SS14 going on 4
Question for the group... from what I've read there are many immature skids... my SS14 is bad. He acts like a toddler and, in fact, seeks DD2 out as his playmate. He takes no initiative socially with peers his own age and follows DH around like a lost puppy waiting for him to occupy his time. Stage 5 clinger.
DH is a recovering Disney dad who, at times, has slip ups rooted in guilt. I feel these slips only reinforce SS to act the way he does.
What works? Shame? Being direct? Ignoring him? There are no MH issues in play (he's been evaluated, sees a therapist, etc.) BM is also an adult child so I'm afraid many of his behaviors have been learned, and even reinforced when he is with her. AKA act like a helpless, ditsy ass to get their needs met.... I have disengaged and essentially just ignore him... the problem is that when he's with us he is ALWAYS around.
DH and I can't even go to the grocery store without this kid wanting to tag along as that is the hilight of his day... I guess my question is, what (if anything) can I do to get this kid to grow up and act a bit closer to 14 than 4? DH contradicts himself swaying between "this is just his personality" and "give it time and he will grow out of it." I definitely need some advice guys otherwise this will be the summer from hell...
Thank you in advance