olderone's picture

seeking advice

I am married to a women who was never married, no children..was a business owner and boss..my kids at the time were in their 20's and now mid to late thirties...we have a great relationship other then my kids! she keeps telling me all the things, and how, they should do...how should I address the issue that the kids are adults, they do not reflect on her, or me at this point ...any advice is appreciated, thanks

janeyc's picture

I agree with you totally, I

I agree with you totally, I think a lot of step parents forget that, its your home too!

sandye21's picture

I agree that DH and SM have

I agree that DH and SM have no say what Adult skids do with their own life - unless the adult skids are in DH's & SM's house - or if the adult skids are treating either DH or SM disrespectfully. When my SD would come over with her hubby they brought their dogs who DID trash our house, chewed up my favorite shoes and an expensive arch support. It would have been nice if SD had offered to at least pay part of the cost of replacing the arch support. At the time I was under the misconception I should just let it go to keep the peace, and DH didn't do anything either. They also acted as if they were entitiled to be waited on, not lifting a finger to clean up after themselves, and we were expected to pay for everything. If that happened today, I would not stay silent.

sandye21's picture

If she is complaining about

If she is complaining about your kids, there is a reason for it. They are adults so you can not really tell them what to do but you can inform them you expect them to respect her as your wife. I can guarantee you, if you treat the marriage as it is first priority she will stop complaining.

stepmomfromhell's picture

One thing many but not all,

One thing many but not all, is that we don't like our DH going off seeing their kids from their past relationship(s). They are not part of your present relationship with your DW, and therefore they should be forgotten about.

Just tell her if she keeps reminding you of them you will never forget them and might end up visiting them and their children, which most likely she will disapprove of. I'm sure once you tell her this, she will shut her trap forever and start to enjoy life.

Poodle's picture

Absolutely. this poster may

Absolutely. this poster may have many motives but one of them could well be to try to genuinely help whatever his situation is. I for one would really like to hear what he has to say and the suggestion that he should forget about his children is utterly disgraceful.

It's nothing personal.

car.is.annoyed's picture

I agree Augusta; maybe

I agree Augusta; maybe stepmumfromhell mistyped something, because I cannot believe what I read. As much as I want to disengage myself from my DH's grown children, I have always been the one who encouraged him to call them more, see them more, etc.; of course, I got the blame for why he didn't anyhow, but to require anyone to forget about their children, grown or not, is ridiculous!


not2sureimsaneanymore's picture

She is the proverbial black

She is the proverbial black sheep that we really try to ignore. She's a few peanuts short of a circus.

Disneyfan's picture

A few??? The whole damn bag

A few??? The whole damn bag is empty!

"Some of you nonstepparents should have disclaimers in your signature lines. Disney isn't a SM any more, but her's could read, "Was a SM. That shit is for the birds! I don't hate all SMs, though. I'm cool."" LadyFace

stormabruin's picture

No, she didn't mistype

No, she didn't mistype anything. She sprinkles this BS across many blogs.

Given her family relationships, I can't help but believe she's wandered out of a holler somewhere & just happened upon internet access & is posting this backwoods drivel.

I have to believe that's where she hooked up with this DH 30 years her senior, who clearly hasn't a backbone, or even a vertebra in his body. Perhaps he depends on her to spoon-feed him or something & the only way she'll help him is if he disowns his first family.

She seems to truly believe that he'll ever just forget them, not love them, not want them, not miss them...he'll only love her & the family he has with her from now until forever.

She's a....nevermind. No namecalling.

"Women are angels & when someone breaks our wings we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick. We are flexible like that."

Bio father's picture

What a bitch you are

What a bitch you are stepmomfromhell, I'm tired of your dumb ass, how the fuck does his kids not have anything to do with his present life. I don't mean to talk this but damn.

Bio dad and proud of it

Bio father's picture

I know I should but she's

I know I should but she's crazy.

Bio dad and proud of it

Poodle's picture

I have a hunch it's a male,

I have a hunch it's a male, either a disgruntled embittered husband or a couple of teens. The pity is that newcomers to the site could take it seriously, but I think it should be appreciated for spoof value. It always helps me to lighten up, so thanks SMFH.

It's nothing personal.