I have a step child who is a tough nut to crack. He is 11 1/2 years of age and entering the 6th grade. When I came into this child's life I was very excited. I was excited to be able to grow with this child in hopes of developing a bond with him as he is very 'close' to his dad...at the time not as close to mom.

His biological parents have coddled him from the beginning, doing everything for him and giving him everything he wanted. Needless to say this has had lasting affects on this child. He has little to no self confidence, is a wimp, unwilling to try new things, is a very picky eater, is withdrawn, hardly smiles, is very quite and still to this day given his age expects others to do things for him that he is more than capable of doing himself. When we are out in public and he is walking beside his dad, there is barely 2" of space between the two of them., not because his dad is keeping him close but because I feel he is so insecure that he wants to make sure he is right there, is scared to venture off on his own and doesn't know how to handle himself if he were to get into a situation where separation might occur.

We have 50/50 placement with him so I am unsure of what goes on at his moms house. I am only aware of his behavior here. His behavior as an 11 1/2 year old boy is very odd to me. He especially after having raised my 2 and his brother thru this age and stage of life. I think he borders on depression if not depressed. For awhile his behavior was either up or down and now its flat line.

Here's my concern: I have brought my concerns to his dad's attention many times even suggesting counseling to which I get I don't want to start down the counseling path. I feel like this child needs help, more help than I can offer. This child is the complete opposite of my biological children who are outgoing, fun to be around and who like to have fun. He is somewhat like his biological sibling in that they are both lazy, however his older brother is goofy, fun, silly, a good student and plays sports.