Step
Hello:
I have a 14 year old stepdaughter. I met her when she was 9, and married her mom at 12. She‘s been calling me Daddy since 13. Her father is barely in her life. Anyway, around four months ago she began becoming increasingly affectionate with me, such as wanting to cuddle on the couch while watching movies. Likewise, she’s made comments like how she would have dated me back in the day. She likes to walk with arms interlaced with mine even when her mom is with us. Mom jokes that sometimes it makes her look like the 3rd wheel. I’ve talked to her mom about all of this and she just seems to think that her daughter loves me and appreciates me stepping up to be a father figure in her life. Most recently though it looks like she’s wanting me to see her in compromised positions. She was in the bathroom with the door open yesterday and I walked by and she had nothing but a robe on with her breasts exposed. Why would she not have the door closed knowing I was nearby. How do I handle this? as wanting to cuddle on the couch while watching movies. Likewise, she’s made comments like how she would have dated me back in the day. She likes to walk with arms interlaced with mine even when her mom is with us. Mom jokes that sometimes it makes her look like the 3rd wheel. I’ve talked to her mom about all of this and she just seems to think that her daughter loves me and appreciates me stepping up to be a father figure in her life. Most recently though it looks like she’s wanting me to see her in compromised positions. She was in the bathroom with the door open yesterday and I walked by and she had nothing but a robe on with her breasts exposed. Why would she not have the door closed knowing I was nearby. How do I handle this?
Tell her mom she is leaving
Tell her mom she is leaving the door open while naked and it makes you uncomfortable “as her dad, I don’t need to see that by accident” this phrase will keep your SO in neutral zone. Also I seriously suggest you get nanny cams or refuse to be left alone from her. She’s obviously into the stage of hormones, dating, etc. and if you make her angry because you don’t see her the way she sees you, she might try to say you touched her inappropriately. Protect yourself. Warn your wife even if it’s just to point out SD doesn’t need to be hanging all over men in general or leaving doors open while she’s dressing.
I would also kindly say that
I would also kindly say that she is too old to be cuddling. And honestly, she is. Even if she were your birth daughter, she would be too old for cuddling. She should start to realize that her plan, whatever that is, is not working. Hopefully she doesn’t turn Into an SD scorned, but either way, you have to set boundaries.
You sternly tell her to cover
You sternly tell her to cover up or keep the door closed then you immediately inform your wife of her behaviors and how you addressed it.
Lather, rinse, repeat.... and WEB cams to cover your ass if she gets cranky at being rejected and makes false accusations.
Hopefully this is nothing more than a free spirited young woman and not a Lolita thing on her part.
It is clear she don't see you
It is clear she don't see you as a father figure. Teenage girls are very sneaky. They became sexually arouses early the teenage boys. They also have a thing for older men. So please be careful and talk to her mother.
You know exactly what is
You know exactly what is going on. You tell her very sternly that she is to cover up at all times. She’s an adolescent who is testing boundaries with her sexuality. Your role is to teach her about boundaries when it comes to her sexuality. It’s not about her being attracted to you.
Yes teens usually practice
Yes teens usually practice flirting and stuff with people they feel safe with such as teachers. It is a common thing. You can find it in nearly every single middle school and high school. And I am sure you can also remember back to your school days of "those girls" or "those boys" that always flirted with "that teacher." It is because these safe people such as teachers and stepparents or friends's parents will either ignore it or gently steer them in a different direction. Hopefully they wouldn't be successful but there are always the occasional student-teacher relationships or stepson-stepmom creep story out there.
Op know that it is 'noraml' hormonal puberty and understand your place in this stage is to teach her it what is NOT appropriate i.e. being seen half naked by her mom's husband; cozing up to older men, etc...
When SD26 was about 10 I was
When SD26 was about 10 I was sending her to bed and she kissed me goodnight in a more than normal way, nothing gross but it was pushing the boundary, I immediately told my DW and it never happened again, I actually can't remember if DW spoke to her of she just never tried again, thank gawd !