Holidays
Forums:
DH is pushing for a 'family holiday' this year. I have posted about how difficult SD8s behaviour is previously.
To be honest going away with her at the moment is my idea of hell. She is rude, disrespectful to adults (especially DH) she can't get on with other children, school report constant arguing and sometimes hurting other children. She doesn't listen or follow instructions and is so hyper she exhausts everyone around her.
My dilemma is that as she is FT (BM deceased) I feel like if we don't then she is being deprived of having a holiday (we didn't take her last year as her GM took her away)
Any thoughts, advice would be welcome!
Is anyone working on her
Is anyone working on her behaviour? Why is she so misbehaved? Does it have to do with BM passing away? Was that recent? I feel like we need some background details or maybe I'm missing something. I would address the behaviour before thinking about a trip.
"Gosh hon, I really need to
"Gosh hon, I really need to save up for XYZ so I just can't afford to take a holiday. But if you feel like she just has to have one, then go and have a good time."
We rarely took vacations when I was a kid. My parents were saving up for their retirement and putting money in our college funds. She will not die if she can't take a vacation. You, on the other hand, may have a nervous breakdown and harm yourself if you have to spend all that time with Miss Bratty Pants.
OP's original forum posting.
OP's original forum posting. Says BM passed when SD was a baby.
https://www.steptalk.org/node/234901
Kid sounds like quite the handful. OP, you stated she's had counseling, but has she ever been evaluated for something like ADD/ADHD?
I asked him why he wants this
I asked him why he wants this trip and he said he feels he 'should at least try' to take her on holiday and he wants us all to go away together....he did admit that he isn't really looking forward to the prospect but feels he can't go away without her every year as he is her only parent.
We did agree this would be based on her behaviour but judging by her start to the year it's not looking good... il have to start worrying if she ups her game and starts behaving like a decent human being.
She has had some therapy through the school and we are signing her up for something private too.
Oh the joys of not being able to even plan a vacation with your DH due to skids behaviour and his poor parenting in the past!
I never went on a holiday
I never went on a holiday with my SDs, ever. The only 2 times I ever went anywhere with them and DH was a weekend to his mother's, and a weekend trip to my daughter's wedding. It just would have been no holiday for me, it would have been torture. I agree with Ladyface.
Perhaps he could take her to a theme park or something for a long weekend, as he wants it so much.
That's easy to resolve - it's
That's easy to resolve - it's not like the family holiday is next week
simply tell DH... we can try but you will have to be on her with her rude manners and it has to be resolved before then...... or we will not be doing any family holiday together, DH can start parenting now and every time she's a brat... he needs to parent till she learns to keep her trap shut and behave
I think you should go for a
I think you should go for a holiday. Keeping her in and all controlled is not going to help in anyways. In fact, I would say, try going for a vacation to Barbados. Check out this blog. http://thecrane.com/blog/2016/10/06/kids-will-love-crane-resort/ It describes all the activities for kids in there. I'm sure she'll love it and it would definitely bring up a change in her. Think about it.