Zassi's picture

Difficult but also love

Its a rough job being a step parent. Dealing with the ex's make it rough but the love of the children is helpful.

Zassi's picture

I've been a step parent for a

I've been a step parent for a year on Monday. N both my step daughters are from different moms the oldests mom is okay dealing with and then there is the youngests mom who is s complete nightmare. We're going to court in a couple of days she is taking us for contempt of the custody order which in fact she is in contempt. She is also trying to change the custody from joint legal and joint physical to our time visitations. This person I put a restraining order on because she is so vicious. Has anyone dealt with this same issue?

anniegetyourdrinkon's picture my step hell the bm my step hell the bm is a psycho and sd took right after her mom. So no love there at all.

As far as bm2 make sure you have a decent lawyer and solid I g that she is the one in contempt. Good luck!

anniegetyourdrinkon's picture

Dup sorry. My comp sucks

Dup sorry. My comp sucks lately...smh!

Acratopotes's picture

I think we all deal with

I think we all deal with these issues.....

all I can advice, disengage from BM, she's nothing to you, you do not speak to her, you simply ignore her... actually all off them, just because your DH was married or had children with these woman does not mean you have to talk to them or tolerate their crap....

simply tell DH - you slept with that you deal with that, I will not be pulled into this drama

When you are dead, you don't know that you're dead. All of the pain is felt by others...

The same thing happens when you are stupid

sunshinex's picture

I've been saying that a lot

I've been saying that a lot lately to my husband... "I didn't impregnate the crazy"

DanielleR's picture

Love of the children? You

Love of the children? You have skids that actually love you but live with their BM?

MorriMom's picture

BM reported me to CPS for

BM reported me to CPS for very vague reasons ("The boys aren't comfortable with her") and they investigated me and my apartment repeatedly... So yes, I've dealt with it. She tried to get the kids to take pictures of our apartment and then later on the house and report back to her all kinds of things that she could try to report us for with CPS. Nothing ever stuck because she never found anything, she just had to make up stuff (we're starving the kids, there's animal feces everywhere, etc.)

So no, you're not alone. And it isn't likely to stop.

- Qualified resident goose
- Zealots normally say that this tastes like chicken. Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zero. There are no loose ends
- Remember, if nothing will count you out, urine.

sunshinex's picture

It's very difficult, but if

It's very difficult, but if you have stepkids who are capable of loving you, then it can be worth it. I'm thankful I got into a relationship when SD was really young and BM is very out of the picture, so SD loves me a lot and tells me that every day. When things get hard, I try to focus on the fact that every young child needs a mother figure when there's is absent. If BM gets involved in the future, SD starts to dislike me, or anything goes wrong, I try to tell myself that I can't regret and resent everything i've done because she needed me at the time.

AJanie's picture

The love of the children

The love of the children keeps me going some days. I cherish the closeness and love while it lasts.

BethAnne's picture

For me the child's love is

For me the child's love is not the reason I stick around it is because of my husband, after all I married him and want to be with him for the rest of my life. These child rearing years are temporary. If he wasn't worth it I would not be here.

ChiefGrownup's picture

My DH is super wonderful. My

My DH is super wonderful.

My ss15 loves me and is probably the most lovable person I've ever met.

So that's two.

Then there's the other side. SD17 is an extremely stressful person who up and decided to hate me even though her own bm does not.

So even though the score is 2-1 there's heavy handicapping because some days the evil gobbles up an awful lot of the good.

Schikdrenwhuch: Hansel and Gretel Blue Plate Special. -- Taushalove

I could smell the GUBM sulfur spewing from her cloven hooves eons ago. -- Ladyface