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Watch that social media, dads!

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

SD15 got her internet back Saturday after being grounded from it for 2 weeks, so I decided to check today, out of curiosity, what SD15 posted to Facebook and Instagram since getting her internet back! What I saw should have DH concerned...and he needs to be regularly checking SD15's social media and nipping things in the bud ASAP!

Now, SD15 is pretty stuck on herself already...always posting selfies with tall the angles and filters, and some sort of comments/tags about "only pretty girls", etc. Well, on her Intagram, I see a post about following a page called "nothingbutbeautifulgirls"...it is the kind of post that looks like SD15 is trying to get followed/posted by this page. Problem is, it looks like a total pedo/perv page!! There are a bunch of pictures of girls...many with hardly any clothing on, and posts saying to go follow this girl and that girl! The page has over 14,000 followers! SD15's picture is not yet up on that page, but I'm sure it is a matter of time...follow me/tag me/follow you...the way that stuff works today. Let's just say it looks like something that can get out of control really quick!

Why don't these dad's keep an eye on their precious princesses on social media? I mean, seriously!!! If I had a say, there would definitely be some guidelines and rules about the social media, and if she didn't follow...bye bye access! She wasn't even supposed to have an Instagram, but she did it behind DH's back, and DH just gave her a talking to and let her keep it! Free expression? Come on!!! These are underage girls we are talking about here giving every perv in the world "pleasure" material on the internet! Even if they aren't naked pictures...posting pictures in bikinis, crop tops, camis (which is the top of choice in several of SD15's pictures)...the pouty eyes and such?

frustratedstepdad's picture

You or DH needs to ask one of your friends who is knowledgeable about computers to help you.

When SD24's boyfriend went to prison, we noticed that she would send him money through s certain website. I made it so whenever she tried to go to that website, it would take her to monster.com instead of that webpage. I've also blocked access to plenty of other websites from our computer too.

Our other SD's used to have a bad habit of bringing their kids over to our house, and then spending the whole time on Facebook while we ended up watching the kids. I put an end to that quickly.

If you don't have a buddy who is good at it, ask your internet service provider. They can help you with this as well.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

Both DH and I are in IT...we know our way the computers. Problem is, he has his head in the sand! I told him a couple of years ago that I though her having unsupervised internet usage was not a good idea. We have a desktop computer set up in the TV room for the kids to use, but SD15 doesn't like this idea. She's been allowed to have her tablets and iPods on the internet...really, really bad idea. There is NO WAY to really monitor her activity...well, we used to have OpenDNS set up when BD23 was at home, and could see what web sites were visited from our house, lock out things, etc. But for some reason, DH didn't like it and killed it. Even still, we still had access to BD23's computer when she wasn't home if we had any reason to suspect anything, as we didn't give her the admin password and stuff. No access to the iPod or tablet....she takes them with her! Only time DH has access is if something is broken, and she begs DH to fix it. DH will find things on her device that he doesn't approve of...like SnapChat!...and tells her to remove them! No, he doesn't remove himself, he tells her to remove them! She doesn't do it.

I don't even want to think about what she may have shared on SnapChat!

Poodle's picture

That's why some dads don't interfere though isn't it? They're terrified at having to look at sexy pics of their own daughters. This is usually the point where moms step in hard. I don't know how blended you are but to me it's an issue of the security of the whole family. I would simply tell the girl she is making not only herself but her whole family a target and then refuse to allow use of any screen in the house. If she does it outside, what can you do.
I did this with SS22 when I found he was doing private browsing on our computers and had a fake ID which subscribed to paid porn sites. I didn't have an issue with him doing this in his own time and space -- what's it to me? -- but I was not having any of it spilling over onto my sons.
His sisters still put their personal cell numbers on their FB and advertise when they are home alone. I'm disengaged so, again, nothing to me personally.

CantKeepDoingThis's picture

I've had to pretty much disengage, too. I basically look at the sites to make sure she isn't posting things that would harm our family...as she has this habit of lying and such. If I see something that is very concerning, like this, I will bring it to DH's attention...but it usually just gets a "talk" and SD15 does what she wants anyway. Wonder what SD15's grades and such will be like next year without me logging into the district site? With BS19 graduating, I will no longer have any need to log into it, meaning I won't be scrolling through her grades to get to his (they are on the same page, and since her name comes before his in the alphabet).

I suspect things will go downhill fast next school year!! Yeah, she has gotten into some trouble this year, but for the most part, she has been worried about BS19 telling us what is going on, and many of the questionable kids are afraid to hang around her because they are afraid of BS19 (let's just say he was just awarded the defensive lineman award last week for this past football season)...he and his friends are everywhere, and his friends are sure to tell everything. Since they are all graduating, I could see her easily trying to get away with more.

Part of me is actually happy that she only uses an iPod and tablet...more difficult to illegally download music and stuff...THAT could get you in serious trouble! I've heard of people getting fined heavily for their kids' activity.