Learning Moment
So last weekend I discovered the door to the pantry was broken, obviously forced off the rails due go the broken pieces I found.
At the time DH was as usual "so what no biggie" as I was explaining WHY it IS a big deal. SD11 and her friend had been messing around in the kitchen and I had told them to calm down and get out...I had errands to do and did not follow up.
DH, to my knowledge, did nothing with SDs. He paid for a nice curtain is all. I took down door, discarded it, fixed the door frame, painted, etc.
The other day DH told me it looked nice. Thanks, but no thanks DH. He then tells me he asked SDs about it. Neither admitted it, but he said the thought SD11 was going to say something but didn't. I told him why should she? Nothing will happen either way...you 'chat' about it, but guess who fixes everything? (Add reminder about the other stuff too).
He STILL is irritated with me and tries to change subject to the Amazon show we have been watching, "Fleabag." We agree on it and he mentions how he is amazed that the main character stole a valuable item from her stepmom (hey guys, it is a good step mom character!). He is confused about why she got away with it. (Me: !!!!)
Well, DH. Basically she doesn't respect her step mom at all. For no outright reason. So when step mom tells her it's valuable and please put it down and no you cannot have it, she doesn't respect that at all. So she takes it. And when her dad asks her what happened to the statue all she has to say is,"No daddy I didn't do it." Dad sighs, says Ok. But later at the party step mom lets her know she knows. But she can't tell her directly she knows she did it, because Dad has told SM she didn't and SM cannot challenge dad about it. So SM is passive aggressive because she has no choice or say in fixing issue."
DH finally sees this is what he has done, and a bit irritated asks what he should have done. Told him I've told him before so what is the point? He asks again, ok fine. BOTH SDs should help me fix it beginning to end, unless one admits it. If no one admits it then both implicated. If one admits it only that one should help. They need to learn it is a PITA to break stuff and what it takes to actually fix things...and so on.
DH may have heard me but I'm not holding my breath.
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Comments
Maybe your DH can fix it -
Maybe your DH can fix it - since he thinks it's no big deal.
ETA: oh I see you already fixed it. Why not ask DH to fix it instead? A curtain is not the same as a door.
We watch Fleabag. They
We watch Fleabag. They portray the SM as a sexual predator who preyed on their grieving father right after their mom passed away and who tries to minimize the deceased wife and daughters memory and presence from the dad's life. There is a reason why they steal the statue, I'm surprised DH didnt get that.
Sorry about your door, though. Nanny cam.
I didn't say it was right or
I didn't say it was right or legal. I said that was the reason why they steal it.
Really? I think we haven not
Really? I think we haven not got to the step mom reason or I have to watch that again!!! Crap I usually catch things like that.
Yeah they portray the stepmom
Yeah they portray the stepmom in a horrendous light.
But does not excuse
But does not excuse stealing...I am going to rewatch. But is the SM really a predator or do her SDs just see it that way? The dad was clearly disengaged from the SDs for a long time...
The stepmom was the moms best
The stepmom was the moms best friend and the daughters godmother, and the show implies that she pounced immediately after their mothers death. There is an episode where it's their mothers yearly memorial day where it is usually just the dad and daughters remembering their mother and stepmom worms her way in. When the dad starts talking about mom, stepmom interjects things about her ex boyfriend as if they are chatting about exes and not the daughters deceased mom. Then one of the daughters says she is going to use the bathroom and the stepmom gives her directions, and this is the daughters childhood home. She also has a sex exhibit with plaster cast penis art of her past lovers and asks one of the daughters if she can correctly identify her dads penis. The daughter does. They do not portray the stepmom in a flattering light. She is smart but in a manipulative and conniving, exclusionary way.
Interesting. We aren't that
Interesting. We aren't that far along yet so I'll see if the next episodes change my mind. I also know the main character is not innocent by any means...
Oh, and at the end of the
Oh, and at the end of the season Fleabag let's stepmoms cat out of the house and into the street where the cat runs away. My coworker said that was her favorite part and what good revenge. When people cheer for stepmom losing her cat, the stepmom is clearly the antagonist, not the protagonist.
Hard to believe how twisted
Hard to believe how twisted some people are
I do a better job fixing
I do a better job fixing thing. DH is not handy at all and very likely he would just leave it open and no fix anything. I can live with the curtian at this point (my choice because I wasn't spending more time on it). Usually I will have him do something else to compensate for my time spent like vacuuming the entire house and cleaning our bathroom (both done).
Yep blind spot as big as his
Yep blind spot as big as his eyeball.
curtain as pantry door, no
curtain as pantry door, no way in hell... I will get an iron door and make sure it's very secure and can lock with a security lock.... only I will have a key and I will keep on saying..
sorry girls you broke the previous door, you lost all rights to be in the pantry....
I wish. But I'm not spending
I wish. But I'm not spending the $$ on it.
Nope - not even allowing DH to do it.
No door is the result. I know they will hate the curtain.
Just like most other things that get broken don't get replaced, period.
The only thing I did replace was the large cabinet drawer last year because I really needed it.
I did consider not fixing it but couldn't do it.
Why would they care one way
Why would they care one way or another curtain vs door? It's a pantry.
SD13 is picky about her
SD13 is picky about her surroundings/decor.
But the ironic thing is she is a slob.
She wants things perfect but doesn't care about how it gets that way.