Sherrylyn's picture

Mothers Day was so nice

Both of my stepsons, 19 & 16, made such an effort for me. One picked up some of my favorite food before he headed into work, and the other came home after work with roses for me.

My husband has had full custody of the boys for 14 years and I've been around for 13 of those years, married for 10.

lovin-life's picture

This is interesting..

So you want to be a stepmother?

Excerpted from Games Divorced People Play, by Dr. Melvyn A. Berke and Joanne B. Grant.

"Surveys and research suggest the following:

"If the new parent is a stepmother, the probability of the marriage surviving and marital happiness are reduced.

SympatheticBioDad's picture

Happy Mothers Day!

Happy Mothers Day everyone!

I hope all of the stepchildren out there understand and appreciate all the hard work their stepparents do for them.

-S

Sherrylyn's picture

I don't get it

For the past 13 years both my husband and his ex have left the majority of the chlld rearing of their boys to me. I have been consistant in all of the rewards and punishments, what went for the older son would stand for the younger son.

Sweetie's picture

Crazed Days

Hi All,
Well, I've experienced a series of crazed days. My stepson came last Thursday to visit and his girlfriend came on Friday to join him. He stayed Thursday thru Sunday and she stayed thru Saturday night. Needless to say, I had my hands full. I had only met the girl once before for about 40 minutes total, but the ex-wife, was quite kind enough to tell her enough nasty stuff to give her a real earful. She apparently was a real "silver spoon" baby which completely drove both my husband and I crazy all weekend. She never once bothered to offer to help with anything and constantly spoke in babytalk. It was unnerving to not be able to say anything at all. My stepson is growing up in some ways, yet in others, he has a long way to go. I think that in this case, he has a case of the raging hormones, or let's just say, he can't keep his zipper shut. There really isn't anything special to write home about this girl but it was the only real relationship he had from high school that he has hung on to and both my husband and I think that it would be best if he just let it go and moved on. He is wasting good opportunities having himself tied to this girl and neither of us, think for a minute that she is pining away for him at her dorm for him at the art school in Savannah. But while my stepson was here this time, he was constantly asking how much some of our things cost, like how much our house was, how much our greyhound puppy cost, etc. And then, probably goes back and tells his Mom as well. But it has always been like that. We are pretty careful to sidestep these issues but honestly at his age, he shouldn't be asking them as they are really rude questions. Another thing that happened that really bothered me is that we had just purchased brand new living room furniture that I had custom ordered and they had taken off the pillows and were laying on them and playing with them on the floor. I was pretty well fit to be tied. I've only had the furniture for 2 months, it is the nicest stuff I've ever had, and I'll probably never get anything like it again. It was a struggle to get it, and I had just told them the story about all the trouble I had because the pattern and style had been discontiued so I couldn't believe that they would be so thoughtless to take the new cushions and lay on them. Mind you, these are young adults, 20 and 21 years of age! Not babies!

happy mom's picture

What's with the constant switching of schedule!

I can't stand the biomom! She always wants to switch weekends and/or days that we have him. I don't understand why she does this all the time, does she do this to irritate us or break the cycle of letting us see my stepson? The schedule is so not steady.

queen_bethy's picture

Finally...

My husband and I had a really great talk last night and I think he finally sees things clearly now. It's been really hard getting him to see the big picture with regards to his son. He refused to even consider the fact that his son was one way with me and my kids and another way entirely when he was around. Not to mention finally getting him to see how jealous, bitter and resentful he is thanks to his mother.

lovin-life's picture

It ain't no Brady Bunch.....is it?!!

I'm told once again. That's just the way she is..that's why she has no friends. Don't take it personally!

The 30 yr old called tonight "Is my Dad there?" No, he's not. He's at work. "OK I'll call him there." OK ""Bye" I never asked how she was, or how the new baby is. I'm so tired of trying. And of course she had nothing to say to me as usual.

SMIT's picture

Did you have to deal with the ex-wife being at your wedding reception?

Hi:

Is there anybody out there who was faced with the ex-wife picking up a little kid from your wedding reception?

Until about six weeks ago, I was with the idea of the ex- picking up my little SS at our wedding reception (which will be next Saturday!). Then she really p*ssed me off with a couple of comments and I haven't wanted her anywhere near us that day since. We have the option of someone taking the little guy home to his mommy from our reception early, but there's a possiblity that she might come pick him up outside the hall. I DREAD the scenario of my finace having to listen for his cell phone, talking to her, having to interrupt something with our guests, having to see HER on OUR wedding day, and her turning it into a 15 minute visit.

SMIT's picture

She thinks Daddy should reward him for not so good behavior...

I can't believe my SS's mommy told my fiance that he should reward their little boy for less than good behavior! I just have to share this one...

At SS's daycare, they have a color card system to show who has behaved any given day and who hasn't. SS has recently had trouble getting the best behavior color. (He's almost 4 and really exerting independence and arguing "skills.") A few days ago, as an incentive, my finace told him that if he stayed on the best color for two days straight, he'd get a little gift. Well, the dear boy didn't make it and he sobbed to his mommy that he wouldn't getting a present from Daddy because he didn't listen. Last night, the little guy called to tell us he had gotten a good card and we cheered for him. Smiling My fiance reminded him that he had to do the same today to get a surprise. Ex-wife then later told my fiance, "You have to give it to him. He cried so hard!"