downsouthinTX's picture

not gonna remind SD17 about prom or college

In less than 20 days SD17 goes to prom. she has called one hair place about an appointment and they were booked for prom day. last year she waited until the last minute and when she booked her hair the girl told her "oh yeah i can do that, no problem" and SD17 showed up and the girl said she didnt know how but would try....she spent way too long at hair appointment and almost missed the makeup appointment.

but i am refraining from talking about prom and her deadlines. im just gonna be the picture taker that night.

SD17 also rescheduled her placement test with the community college. so she can try to do better and not need so many refresher courses/semesters.

BUT prior to doing that she finally got with her cousin and uncle about a 6 day graduation trip they wanted to plan. they planned it and booked it and uncle paid for it as a surprise. somehow i knew either uncle or grandma would be paying because the cousin has no money.

after it was booked SO says to her..."uh what about summer school and those remedial classes you need?"
SD17 "uh i dunno...."
SO to me "when does the summer classes start?"
me "end of May, before HS graduation."
SO to SD17 "what are you going to do about that SD17?"
me to add "the community college is more strict on attendance than high school. there is no parental notes because you are an adult. you are limited to 5-6 days per semester or they will drop you and you will lose the money you paid for the class"
SO to SD17 "you better get your sh1t together SD17. Im not going to tolerate laziness on school"
i didnt say another word.

chances are shes going to have to take 2 classes this summer at minimum. she was 2 semesters(levels) behind in 2 core classes and 1 semester(level) behind in the other. if she does better with the re-test maybe she will just 1 semester of the 2 core classes and college level in the other. one can hope right?

i am just letting things fall where they may and know that i came onto this late in SD17 game. and they are not my kids. i am a little more helicopter parent when it comes to school and grades than SO. im not all crazy but more involved and i NEVER do the work for them. but i do make sure they keep grades up and take harder classes and use every opportunity they can get.

this week i am taking BM's computer to a shop and having them hack the password. we have tried at home methods and hard drive docking stations but the computer is a 2004/2005 model. too old for todays stuff. SO said he tried long ago but couldn't get the password. he wants the pics of the kids and BM off of it and due to the fact there may be pics he doesn't want to see(like BM and her BF in compromising situations) hes left it to me to sift through(i volunteered).I also want pics fro SD17 picture project i am working on for graduation. i am fine with gathering pics and at this point i consider myself a neutral 3rd party because i have no emotional attachment. pictures are my thing and the archival of them and organization. i am my own extended families picture storage person as well.


advice.only's picture

Yeah just beware, once seen

Yeah just beware, once seen some things can never be unseen Barf! We gave SD our old laptop and she uploaded pictures of meth whore's popped boob because they were trying to get it fixed via television shows.

—

Call me Chardonay

Ninji's picture

What?

What?

advice.only's picture

Meth whore drove off a cliff

Meth whore drove off a cliff and one of her implants popped due to the accident. Since she's a drug addict with no income she couldn't get it fixed, so she and SD decided to try send e-mails to all those reality plastic surgery shows for them to fix it. When SD moved out I cleaned up the laptop so that BS could use it for school, I had the joy of finding those pictures.

—

Call me Chardonay

Ninji's picture

Ahhh ok. So, is she just

Ahhh ok. So, is she just walking around with a deflated boob?

advice.only's picture

Not anymore, I guess grandhag

Not anymore, I guess grandhag finally caved in and paid to get it fixed.

—

Call me Chardonay

moving_on's picture

Not gonna lie, kinda want to

Barf! Barf! Barf! Barf!

Not gonna lie, kinda want to see it.

—

When a healthy person behaves in a way that hurts others, they take responsibility for that action and make amends. - Kelly Berdine

downsouthinTX's picture

LOL welllllll i know BM did

LOL

welllllll i know BM did not have implants...but as SO says...shes was a little bit wild so who knows what things are on there.
they had been split for years when she passed and she was on man #2 or 3 since SO by then.

i am just hoping to recover lost pics of the kids and BM for them to have and thats SO's goal too.

Clevergirlfriend99's picture

If it's a windows system, I

If it's a windows system, I know how to hack the password and can lead you to the instructions. Laughing out loud

Is anyone in your house comfortable with technology?

I know multiple ways to do it but the easiest way to get files off the system is to mount it as a data drive to a Linux system and copy the files off it.

A more technical way is to copy off the SAM file (password file) and replace it so that you can log in. Not for the technically challenged.

downsouthinTX's picture

i am pretty savvy with tech,

i am pretty savvy with tech, more so than SO...we have removed the hard drive from the tower and used a "docking station" from Best Buy however the connector was not the right type for the hard drive because the computer was too old. Ive used that method before when a computer died and i wanted the data.

the repair place said they can hack the Windows log on password in minutes for $20.
$20 is not a bad price to pay for time saved.

and i figure its cheaper than them taking all the files off and putting them onto another hard drive. not to mention they might see things as well.

Clevergirlfriend99's picture

$20 is cheap. The boot disk

$20 is cheap. The boot disk and technique to replace the SAM file is pretty easy, but for $20, I'd do what you're doing. Our time is valuable!! Smiling

renewal 11-11's picture

WTH, you are not going to

WTH, you are not going to remind her of getting her hair done. Bless your heart. What do you have against SD and her father? You seem to always have some sort of problem that really is not a problem. If not reminding her of college and getting hair done for prom is your problem you have it pretty easy as a SM.

downsouthinTX's picture

i have nothing against

i have nothing against them.

BUT my motherly instinct wants to remind her and keep on top of it all. and i have to remind myself to let the chips fall where they may because that is SD17 best method to learning. she does not learn when rescued or has her hand held. shes a "learn the hard way" type of kid.

renewal 11-11's picture

I get it.

I get it.

Stepped in what momma's picture

Maybe you could help SO to

Maybe you could help SO to remind her to set her hair appt.

—

Ain't going to lie- skids make me want to poke myself in the eye

HappyCow's picture

I completely understand where

I completely understand where you are coming from. I had to do the same thing my SD(now 18). Sometimes, you just need to step back and try not to rescue them when you can see things about to fall apart. The only way for some kids to learn is to step away. Keep strong! I still have to remind myself to back away and my SD is now 18 and in college. I hope I will do the same for my own daughter or that I will have taught her to get her sh*t together and not wait until the last minute.

DaizyDuke's picture

I get it, I'm a bit of a

I get it, I'm a bit of a helicopter parent when it comes to BS7 and I'm also NOT a fly by the seat of my pants person. This summer is going to be EXTREMELY difficult for me because DH and SD19 are planning all this stupid shit that I KNOW is going to end in a cluster fuck but I refuse to stress myself out about it. They can cluster together.. I will go about my merry way.

SD19 thinks she will come to our state and get her DL here so she can just go back to University state and transfer it (which I know she will never do and why pay the fee in TWO states???? ... but DH thinks this is a grand plan)

DH told me the other night that he "got SD19 a job" at a sporting goods store while she is home this summer... the store is 20-25 minutes from our house. So who the fuck is going to take her and then run back and pick her up???? All I know is it WON'T be me. One month ago the plan was for her to get a job at the convenient store that is 5 minutes from our house??? Oh but that would be too easy, better to create a cluster.

SD19 thinks she is going to rent an apartment with her boyfriend next year AND pay for car insurance whilst working PT at a hog dog joint??

I still have NO freaking clue how DH thinks SD is going to get this car that "we" are giving her back to her University state since she is not on our insurance and the vehicle will have to have our plates on it and still be registered and titled to us until she transfers everything over in her state (can you say LIABILITY??).... The only proper way to do it is if DH drives her back and makes sure she gets everything taken care of before he leaves University state.. but I DON'T see this happening. But whatever. NOT.MY.PROBLEM.

I'm just kicking back waiting to say "I told you so" when DH flips out over the cluster they have created.... as usual.

—

ღIt' all fun and games until someone doesn't pick up on the sarcasm ღ
ツ I wish I was as thin as my patience ツ

downsouthinTX's picture

when SD17 wanted to take this

when SD17 wanted to take this grad trip with the cousin...SO said...im out. im not doing a thing. you want this you figure it out. he thinks its a dumb idea because its a waste of time and money.

i just informed my co worker last week that when her SD17 graduates and does not move in with them and will not be enrolling in college until the spring 2018 semester that they can not legally hold her on car insurance anymore.
she was shocked...but i said...um shes not going to be living with you ever, no CS, no custody, not even college...she wrecked it would all be false. shes not under yalls wing anymore.
coworker was shocked but also happy. LOL as she said -we would save sooo much $$.

DaizyDuke's picture

Oh yeah... DH and SD had this

Oh yeah... DH and SD had this grand scheme that he would just put her on our insurance. I knew it couldn't be as easy as that, especially since she is claiming independent status on all her student loans.. um duh!!! Can't show she lives with us!!! so anyway I live chatted with the our insurance company (so I could print the whole thing out) and was told that no, because SD will be living off campus in another state, she will have to get her own insurance policy. Agent also said that title needs to be in HER name or we are still liable if something happens.

I'm not playing these stupid "wing it" games when it comes to car insurance and accidents and losing everything we have! UGH

—

ღIt' all fun and games until someone doesn't pick up on the sarcasm ღ
ツ I wish I was as thin as my patience ツ

Clevergirlfriend99's picture

Please "sell" the car to DH

Please "sell" the car to DH and register the car in HIS name alone. Then he can do whatever he likes and your name is not on the car.

Cover your butt.

(Seriously. If that girl wrecks the car and hurts someone, they will sue you and if your name is on the car, they will come after you. You need to insulate yourself)

mustang2008's picture

Good....she is not your SD

Good....she is not your SD and it is not your problem to try and control.

I also would not recommend doing anything with the computer. It feels super creepy and a violation of her privacy. Bad Karma Ju-Ju.

All of this is on your boyfriend. I would take a step back and just leave this for him to handle.