So you injured yourself at work, they examined it at a work clinic and told you to stay off your ankle but work won't give you time off?

You have choices when it comes to MIL. Tell her what you can and cannot do. Say it. Mean it. Simple as that although I do know that these situations are rarely simple. Regardless, many times it is us or them. That is your choice.

Your MIL has cancer but smokes?

Your MIL can make a request but she cannot make demands. Stop catering to her (easier said than done, I know), she does not not run your household. If she doesn't want to talk about it over the phone, she will have to wait until it is convenient for you and your husband.

Totally agree. I'm having a hard time from your posts figuring out why you are still with your useless husband. Please take care of yourself, because it's clear that no one else in your life has YOU as a priority.

If you don't take care of yourself no one else will. Gimlet is spot on.

I bet he was like this before but y’all have more responsibility now and he’s showing his true colors. He’s a financial and
Emotional vampire. He’s gonna bleed you dry. Notice how he guilted and manipulated you very adeptly. It worked. You need to consider separating from this man. He reminds me of Nimrod - the ex i ditched. He did a lot damage to my emotions and he was a user/loser like the guy your saddled with.

I can't imagine any child abandoning a parent who a) is alone already b) has cancer. I saw my dad slowly slip away in a brutal manner over 1.5 years. It took the entire family, including my mom to help transition him to his final days. We all sacrificed time with our own children and spouses to be there for my dad-he certainly deserved every second of it. I'm glad our spouses were understanding.

It is the most cruel, dehumanizing, devastating disease your dh will watch his PARENT go through. And here you're bitching about some advil and not having 'us' time. Priorities~

If you're feeling no 'support' from your dh- it's because life may be returning the 'support' you're investing in your family as well (and yes, MIL is family). This hit a very sour note for me. She'll be dead soon enough and you can enjoy him to yourself uninterrupted w/her cancer needs.

She can demand from her SON whatever she wants- it's up to her son to accomodate what he can and balance the rest. Her issues are with her dh.

nd it makes me seem like I have no empathy for others. I tend to look for a solution instead of focusing on the emotional need of the person. Like his mom for example, I would like to tell her "NO" to coming over this weekend but Dh will not say no."

I understand WHY he would say she CAN come and YES, you would be wrong to say no. I recall vividly those 'we need to talk in person' summons.....tough when you have 'life' going on- but life sometimes reminds you of what to prioritize.

As for you- time to stand up for yourSELF with your dh AND your boss/job regarding this. It's ridiculous that you injured at work and are there w/no advil even. Take care of the issue.

Iamloising it, I sent u a message. I am trying to see if we are near each other.

My aunt was recently diagnosed with lung and breast cancer. She has a horrible cold a breathing is really hard for her. She had a wonderful military and medical career and it broke my heart last night having to explain over the phone how to use the nebulizer. I love her but she is a difficult person. However she needs me now, but I am in a place where I can help her.

I get where your crappy fiance is coming from with the worry and guilt but he is a manbaby who can't take care of himself let alone others.

Gimlet has given such beautiful advice. I’d reas it a few times.

Hope you feel better soon. Keep icing your foot. And ask around the office if someone has Advil.

Try a boot for your foot and see if that helps.

I had a work based injury when I was early in my career. The doctor said no using my hand even for typing. My boss looked at the massive stack of work I had to do and told me to figure it out. I worked one handed for weeks and everything took so long I barely slept because I had to stay late every night. Now that I am older, wiser, and have the benefit of the savings that come with that experience, I would tell my boss that I would work one handed for 8 hours and then I was going home, deadlines be damned. So if he wanted the work done he would find me help.

I understand you aren’t in the position to really take a stand on this, but you can still protect yourself. When packages get delivered, greet them with an apology that you can’t stand so they need to set the package over there and bring you the form to sign. Then you call the person receiving the package to come get it themself. You are still doing your job and complaining about a small modification can get them sued. I’m not sure what your exact job is, I’m guessing a receptionist or office manager. You can answer phones and do paperwork. Photocopying, restocking the kitchen, whatever it is you normally do either gets skipped or someone else does it. Do what parts of your job you can do safely and force them to figure out the rest.

Iamlosingit, you've been given so much sensible, logical advice over the past several months. I wish you would at least consider making a plan to end this farce of a marriage. You are never, ever going to get your needs met by this man. He isn't even marriage material. He is INCAPABLE, period, and has shown you over and over that you cannot count on him for ANYTHING.

You need to stop wringing your hands, lace up your bi!ch boots, and TAKE CONTROL of ALL finances. Start selling his stuff. Electronics, sporting goods, clothes, whatever. He owes you money, and the only way you'll ever see it is if YOU expend the effort to recoup it.
Make him close ALL his accounts, turn over ALL of his paychecks to you and give him a few bucks a week allowance. NO EXCEPTIONS, NO DISCUSSIONS. The simple fact is this is a person who cannot be trusted with money, EVER. If he wants to help his mother, he can get another job.
Tell his relatives that due to your H's financial irresponsibility you are unable to offer help at this time. They WILL figure things out. That's what grownups do.
Save every penny you can until you've built a solid financial cushion, then kick him out, file for divorce, get a couple of roommates, and BE HAPPY!