Disrespect and OMG someone please help!!!
Okay.. So, A little back ground... I am a mother/step mother of 5 beautiful kids 3 bio daughters one I share with my husband. 1 beautiful step daughter and my step son. (Quick side note) My relationship with my step kids is better than their relation ship with thier dad.. Anyways my dear step daughter just turned 5 and the issue ive been having is he will not correct her bad behavior. I used to but he got angry over it so we had a talk and agreed he would start doing the correcting. Well he has not followed through at all and I dont know what to do... its gotten to the point where my kids who live with us dont think they have to follow the rules because Bella doesnt have to... This is extra hard because he gets on me for not enforcing rules... I just feel so i dont even know how to feel... but my middle daughter who is partially deaf is here half the week and at her dads the other half.. well she didnt want to come home because Bella is here and the last few times they were around eachother Bella was extremely rude to her like 100% disrespectful her father seen it all and did absolutely nothing about it. I need advise quick. Not to mention he never even asked me if i could watch her while he works tomorrow too... He doesnt respect me i dont know what to do. Any advice would be amazing... (btw this isnt his normal visitation day either...)
No authority and respect from
No authority and respect from DH = no babysitting for out of control child. Best tell him the news now so he can make arrangements for child care.
Don't let your own children be run off or influenced by this dynamic between DH and Sd.
I experience the same thing
I experience the same thing at my house with my SD9. I think Dh feels guilty about correcting her. Yours might as well. But, it sounds like the bigger issue is that he is FAVORING her and that not only creates resentment for you, but his other children as well. How did he feel when your daughter didnt want to come over? Did you tell him it was bc of SD? I would tell him that you love him, but if he wants and expects you to watch SD, he needs to lay down the law with her and uphold it and if not then I would drop her off at a daycare and hand him the bill afterwards.
He needs to make some serious changes at home and start treating ALL the kids there the same. Favoritism due to guilt or whatever is a recipe for disaster. And it hurts doesnt it? I know for me I when this happens I feel invisible and like I dont matter. So if you dont matter, then tell him you dont know what his expectation of your role in the family is. Is your role to handle everything and he handle nothing? If so thats not a relationship, that a user.
Do some thinking and talk with him. If he continues not to discipline his daughter and dump her on you without even asking and never say THANK YOU for all you do, take a break and let him handle the house for a few days without you. He might start to appreciate you then. Best of luck. Sorry you are in this situation, but you are not alone. And you DO have power. Use it girl