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Yup...her birthday is in a week!

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

DH says that HHB is all of a sudden being super nice to him...answering his texts, having conversations with him. I told him, "Of course, she is! Her birthday is in a week! Remember, she was being all super sweet before Christmas, too. She is laying it on to bank on a gift!" Day said that she hadn't even mentioned anything she wants. I told him that is because she wants cash, and figures if she doesn't tell DH what she wants, he will just hand her $100 or something! I told him to just get her a $50 gift card, and that should be it. I reminded him that she has treated him like he doesn't exist for 2 months now. Want better gifts? Try to actually have a relationship with the person, and don't only call when you want something!

On another note, they moved this weekend, and ended up moving HHB schools. This means that she is currently not on a color guard squad, because she has to wait until tryouts for marching season. Guess she will have plenty of time to do that community service she hasn't even started yet! Oh, and actually do her school work! Oh, wait...never mind. New school, new teachers who don't know about how she went crying to all of her teachers to change her grade last period! She will not do her work, and then lay on some sob story to get these new teachers to change her grades! I just at hope she doesn't try to mess things up for my niece, who goes to the same school! My niece is not happy with HHB...they have been pretty close their whole lives, but when HHB pulled her crap back in December, she dropped my niece like a bad habit...HHB has been ignoring her texts like she has been ignoring my MIL.

But it seems that HHB is still leading on emo based on some posts made by emo this past weekend on HHB's Facebook. Emo girlfriend is under the impression they are not broken up, just being kept apart. And now that HHB moved and is going to the school Emo should be going to (emo quit and started doing one of those online programs), emo is now wanted to go back to school!

Things should be interesting!! And yes, I'm making DH stick to a birthday gift of $50 or less, and im not helping him get it! He is perfectly capable of going to the grocery store and getting a gift card! She hasn't so much as acknowledged my existence since she moved out!

thebrokenrecordmachine's picture

It is quite "funny" that when Birthdays or Christmas Rolls around how suddenly Skids want to see their parents otherwise they couldnt care less...I saw thru what SD was doing this past december(her birthday is in december and christmas, using SO's December birthday as a means to come down)...but anyways, she didnt make the trip up as we have no room in our rental at the moment.
At least you are giving her $50- thats our limit, we give your mother enough money(sorry for sounding like a gold digger)- he keeps skids on health insurance and other stuff so its more than just CS, plus BM took SO back to court for an increase in 2014 but to her dismay she was denied....skids became distant...better for me.
Well I hope your SO sees thru his kids, I got a good chuckle when SO referred to his children as "little Spies" a few weeks ago it nearly knocked me off my chair...really hope your SO sees thru the BS!

goingslowlycrazy's picture

I agree with all this.. My skids don't give their father the time if day unless they want something..on birthdays we have to provide parties and gifts...the bm gets away with next to nothing..can you all give me some tips on disengaging? I really need to do it but subtly so he doesn't think I hate them, I really laughed last night..we were discussing his shitty past with the skank..and he said..well does that mean my kids remind you of my past? Well duh...men really are stupid. Seriously I need some help, I always go halves on the parties and the gifts...and I don't want to..I want to pull back a bit..Any ideas?

goingslowlycrazy's picture

I like the sound of that, I conveniently forgot my purse last weekend.. Lol and I just sit back and let him pay..like someone said,, not my mum keys not my zoo..he doesn't pay for anything for my daughter..the sd7 bday is coming up..let's see how much that costs him and how well he does organising..I'm stepping right back..last year I bought and sent invites..organised the whole thing and paid for most of it..not again

goingslowlycrazy's picture

Ha ha hilarious..yes I have ss 16 here in the home and sd7 and ss8 and ss13. Plus bd who doesn't live with us..you are so right.. I will say all of that..it's my daughters 21st this year..unfortunately after my bd..but he wouldn't even think of offering to contribute..I will just step away...

Jsmom's picture

I love my DH, he doesn't buy SD18 nothing since her alienation. Nothing since Christmas two years ago and I picked up a couple small things. Before that it was a couple small gifts. BM recommended he buy her stuff to help their relationship early on when the lawsuit started, he told her no, he was not buying a child. He never really has. If they saw each other from time to time, he would get something small. But, no cash, since that would probably be used for pot.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

I know $50 is pretty generous...to most. When it comes to DH and HHB? Well, DH thinks it isn't enough...he thinks he should give her $100-$200 cash...it' a birthday! He has always given her some electronic or tried to get the most expensive thing on her list. He has in the past always played into the game of trying to buy HHB's affection at Christmas and on birthdays by out-doing BM.

Which brings me to HHB. She will see $50 as an insult, for sure. I mean, it is her 16th birthday!!! Shouldn't DH be planning some grand Sweet 16 party and all like the girls on that show on MTV? $50? At the stores that HHB PREFERS to shop at, that won't buy squat! One makeup item, one item of clothing. Remember, this is the Sephora/Pac Sun/designer everything girl! She doesn't like clothing at stores like Forever 21, H&M, Rue21...and she if she gets clothing at Hot Topic, it has to be the expensive stuff...Tripp, Lip Service...otherwise, she just goes for accessories and hair color.

I also have to ward off having it thrown in my face that we bought BD24 a Nintendo DS for her birthday. Big difference...for the last 5 years, BD24 has gotten small presents, and never really asked for anything for her birthday or Christmas. She works her butt off to pay her bills, and usually when I ask her what she needs or wants around these days, she says clothes. She also calls often...once a week, to be exact...just to talk and will talk for more than an hour if you let her...about whatever silly stuff. She is investing in a relationship with us, so when she saw something she really wanted and couldn't afford, yeah, I thought it would be nice to get it for her. Same with BS20...if there is something would like and I can afford to get it for his birthday or Christmas, I will get it for him, because he invests in a relationship and does the right thing.

HHB simply will not invest in a relationship! She thinks it is okay to treat DH like crap the other 300+ days of the year, and only be nice to him when "gift time" comes around! Sorry, honey...it does not work like that! Keep it up, and come Christmas, she won't get jack! I'm willing to make bets that after her birthday passes, HHB will go back to being a total b***h to DH instantly...especially since she only got $50, and didn't get something awesome like a new iPhone or something.

Jsmom's picture

What he needs to do, is let her come to him for the gift. He does not reach out in anyway. I do think it is too much, but maybe it shows her how he feels about her behavior.

I would make sure she knows that she can not ignore someone than get a gift. Life doesn't work like that.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Oh, I know she is going to be pissed about $50, and that is the point! DH will see her for the entitled bitch she is when it is all over! I'm waiting for the call from BM..."Is that ALL you are getting her? Seriously?" Of course, it is easy to believe and convince HHB that she is entitled to much more when you aren't the one actually paying for anything. Wonder what BM will be "getting her"...or in other words, will be convincing her husband to buy for her. Or maybe that is why she is already being a b***h about the child support, even though it isn't due until the 10th! Yeah, BM is already calling DH b***hing at him about giving her the child support, even though he already told her that he gets paid on Friday, and that is when she will get it. Yeah, there is still money in the bank...MY money, and I'm surely not going to front the child support to him just so that she can get her way!

I will not be going with DH to give HHB her gift. I do agree with what some have said, he should make HHB come to him to get it, but she won't, and DH will just take it too her regardless of what I say about it. I do wish I could be a fly on the wall while he is there and after he leaves. HHB will put on an act...like she is happy he gave her some money while her eyes will say, "Are you f**king kidding me? That's it?" After DH leaves, she will gripe to BM and/or her friends about how all her dad gave her for her birthday was a measly $50, and that is proof that he doesn't care, etc. Just like the color guard necklace he got her for Christmas...you look at all the pictures she posts, and she isn't ever wearing it. No, but she is wearing that $5 piece of crap choker thing that she got at Hot Topic in EVERY picture! The camera he got her a few Christmases ago when HHB begged for a camera? It's still here. Oh, it wasn't the $3000 one she wanted, but a $200 one for her to prove she was really into photography and could take care of it. Ungrateful brat!

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

I know, right? Oh, how I wish I could clean out that room, fumigate it, and turn it into something else. DH will not allow it...yet. Keep praying that HHB will continue to refuse to come to our house, and DH will finally see that it is wasted space! And to think, this time last year he was trying to convince me to give HHB BS20's room when he left for school! "He's hardly going to be here!" Yeah, well it seems that even with him off at college he spends more time in this house than HHB will now! He was home for a week for Thanksgiving, a month for winter break...he will be here a week for spring break, and then 2 1/2 months for summer!

Aniki's picture

Does he know the camera is still there? Sell it and play innocent. Nothing would stop me from fumigating that room and "tidying" up. Easiest to box up her things so she can sort through and decide what she keeps/tosses "when" she comes back.

Calypso1977's picture

can you convince him to let you fumugate and clean it anyway? if she ever sleeps in there again it would most likely only be for one or two nights. you can then tell him you are enacting STRICT no-food rules, and force her to throw out any trash, etc. after each overnight so as to not allow the room to return to its current disgusting state.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

LOL...that would be if she could get a license before she is 18! Her little incident back in January has ruined her ability to get a license or drive until then. I still like the idea of getting a card with a car on it, and writing on the inside, "Here's $50 toward your fines or what you owe emo's parents for the damage you did driving their daughter's car without a license!"