didn’t have an attitude with me at all, we talked he told me about his girlfriend, told me about his school, his plans and there was no sense of snakriness or sarcasm from him. Of course there were a few red flags, but I kept them to myself. BM looks like crap, every time I have ever seen her she looks fairly good. This time not so much, dirty clothes, dirty hair no makeup (strange for her). While talking to SS he mentioned that some bills hadn’t been paid, but was very defensive of his mother. (We didn’t say anything negative, SS’s comment about the bills was immediately followed with him saying “but its okay”). He bragged about his mother quite a bit which was odd to me. BM also made an effort to talk directly to me instead of to SO, again to me that was odd but she wasn’t rude or anything like that.

SO and FIL immediately said upon us leaving that she is up to something, that she is sleeping with her boss and that we need to stay on guard. They have years of dealing with this woman, so I have to trust them on that. I would like to think that she is trying to clean up her life and is adapting to being a responsible human being, SO thinks she is up to something. FIL thinks that SS wants to come home and that is why she is playing nicey-nice. Who knows?

Following the trip SS got his phone back on and his been texting SO. They have set up a solid date for visitation through BM, so within the month SS will be back in my house, at least for a few days. I am excited, I keep telling myself not to be. This could all still end very badly. I just need to be friendly but not let myself get emotionally attached to this kid just yet. When FIL brought up the theory that SS wants to move back home, I was surprised by SO’s response. SO stated that if SS wants to move back home simply because he wants to, no signs of abuse or neglect, then it wouldn’t fly. SO wants him to finish out the school year, then he can come home over the summer on a trial basis. If SS can stick to the rules then he can stay. I doubt he will want to though, he is doing good where he is at, he has fancy electronic toys and basically gets to do as we wants. Only time will tell.

I just have to keep in the back of my mind the memory of all the things that have gone wrong. I understand that mistakes were made on all parts, and that things could completely turn around BUT I want to keep myself from repeating those same mistakes. I do not want this to turn into another nightmare. The selfish part of me doesn’t really want SS to move back home. I enjoy my clean house, the peace and quiet, and I don’t want to invite that crazy level of stress back into my life. But if he does come back home I think I will be more prepared this time around.