He said yes!!
I asked So last night and he loves the idea of going to see the eclipse. I got 2 rooms hoping him and I could share and the kids could share the other but he doesn't want to put us in his kids faces. I understand it so it will be ds and I in one room and him and his children in the other. We are leaving Sunday morning unless there is a Saturday cancellation. I'm calling every few hours to check. I would love a full weekend of us instead of just a night but I'll be happy with either.
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oh dear Cutter..... I will
oh dear Cutter..... I will not do it then, I'm sorry you and SO are adults, sooner or later his kids will have to accept you as his partner, but currently he's putting his kids above you... this will not end happy...
I know, skid was always above me and after 14 years I walked away... it's never going to change
I'm sorry to hear that. Are
I'm sorry to hear that. Are you completely over? So and I are just beginning to blend our families. He needs to go slow since his kids mom passed. I have to be understanding and i am trying.
if you allow certain things
if you allow certain things now... because you are just starting to blend.... it's never going to change Cutter.
your SO needs to explain to his children, yes Mum is no more, I do have the right to go on with life, I'm still here, it does not mean you have to replace Mum, it only means there's some one else whom you can accept and talk to and have a stand in mum when you need her... she never will take mum's place in your heart but there's space for her as well and it's not wrong loving her, mum would want you to be nice to her....
The sooner the better... or he will never have that talk with them
I'm in the line of the
I'm in the line of the eclipse. I am keeping my butt home, they are worried traffic will be unbearable. Stay safe!
Thanks. I know it will be
Thanks. I know it will be horrible.
This sounds exciting. I do
This sounds exciting. I do think maybe you should push a little to share a room. Just my opinion. These are all fairly older kids that I am sure if they watch T.V. understand what happens between a man and woman. It has been several months and sounds like you are around the kids enough for them to know that their dad cares about you.
These are all things you may have answered before but I am asking.
Have you spent the night at his house?
Do you both say I love you in front of the children?
Are you two affectionate around one another in front of the kids?
I get taking things slow I really do. My SO and I did a trip to his parents cabin. We slept in different rooms and his son slept in the another are of the cabin. We had been together for like 6 going on 7 months. I really do get it. There comes a time when you both just have to bite the bullet and see what happens. If this is the first trip all of you going away I think you two sleeping in different rooms with your own kids could set a bad precedent. This is a good opportunity for the two of you to share a room as well it is neutral ground as well. It is not their house or your house.
Just a thought that is all. Good luck.
He isn't comfortable having
He isn't comfortable having public displays of affection in front of his kids. We're starting to show the kids that we are a couple. I may push to share the room I'm not sure yet.
He might just need a slight
He might just need a slight nudge. I would just suggest to him again. Maybe say something like "I really would like for us to share a room and the kids. This could be a good bonding experience for all our kids to get more use to one another and have some fun together. Also could be an easy way for us to test the waters to see if our children will be ok with us sharing a room. It is neutral ground for everyone. Just an idea."
Never hurts to try. If he says he still wants to stay separate rooms for now after you ask again than let it go and hopefully you will have another chance soon.
Good luck again.
You might want to leave well
You might want to leave well enough alone.
He agreed to go on the trip. He was honest and told you what he was comfortable with in regards to sleeping arrangements.
Respect that and stop pushing for something he has told you isn't going to happen
^^^This^^^ Why run the risk
^^^This^^^ Why run the risk of ruining the trip for you or the kids? I think him going on the trip with his kids and you is a step forward, no need to push things further right now.
My DH and I waited a solid
My DH and I waited a solid year before we introduced each other or his kids to my kids. I had my own place and he had his. We saw each other when we didn't have kids. We had every other weekend without kids. This allowed us to work out all the kinks in our relationship without kids or exs interfering. It also allowed us to both see that we were serious about our relationship.