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How many are there? A "mini" poll....

Nise's picture

I guess I didn’t realize how many of “us” there were here? How many are pregnant (so far I’m counting 3 Caitlin, Skye22 & Sweetthing) or Trying To Conceive (TTC) or in our case plan to start trying REAL soon?

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sheila's picture

i'm not pg, but i noticed the same thing...lots of members here are. must have been a long summer! lol

Dawn-Moderator's picture

I'm too old!! I'm 38, almost 39. I don't think I could handle a baby and stepson full time!

Dawn

Nise's picture

Kinda funny that you say that Dawn....a co-worker (who became a dear friend) just found out she was pregnant a few months ago shortly after her 39th birthday! Her oldest is halfway though his first year of college and her daughter is a freshman in High School so obviously it was an “oops” baby…At first her reaction was “how am I going to handle this?” b/c she is not married or living with the father, but she is getting excited (heard the heart beat the other day) and I am SO EXCITED too…I cannot wait! But that is what she kept saying, I’ll be 40 with a new born! LOL!

Make a GREAT Day!

Candice's picture

without my dreams of becoming a mother! I have so many things to be grateful for, but had I not became a mother, I would have had such an empty void in my life.

With that said, originally my dh and I agreed that we would have 2 kids (mostly me telling him if you want to marry me you will promise me 2 kids! ha ha), and after we had our son...I actually changed my mind. We have ss (13) and our son (almost 2), and having a child (newborn in particular) gave me realization about how taxing pregnancy is on your body, and how much sleep you lose for the next 2 years, hopefully not 3 years! Plus being business owners, we don't always have "sick" leave...

We have had such a great time with having a child between us. Part of me is sad b/c our son won't have a sibling closer in age, and in some ways I feel like we are depriving him, however, I can't see overwhelming both my dh and myself both physically and financially (daycare alone is $724 for just one...$1400 for two). I just hope I don't regret it!!!!

I had my son at 30, and I am a fitness buff, it took me 9 months to fit back into my jeans, 15 months to lose all the baby fat, and I'm still working on the glutnessous stomach pregnancy leaves behing. It is hard on you emotionally what pregnancy can do to your body, I have a wonderful, healthy, beautiful baby, and all my pg body tracks are worth it, but it doesn't mean you still don't struggle from time to time about body image.

OldTimer's picture

Sadly, because of my DH's cs/cc issues, it will never happen for me. He has two from two different women, and both are just "financial burdens" to him. (Not saying he doesn't love his children, he does, and he is a GREAT dad!) We just simply can't afford it. Plus I have medical issues where it would be very hard for natural conception to take place. So, no "accidents" here.

I think what sealed my fate was because BM1 is extremely mental, and when BM2 came knocking on the door with a 9 month old baby on her hip... he had no idea he fathered a baby and she didn't bother to try to contact him when she found out. Instead, she tried to pass the child off on to someone else, and when she was born... uh oh, that's not my baby. By this point, we had met, then by the time she came around, we were already commented to each other. Had BM2 not come around, I might have had a chance. So, if it happens, great, but I'm not counting on it.

Nise's picture

I don’t recall, how old are the kids? (CS isn't forever and that is a blessing in and of itself!) My husband also has two girls/two moms and I understand where you are coming from…although cs for him is not too much of a strain (though a pain at times….). Speaking from experience, if you want it, really want it, don’t loose hope/faith b/c the Lord works in mysterious ways!

Make a GREAT Day!

OldTimer's picture

SS is 10 and SD is 6... just getting started with cs for her. I quit working a year ago. So, financially, we can't afford it. We're barely making the ends meet right now, and I'm still in such financial dept from my ex, that I'm too nervious to even bother bring up the subject to him. In fact, he gets pretty adamant about the subject. DH doesn't want anymore, so no matter what, I don't think it will happen. He is totally focused on his son right now and just starting to form a relationship with his daughter that adding my wants and needs into the mix is just too much. I'm very very thankful and happy that he even took the step to remarry after having a horrible divorce. He was pretty adamant about not getting married for a long time, but 5 years later... here we are- husband and wife. ;0)

I don't talk about it much because I don't think he understands or is willing to listen, so I figure to do the best I can and be the best stepmom I can. SS is very much my son too...as much as that irriates BM. lol

I am hopeful, and I do pray. I have had some very realistic dreams about being pregnant, I tried to tell my DH about it once, but I didn't have the heart to completely tell him everything that happened. It's just a rough time for us right now. But the reality is that I know it won't happen.

Anne 8102's picture

Yep, I'm there and I'm only 36! Hot flashes, night sweats... you name the symptom, I've got it. Apparently, it happened a little early for me. (Gee, thanks.) We decided after our 3yo that we were done, so I don't mind too much. We have five kids total and that's more than enough for me. I'm not crazy about the crazy hormonal crap I'm dealing with, but I am SOOOOO loving the two-day long period! Woo hoo!

~ Anne ~

P.S. Congrats to the mamas-to-be! Enjoy this time and don't let anything suck the fun out of it. It can be the happiest time of your life.

Candice's picture

now normally I would not have EVER endorsed this author...she has endorsed real "gimmicks" in the past, however, a friend of mine read the book and has followed some of her advise in it. The book is "Ageless" by Suanne Somers. My friend is mid-40's and was experience perimenopause, and went and had her blood work done for bio-identical hormones (these are natural not to be confused with synthetic that acutally cause cancer). She has her hormones back at a level of which a 35 year old not experience perimenopause is at, and she has a normal period.

I would have never bought the book myself, but when my friend really recommended it, I did, and I can't put it down! The information is so interesting, and I had no idea what women go through during perimenopause. I'm only on chapter 4 so far.

Candice's picture

I don't think that there is anything wrong with people who choose not to have children..in fact I highly respect those who have the intuition to "know" that they don't want children, and never regret it. Or in your case, you have come to terms with your marriage that more children are not an option.

Children bring so many joys to one persons life, but..they come at a huge expense (daycare, diapers, formula, clothes very often, sleep...not to mention the fun stuff you want to buy for them).

I really admire individuals that take pride in themselves and know that they just don't have the desire to raise children, or know that additional children will be overwhelming.

You are not chopped liver...you are a loving wife, a loving step-mother, friend, colleague, I'm guessing you have a career and hobbies..you don't have to be a bm to have a reason to live..:)

sheila's picture

on perimenopause.....The Change Before the Change. It's awesome.

happy's picture

To have my husbands baby.. Trust me.. If it happened i would cry and be happy but then again I am looking forward to 41 when my daughter will be 20 and my son will be 18.. SK will be 31 and 25.. My husband would die if I ever got pregnant.. Because he is 9 years older then me.. Him and the ex got fixed when they were going thru there divorce.. Besides that I have two a boy and girl and I know I can always take care of my babies..
My mom had 5 kids- with 3 different men and to tell you the truth shuffling the two I have with my ex is enough..

sweetthing's picture

until I got pregnant the first time. I turned 38 in August and until I met DH I had never tried to have a baby.( My ex didn't want children, but each year told me next year we could have one) For the last year and a half I have had spotting issues ect and was completely delighted when I got pregnant the first time we tried.

I guess what they say about 40 being the new 30 is a crock. When I went to one GYN who made conception sound impossible again on my own, she told me it doesn't apply to reproduction.

It's funny because I look & feel better in my mid to late 30's than I did in my 20's.

lovin-life's picture

I'll be 42 next birthday....and hubby is 50. So we'll pass on the having babies together thing. But I am happy for all of you who are...it is a very exciting place to be in your life! Congrates to all!!! Smile