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Stepdaughter makes me unhappy

Joey45's picture

I met her father after he was 6 months divorced. I am attractive with 3 kids of my own. His ex gained quite a lot of weight in the following years.( I'm assuming that's why she hates me) I have been married to him for over 20 yrs now. His ex an child have still to this day are rude an talk badly about me to him..I am named jo bitch. When she was 16 instead of following judges orders she moved several states away an we moved across america. For 7 years, we had no fighting an it was wonderful.. he has always stood up for me against them. Simply because I did them no wrong . Well it all changed when she got pregnant an told her father I had to sit at McDonald's for I'm not allowed to see her baby after driving hours there. So I spend all day in my car while he visits. We her baby was born I sent him alone an even encouraged it.. she was to drive him back n forth..what actually happened was his ex took the chance to cry all over him.pull out their wedding album an she drove him back n forth. I seen the text when he left the car. I was upset he didn't tell me first Sad He has also been sending her large sums of money while hiding it ever since she stated that she doesn't want me to know what they talk about. Now we are, no longer a close couple who knew an make decisions together. He leads a dbl life when it comes to his daughter an I'm resentful. That after all these years. He allows me to be disrespected an sends money to her. He just tinted all her windows in her car. Cuz she brought a junkie home an he died.. I'm like eh? Stop with the guilty daddy syndrome. I don't like to feel this way..but my daughter for the first time asked for some help an he told her he won't help her with her mistake but, he has thrown quite a few thousand at his daughter in the last 2 years.. an I am starting to dislike her... I only want my daddy time an your wife isn't allowed to know anything.. we starting to fall apart. I don't know what to do with my 25 yr old stepchild.

twoviewpoints's picture

"I don't know what to do with my 25 yr old stepchild."

You really can't 'do' anything with your SD. She obviously doesn't care what you say, think or do. You don't exist. What you best be 'doing with' is that husband of yours.

" she got pregnant an told her father I had to sit at McDonald's for I'm not allowed to see her baby after driving hours there. So I spend all day in my car while he visits."

Because you couldn't trust your husband after the BM ride/photo book, you decided this time to drive him there yourself and he didn't tell you that you weren't invited? And you sat out in your car all day? Seriously? Why wait for him? How humiliating. You should have let him walk home. Yeah it's hours drive but I doubt at that point I'd of cared if he hitch hiked... or didn't ever come home.

The disrespect you're so unhappy/angry about came from your husband. Put the blame where it belongs. I'm not even going to ask what dead junkies and tinted windows is all about.

robin333's picture

^^^Everything another said. Your DH is doing this because you are tolerating it. Draw your line in the sand and don't waver.

If my DH ever allowed his kids to dictate where I go or insist on me sitting in the car... well, there wouldn't be a second time. Same thing regarding deceit about money.

Rags's picture

The problem is not your 25yo SD. It is your spineless ball-less husband. What to do.... lock up every penny of assets, change the locks, and take the prick for every penny he is worth.

Let him move in with his crack head breeder idiot daughter. Maybe he will join her lifestyle and be the next junky to keel over in her apartment.

Good riddance to both of them.

IMHO of course.

SugarSpice's picture

having a gutless husband is very common. you have to take things into your own hands if dh does not have your back.

this was the case with my and sds. sds were very rude to me, even insisting their father divorce me. then i put my foot down. it was very ugly for the sds. but at least i have my own sanity, dignity and bank account.