My SD11 calls me by my first name and I would not want her calling me mom either.

My first name.

first name only . I would not expect or wish to be called mom , since thankfully , I am not one.

First name
they not my kids therefore only my daughter gets to call me mum

They call me by my first name. I am not their mom. DH has it in the custody agreement that they call only call their Bio's MOM and DAD. Of course, my SD refers to her Step-dad as Dad, no clue if she calls him that. BM probably encourages it. I am sure she does it to upset her dad. Thankfully, nothing she does anymore upsets him. He is numb to her now.

I think steps should not be called MOM. Too confusing for them and everyone else.

My 14yo SS calls me by my first name and my 7yo SS switches back and forth between Mama and my first name.

My first name.

My first name. It was never an option. I told her to call me by it.

My first name. SS tried out mom for awhile but eventually went back to my name.

SGS calls me Grandma Beast. long story... LOL

My Skid calls me dad. He has from nearly the beginning since his mom and started dating when he was 15mos old and married the week before he turned 2yo.

I was the first person he called "Dad(dy)" though when he was a toddler when asked "where's daddy" he would point to a pic of the Sperm Idiot that was on the wall of my brides apartment when we were dating. Not long before we married he started calling me "Daddy" because that is what have been to him nearly his whole life.

I have no regrets about that.

We did have a couple of incidents during the 16+ years we lived under a Custody/Visitation/Support order over the what to call me issue. Sperm Grandhag was the one that took exception to me being called Dad. A couple of times over the years my SS would come home with a "(Sperm Grandhag) says you are not my real dad and I can't call you dad."

The first time he was about 8. My response was one that we had discussed a few times prior when he was asking about why he had two dads, etc.... "Son, a Bio Dad is the dad that made you with your mom. A Step Dad is the dad that is married to your mom and who loves you and your mom very much. A REAL dad is the dad that goes to work every day to work hard and provide the family with a home in a safe neighborhood that has good schools for you to go to, provides save transportation for you to ride in, teaches you to read, teaches you your numbers and letters, teaches you to tie your shoes and ride your bike, reads you bedtime stories, teaches you to use the toilet, tucks into bed at night, coaches your baseball and swim teams, goes to your school events and concerts, and loves you and your mom very much."

Skid: "A step dad sounds like a real dad to me. Dad, can we go outside and play?"

He understood that and that IMHO is the right message for a Skid to have from parents and Sparents.

The second time was a couple of years later and the conversation went something like this.

Skid: "(Sperm GrandHag) says that I have a dad and I can't call you dad and that I should call you by your first name."

Me: "Son, I have been your dad since you were a baby. We have had this talk before. If you no longer want to call me "Dad" then you can call me Mr. (Last Name). I do not allow children to call me by my first name. So, take your pick. Either "Dad" or "Mr. (Family name). Your choice."

Skid: "Dad it is. That is who you are."

End of issue.

About 10 years after that discussion he asked me to adopt him. We made that happen. Now I am the only dad he has ever had ... according to his newly issues birth certificate.

I had my own issues with this as far as my XILs are concerned. They insisted that I call them "Mom and Dad". I did for a while. Then I stopped and switched to their first names. My mom and dad are the only people I call Mom or Dad. They are the only one's I have ever had. I definitely won the parent lottery and no one else will ever be mom or dad to me ever again. I refer to the Sr. adults in my life as Mr, Mrs, Dr. or Ms and I am in my early 50s. My friends parents, my parents friends, etc... all Mr, Mrs, Dr., etc... I am frequently told by them to call them by their first names. Nope, this is not about them. This is about me. A funny situation is that I now work as a peer with one of my father's former colleagues/bosses. He insists that I call him by his first name. I capitulated but only when we are in a group of colleagues or on emails with a distribution list. When we are in 1:1 conversation or communicating in a 1:1 email it is Mr. I have to keep my head in the game not to call him Mr. in all situations. I used to babysit his three eldest kids. He is in his late 60s with a 12yo son with his second wife. I don't babysit that one.

I think each relationship is different and the relationship stipulates what anyone in it is called.

Don't sweat it. Be comfortable and work with the Skid on this. You can work it out.

IMHO of course.

My first name.

BM has a raging case of "golden uterus syndrome". She would lose her freaking mind if SK ever called or referred to me as "mom".

I look at it as that's a title I reserve for my bio children. I profusely shake my head "no" when people refer to me as her mom or step-mom. No no no no.

I do not think Step parents should be called Mom, or Dad. Just my opinion. The only time a step parent should be called mom or dad is if their Biological parent is not in the picture, rarely around, or not involved at all and the Step parent is raising them full time for a long period of time. I would not want my boyfriends children to call me mom, I would not feel comfortable and it would only cause drama between myself and BM which I would like to avoid. I raised two children who were foster children for several years, and they began to call me mom and i encouraged it only because I was adopting them, but then bio mom came back into the picture last minute. Now they were returned to their mom after 8 years. The BM hates it that they continue to call me mom, and it causes tension between us and anger towards me. My kids do not call my spouse dad, they have asked too and I have said No, they have a real dad who they see often already, one and only dad and i expect the same respect with my ex's gf.

I personally would not want my SD to call me mom. I am not her mom and do not love her like my own, so for me it would fell fake. Even when asked how many children I have I say 3 and a stepdaughter. But on the other hand, my Bio daughter calls my H dad. She has for years now and when I talked with her about it, she told me that love was thicker than blood, and he was in ever way her father. My H feels honored to be given that title by a child that is not his. My D is married know and has a 1 year old daughter, and my granddaughter calls him Paw Paw.

I feel it is what both are comfortable with, and if the Bio parent is involved in the child's life, what they are comfortable with too. I would not want my BD to call anyone mom but me, but if that were the situation, then maybe a cute nickname that they both agree on and like, something special for just them two.

My teenage ss calls me by my first name, the younger two call me M&M. I didn't like being called by my first name with the younger ones (they are 6 years younger than their teenage brother). My husband and I sat down with the younger two and talked about what we could call me other than my first name. M&M means mom #2 without actually saying it.

My first name. It suits me fine. They have a mom and I have no wish to take her place.

DD2 calls me "Mummy". I love it