Ever so often I just feel like I need to unload my thoughts and feelings and now is one of those times. I’m sorry if this turns out to be very random.

Thanksgiving dinner at MIL’s is Saturday and I’m dreading it. Dinner at DH grandparents is on Thanksgiving day with MIL and the “aunt” that hit on my DH, along with other aunts, uncles and cousins. I will just ignore MIL and the “aunt” the best I can, speak only when spoken to.

SS7’s birthday party was this past Saturday at MIL’s because I was not putting in the work or money for an ungrateful child. Before we leave to go, SS7 of course starts acting up and not listening to DH when he was telling him to get ready to go to his own party. SS7 says, “I hate my birthday and don’t care!” Perfect example of why I quit doing anything. DH had to take a breather outside alone before we could leave.

DH had asked MIL to just pick up the cake and pizza and we’d bring the rest. We arrive and the kitchen is fully decorated with cups, plates, noise makers, etc. I was annoyed because she knew we were buying those things, but did it anyway. If she wanted to do that, great, but she could have told us so we could have not wasted the money!

During the party she made some snarky comments that only I caught, which I know was her intention. She implied that SHE never makes fun of people, but I do and that my future SIL is wonderful and can be counted on for anything, unlike me. Yet future SIL treated BIL like crap and disrespected him over her ex-boyfriend for the first couple of years of their relationship, but she’s wonderful. BM cheated on DH and is a terrible mother to SS7, but BM and MIL are friends. And MIL is very close to her niece whom is “wonderful”, and this niece just began a relationship with her “ex” best friend’s boyfriend.

Yet all of these women are wonderful to MIL and her family, but because I don’t have a good relationship with my horribly behaving SS and don’t “love him like my own”, I’m a terrible person to be shunned and treated terribly by MIL and her family. I just don’t understand. I’ve been good to DH the entire time we’ve been together, never even considered cheating, and helped him with SS and how to parent better for his and SS’s benefit, done nothing but try to be a positive influence in SS’s life and treat him like I would any other child, but yet here I am, being labeled the horrible person because I’m honest by saying I don’t love SS like my own.

I get so tired of people saying that if you marry someone with kids you have to love them like your own, and it aggravates me even more some of these step parents agree to it! I know most of this takes place on “Fakebook” and people have to try and look good on there, but I know that if these step parents were honest, they would not agree. They may very well love their step children, but it is not the same as your own child. Guess I just made the mistake of being honest, but I’m not good at being fake.

Thank you if you read this, I don’t really have a question, just needed to vent a bit. Unless you have advice on how to not give a crap about what other people/family think, including meddling two faced MIL’s that your DH is close with, yet won’t stand up to?? Acra, you seem to be good with that kind of advice!