Should I stay
So Iv been in a relationship with my bf for 8 months living together for 4 we both have 3yr old daughters I get on great with my sd and my daughter and sd get along but my daughter always seams to upset her when my bf checks on them Iv never saw it but it's getting to stage where he's ready to leave today took the cake and I acted in a way that I'm ashamed off and I snapped. Bf was in a bad mood started shouting at me so I took the rubbish out and as I was coming back in I could hear him shouting and all I can think is wtf has mine done now so Iv come in and she has snatched a book off sd bf going off his nut so I leave him to it and carry on cleaning he comes up to me and tells me to sort it out I'm in the bedroom talking to her and all she's doing is crying for her dad so I leave her and carry on cleaning bf still going mad saying he's leaving that he is sick of his daughter being treated like this and I understand she is pretty much an angel very really ever dose anything wrong so I going in to talk to her still crying for her dad so I smack her hand and ask her again and carry on she says she will talk to me then bf comes in shouting that it's not work so I smack her bum and send her to bed and since that happened I feel so much guilt I know I only acted like that because he wanted me to and I think it's strange that after she agreed to talk he came in shouting Iv never got a real answer out of her for why she's mean to sd but I think it's got to the point where I need to decide if I should stay or go (sorry for any mistakes doing it on iPhone and can't see all of the screen)
No, you should not stay, you
No, you should not stay, you should not have moved in with him in the first place.
I know you are upset. But
I know you are upset. But sentences and punctuation would make this a lot easier to read and understand, and you'll get more useful responses.
I did pick up on the shouting. Nobody shouts at me and certainly not at my 3 year old. That's frightening, and I would not stay in a situation like that.
I am not 100% sure about who
I am not 100% sure about who you smacked. Your DD or his?
But, it sounds like your BF is having an overly aggressive reaction to what amounts to two toddlers not doing a great job of "sharing".
It's positive in some ways that you can acknowledge that your daughter may be more to "blame" for the dust ups, but I don't think that hitting her is really going to solve your problems. A screaming guy isn't going to solve them either.
So your daughter snatched a book from her... that should not result in screaming. That should result in your daughter being told to not do that and to have her attention redirected. And... maybe closer supervision would be helpful.
Slapping a child in the hand
Slapping a child in the hand and then her bottom is not going to make a child stop crying, it up and start talking.
Where is the child's father that your little one misses him so? Or is it she's afraid of all the BF's shouting and roughness? Knowing a man four months isn't very long to up and move in together when little children are involved. Now you've lived with this man for an additional four months.
If at eight month you are already questioned the relationship and whether this environment is right for your three year old daughter, I think you probably already know your answer.
I'm going to suggest you move back out, or he (whichever one moved in) and focus on your child. She's awfully young for all the changes going on in her young life. You can still date your BF. Take longer to get to know each other. Take time for some adult socialization and perhaps slowly tossing in a bit of both girls and you and BF on occasional weekend afternoons. Doing fun kid outings.
Or break clean. I can't say whether this man is Mr Right in the long run, but he certainly doesn't appear to be Mr. Right at this time in your life with your other responsibilities. You just escalated physically disciplining your daughter to please your BF. That should be of great concern and something to think very long and hard about.
dating 8 months, living
dating 8 months, living together 4 of those 8 - no you should not stay...... everything was way to fast and your life will turn into hell.
Sorry but you do not move in so quickly... you hardly know the person,
This man is shouting at a 3
This man is shouting at a 3 year old because he's in a bad mood?
I guess it's up to what you're willing to tolerate. I am from a no-shout family and it was never appropriate to yell at someone so if a man I was with started yelling at me, I would be done.
This relationship is new and it is also throwing up all the red flags, time to break up and move on.
This is terrible. Just
This is terrible. Just concentrate on raising your daughter and MOVE OUT, I know there's plenty of spanking advocates out there but I'll never understand how hitting someone who is smaller than you is considered ok. Do you know that women who live with men that aren't their child's father when the child is under he age of five have a 500% greater chance of their child being sexually abused or murdered? And yes that is five HUNDRED percent more. I just wouldn't put my child in that kind of risk category. And fyi I raised/ almost raised (28,25,17) three wildly successful, kind, and well rounded human beings without hitting them.