DH and I have been blowing up all day about SD. You know that feeling when you know that someone isn't telling you something? I've been waiting to find out what it is with DH.
DH never went to the courts for custody of SD. He sat in the parking lot for 2 hours, but couldn't go in. I asked him why not.
"What's the point of going for custody of a kid that isn't mine? I haven't raised her, she's not mine biologically... I'm just the sap that signed the birth certificate because it was 'the right thing to do'! I don't even WANT her anymore. She looks, acts, sounds just like HIM!"
I asked what he meant. BM left him for another guy when she was 6 weeks pregnant. DH knew she had cheated on him. She insisted she had gotten pregnant on vacation with DH... until SD was born. Then she said that she KNEW SD had been conceived in Michigan. Apparently, even though I've always just thought SD just looked 100% like BM... she doesn't. She looks like the other guy. She acts like him. She apparently even sounds like him. He took off the day before she was born and hasn't had anything to do with her, so these little things aren't picked up.
DH says they are genetic. Like the little things that bug my mother about me because they are just like my father (who took off when I was 22 months old). He says he's tried his hardest to love her anyway... but once BD2 was born, it got harder. Once NBD was born... he says he can't stand that BM's kid comes into our lives and takes his time away from his biological daughters. He says he's angry that any time they want they could start taking his money away from his kids too. He says he'll gladly take a paternity test... SD isn't his.

What do we do? He signed the affidavit of parentage. It says that he waived his rights to a paternity test... but BM signed it too and she must have known that he wasn't the father... and she didn't admit she cheated on him... It says that they are signing under penalty of perjury..