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OSD and the upcoming Baby Shower for YSD

Disillusioned's picture

Recently when talking to YSD (when she mentioned she was coming home for a visit end of this month, that BM was holding a baby shower for her, that she really wanted me there, could I bring my sisters, yada yada) I had agreed, simply for her sake

I receive the einvite from BM/OSD, and accepted. I thanked BM/OSD, and asked if there was anything I could bring.

Didn't receive a response until a couple days ago, when OSD asks me if I could bring appetizers. She lists what is coming so far, but says bring whatever I like. I suggest something not already on the list, she says that's perfect, thanks so much

I tell her it's no problem and to enjoy her weekend. No response to that

I remind myself that OSD is particularly nice when she wants something, but as she's often reminded me, I serve no value in her life

....well, I'll bring the appetizers, my sisters and some wine Biggrin , even flowers for BM since it's hosted in her home. Take lots of pictures for DH. Bring a nice gift for YSD. And be on my way

I really don't want to go, but for YSD's sake I will. And if I have to go into BM's home and put up with her, OSD and possibly DH's sister as well, I will do it all with class and charm!

Hopefully YSD at least will appreciate it, but if not, at least I know I did the right thing. And my sisters and I will have a blast together either way Dirol

TwirlMS's picture

This is a very positive attitude Disillusioned, one we can all benefit from hearing. I applaud your post and say, give me more of that.

twoviewpoints's picture

I was just reading in the General section where SIL brought her own main dish for herself to the birthday dinner. I think it was very generous for you to offer to bring something to the shower to begin with, but even moreso after reading the birthday food snub. Your SIL is one strange duck. Anyway...

I love little baby items. All those tiny sized pink or blues. Last baby shower for my family was my niece's son. My mother and I went in together and got all the crib, bedding and jungle print curtains niece had on her list.

I'm sure you and your sisters will have a good time.

Disillusioned's picture

Wicked, don't worry about Heaven. I think her problems are more than her just getting old Biggrin

If she doesn't like what other's post she doesn't have to read them.

You're absolutely right. Her nasty comments are offensive and unwarranted. Just plain rude.

Disillusioned's picture

Thanks Dadswife, so glad for you all these events are over....looking forward to that in future for sure!

I do hope SIL, OSD and BM will be on better behaviour while we're there, but I do anticipate some of the usual manipulations....SIL trying to create drama between BM and I, SIL playing up to BM in front of me as much as she can.

And then there's OSD, she is highly manipulative. She has always tried to play parent off parent, parent of step-parent, even step-parent off step-parent. And although OSD has always created drama and lies about my family, she even has tried to play my siblings and I off each other, particularly one of my sister's (who she knows will be at the shower) but this sister is so so so on to her it back-fires every time Biggrin

I think we'll do as you say, just focus on having a nice time the sisters and I Dirol and definitely have a nice visit with YSD too - who will be spoiled rotten by my sisters - which YSD totally loves Smile

Disillusioned's picture

Dadswife, your SD sounds like a combination of my OSD and DH's sister :jawdrop: scary!!

Yes, OSD can look you straight in the eyes, and say the most unacceptable things, all with the most sugary voice and sweetest smile....takes a few minutes for you to register the nasty words with the 'sweet' tone - and then you get shivers when you realize there is a crazy nuthouse quality to it all }:)

Rags's picture

It sounds to me that you and even the SD's and BM are on a reasonable behavior platform.

That can work if everyone remains reasonable.

Enjoy the shower and enjoy the time with your sisters.