I'm 32 and just recently married to a great woman. I grew up with a step father so I know some of the issues although my bio dad moved away when I was young so I only saw him sometimes. My wife has a 11 daughter who is great and is coping well with all the changes of moving, new school, parents split up two years ago. I have this issue that comes up sometimes and don't know how to deal with it. She will ask me to help her with something, this time it was to drive her and her classmates to a school field trip. I said sure I would love to help. Later that night when she talks to her dad on the phone she asks him if he can take her. My wife overheard this and stepped in telling the dad not to make plans without talking to her first. This has happened before and I have to admit it hurts to feel like I'm only good unless a better deal comes along. I try to tell her I support her spending time with her dad and help whenever I can but I also don't think it's fair to have her act like this to me. What is your suggestion for when she does something like this? My feeling is I shouldn't get upset with her but just say that I don't feel like taking her if she would rather have her dad take her which he probably wont anyways.