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What do your spouses think of this site?

grayskies's picture

hi everyone, this is my first post. i'm curious to know if you share this site with your spouses. when i found it, i was over-freakin-joyed to find people in similar situations dealing with the same stuff i am. i felt so alone, and told my dh so. i have a sd18 and ss16, and ss lives with us. sd has been banned from our home, due to stealing, lying, breaking our stuff...much of the same i see on here. it took SO MUCH for dh to realize all of what was happening, and it continues on a lesser scale with ss. when i address skid issues with dh, he turns into guilt-parent (wonderful term, btw, never knew what it was called, just what it felt like) and says "they've had a rough life" (no), or "when you complain about their behavior, its like youre saying i'm a bad parent". i wanted to keep this little gem of a site all to myself, but then its really really helpful to be able to say to him "see? its not all me, i'm not a control freak, i just want ss to take a shower more than once a week!!" he encourages me to get on here if i need support, but then says he feels bad about it, too. like he's a failure at parenting, since i'm here. this is a wonderful wonderful man, btw, who is very kind and loving to me, he just cannot see that some guidelines for these kids are in order. thank you thank you all of you....

Purpleflower09's picture

My spouse does not know...this site is for ME and MY SANITY and for me to network with other like minded step parents and to get advice from more experienced step parents. Sometimes we as step parents need something away and separate from our husbands/wives and step kids. We need to vent to eachother and support eachother..and give advice without criticism and that is something most of us don't get at home. When I found this site not long ago, I thought i was in heaven. So welcome. Alot of really intelligent and informed step parents on here with excellent advice.

Purpleflower

DewyCox's picture

Like Purpleflower, I keep it to myself and just read alone, suddenly life ain't so bad anymore, makes you think "hey, it could've been lot worse!"

Storm76's picture

My OH doesn't know I come on here - in fact I only log on at work so there's no trace on the home computer. It's not that I'm ashamed of what I write here, or that I don't want him to know what I'm thinking, it's more that I want a private place to vent, and talking to people who are in the same position I am - in the same way I don't know what it's like to be a parent, he doesn't know what it's like to be a step-parent.

Angel72's picture

My spouse knows i post on this site but he's not crazy about it. Not because of the site but because he's a private person and doens't share info with anyone, not even family. So its a privacy issue. But i never tell all the details or names etc....etc...

sadstepmom26's picture

My DH doesnt know and I dont plan on telling him about it. Like purple flower and the others, I use this as a place to vent and just get some help and support.
Life is what you make it.

buttercup123's picture

My fiance thinks it's great. Now I can vent to someone other than him. Lol.
He likes the support factor. It's nice to know that others are going through the same things that you are. It keeps my sanity intact.

Stepmomtogirls's picture

DF doesn't know about this site, it's my place to vent (bitch) about HIS kids, lol. I don't know how he would take to it.

EPMom's picture

My dh knows about this site, and will be introduced to it for the first time this weekend. I'm excited and so is he. Smile