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Not sure what to say...

young_stepmomma25's picture

Okay so my husband thought it was a great idea for his 1yr old grandson to stay with us for a while so he could have quality time with him. We also have 10 month old twin boys together & they are a handful. So I ask him periodically when his son is coming to pick his son up, not knowing he was staying overnight, he kept switching the subject. He had to work in the morning so that was my reason on asking because the thought of me being home alone to care for 3 babies kind of spooked me. So he goes (I guess reading my mind) "SD15 will stay home from school to help watch him." Hmm...not the best solution but I guess. Before it even had to come to that thought, he could've just asked out of consideration if I could (even though it would be a hard NO) but he didn't even think of doing that & it makes me feel sort of peeved. So to everyone's inconvenience (well not so much his daughter's since she wanted to stay home) he gets to have his "quality time" with his grandson. It might be my hormones but I thought it was kind of dumb on his behalf...

young_stepmomma25's picture

Yeah apparently you could still have sex and reproduce til whenever (not so much a woman but sperm are long lasting swimmers :O ) but yeah that's a little life lesson...it happens *shrugs*

young_stepmomma25's picture

The last sentence "...as long as they breed early & often"...why did that make me laugh...tsk tsk...me & my weird humor.

young_stepmomma25's picture

I figured as much, so I really can't feel mad but just a bit puzzled as to how his thought process is set up. Like I said, even if he considered to ask me, I would've felt a different way. Maybe.

thisisnotmocking's picture

It's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission. These effers seem to live and die by that mantra.

young_stepmomma25's picture

I love this & yes I could tell as I am not liking him or this decision at the moment. His daughter already is lacking common sense & this just fueled it. Now his son (whom is a year younger) felt a way with this & he's mad he couldn't stay home. Yeah, I picked a winner.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

I agree with Annith. This isn't 1923 and it's unacceptable to shove childcare responsibilities onto another child. Why didn't you speak up and object?

young_stepmomma25's picture

Trust me I did, really. His retort was a bit sad yet pathetic to the point where I just caved in & said "oh well."

notasm3's picture

"Hes got grandkids older than his children??? Wow. Just wow. Not being rude. Just can't wrap my head around that one."

Really? Both my grandmother and my husband's grandmother had grandkids older their children. And nobody was having babies as a teen. And both of these were in long-term marriages to one man.
So
One of my friends had children almost 20 years apart. She laughed and said she always had to explain to people that "no it was not a second marriage - just second child with same man years apart." She married her first and only husband after college too. She did not "breed early and often." She had one at 21 and one at 40. Most of us back then graduated from college at 20. No six year plan for college back then.

I know another couple who tried for years to have children and finally adopted two children in their mid 20s. At age 47 they ended up with a surprise pregnancy - and were delighted. Sometimes life just happens.

Just because it's not for you doesn't make it weird and unbelievable.

notasm3's picture

Not really when there are second marriages/relationships. Many women in second marriages choose to have children in their 40s. If they had a child in an early marriage (or were one of those teens breeding like rabbits these days)they could easily be a grandmother before having their last child.

I got my MBA from a (probably the) top business school. Many of my female classmates who were in their 30s chose to focus on a career and had their children either near 40 or just after. Some had children at an earlier age or married someone with children who were older so had grandkids before their last child.

Sure all too many teen moms end up without a great future but many hunker down and make a life for themselves. A classmate of some young people that I knew at Harvard (class of 2010 so not that old) had a child that she brought to school with her. She could easily be a grandmother before 40 and have a child after that.

thisisnotmocking's picture

My xmil and her mother were pregnant together. Both had girls. They're only weeks apart.

My brother has 2 boys, stb22 & stb1 LOL

My granddaughter is the same age as my brother's youngest.

I make fun of my brother all the time.