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My SD opted for no contact with BM today

EvilDiva's picture

First, HAPPY MOTHERS DAY/STEPMOM'S DAY/STEPMOM VACATION DAY to everyone!!!

I am still in bed with DH, BD10 and SD14 making me breakfast. So sweet.

SD14 decided she didn't want to go see her BM which thrilled us. The less interaction with the crazy one, the better. Here is the only problem though...as a mom I feel a little guilty. SD14 has truly just latched on to me, wants to please me, wants to be just like me. And while I am flattered and thankful she is at least trying to emulate a positive role model, the mom in me is very saddened that her BM is so ughhhhh.

Yesterday, SD14 and I spent our weekly "alone" time cleaning my MIL's house as she was sick and FIL is out of town visiting his 94 yr old mom. The house was a sty. I love my DH but prior to me he lived in squalor and now I know where he got it from.

Believe it or not, SD and I had a fairly decent time. She is no housekeeper, but she sure tries to give me her all. After cleaning we went to HPB, our favorite hangout as a family. That was followed up by ice cream and then home.

It was okay. She sometimes still says the dingiest things on the planet, but there were a few times yesterday when I actually genuinely laughed out loud.

DH thinks she wants to bond with me. I am not holding my breathe. I have a feeling she is lying to me about something (different subject) and I'm just waiting until she thinks she has me suckered to get to the bottom of that.

Alas, I am going to grab a non-hurried shower and prepare for my breakfast in bed.

HAVE A GREATTTTTT DAY, LADIES, BECAUSE WE DO SO DESERVE IT.

EVILDIVA
formerly angeliabb

Comments

Nymh's picture

Our parenting plan states that the child must be with the mother on Mother's Day and the father on Father's Day. But even if that wasn't the case, I know BF would at least make SS call his Mom to say Happy Mother's Day.

It's ultimately your decision as a family how you handle this. But SD is a child, and you guys are the parents.

I hope you enjoy your breakfast in bed! I don't think BF is even going to do anything special for me today, and it's my first real Mother's Day Sad

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

EvilDiva's picture

about the decree as ours says the same thing. DH is relying on fact that BM hasn't attempted contact with SD since last November when we dropped her off and found out 2 days later BM went to a bar and didn't come back and that her 16 yr old sister took her to her BF's house where they began to have sex on couch next to SD14. So as an attorney I don't think we are outside of our right to keep her away, but as a mom, my heart is so torn.

I did tell DH this is your call. He said, "Babe, I have enjoyed the peace and quiet and there is no way we are opening up that can of crazy." I just shook my head.

This is his road, and I told him...we sleep in the bed we make.

I am sorry BF isn't doing anything special for you, but sometimes we have to teach our wonderful SO's how we want to be treated. Just tell him, I feel like a mom when I am stepmama'ing your child(ren); so I deserve to be honored today too....how about a massage? Blum 3

Even if you don't get that massage, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY from me to you!

EvilDiva

Nymh's picture

You're an attorney? How cool! That was always one of the things that I wanted to do with my life. I just can't decide out of the dozens of things that I've "always wanted to do" which one is right for me, so I am wasting a lot of time doing things I DON'T want to do with my life in my indecision.

I am a mommy, that's what gets me the most. I had our first baby in September and as my first Mother's Day I wish he would do something special for me Sad Maybe I will mention it to him.

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

EvilDiva's picture

Go tell your BF he better get it in gear....you're a new mommy too!!!!!

My DH never bought me flowers and I complained, I really like flowers. He didn't catch a clue. So I signed up for an expensive weekly flower service that cost sooooo much money. After 2 weeks and seeing the bill I left on the countertop, he says, "Hey I'm the flower bearer around here...problem solved!

We have to teach people how to treat us sometimes.

ok, six minutes till breakfast gotta hustle to make that shower