So mad right now...
...there must be steam coming out of my ears like in the cartoons!
There was a problem with the yearbook orders for last year. They didn't get delivered before the end of school like they were supposed to. Since BS19 is off at college, I was trying to figure out in my schedule when I could go pick it up for him. I only got BS19 a yearbook, because with my bios, we NEVER bought them a year book other than their senior year. Well, SheSloth was whining that she really wanted one, but she was told no. Again, she can wait until her senior year like the other two...she wasn't going to get different treatment.
So, I get an email from the school that they are in, and I was telling DH I needed to figure out how to go get it. I asked him if it would be possible for him to swing by the office since he is already at the school EVERY morning dropping off SheSloth. Instead of doing it himself, he asked SheSloth to go get it! I was not happy when I found this out! I've asked SheSloth a few times about it, and she has claimed every time that she still has not gone by the office to pick up BS19's year book. Well, I finally get a morning I can go by to get it myself, and I'm told by the lady in the office that SheSloth came by and picked up the yearbook some time ago...that she had actually called SheSloth to the office to get it, and she showed me where SheSloth signed for the book!
I call DH and ask him if SheSloth said anything to him about the yearbook. He said he hasn't heard a word. I tell him, "Well, she picked it up! So where is it?" He tried to calm me down and say that I need to work it out with her this evening. I tell him, "I hope she hasn't decided to keep it for herself!" He seemed put off that I would even suggest this! Really? "She wouldn't do that. Maybe she is just holding on to hit so that she could give it to her brother herself. That would be something she would do." WTH? You really believe that crap? I then tell him, "Then why the hell would she have lied to me about not having it? I've asked her several times, even very recently, and every time she tells me she hasn't picked it up yet!"
So, I didn't get to put it into the package I was sending to BS19, and this did not make me happy. I needed to get the package out ASAP, as it has gotten rather cold where he is at, and I needed to get some sweatpants to him quickly (being a football player, he has difficulty with jeans, and I'm sure with the training he has been doing, the jeans he took with him aren't fitting right any longer...thighs too big). So, no...couldn't wait until after this evening, otherwise he would not get the package until Monday, instead of Friday which is when he will get it because I sent it this morning. When I got home, I took a quick look in her room, it isn't where I can see it laying around. I'm just waiting for the "Oh, I keep forgetting to give it to you" excuse...but if it is in her bag, how can she forget? I mean, she would have to see it every single day! I'm also afraid that if she has been carrying it around in her bag, it is now damaged. I have no way of replacing that yearbook if she has screwed this up. It is NOT her property, and she should have handed it over ASAP after getting it! I don't care that DH doesn't believe she would have kept it for herself. The way she was whining about it? I could easily see her doing that! She is not the innocent little princess DH thinks she is, and I'm tired of him believing her to be such all the time. He needs to get his freakin' head out of the sand! Serious...the ONLY time I've ever agreed with anything BM has ever said was the day she told DH that he trusts SheSloth too much! She should know better than he does how likely she is to lie! The girl has spent more of her life with the woman. If the girl was this perfect little angel, BM wouldn't have sent her to us claiming she can't deal with it any longer!
Oh...I plan on it! That thing
Oh...I plan on it! That thing wasn't cheap! Yearbooks run $50 these days. BS19 really wanted his senior yearbook, too. Like I said...bios only got them for their senior years, but only if they wanted it. BS19 made it very clear he wanted his senior yearbook (some kids just aren't into that kind of thing, but it was a big deal to him). There better not be any damage to that thing when I get it in my hands! If it is damaged, she still will not be allowed to keep it...I don't care what DH says! I will hold on to it for myself if I have to if she had her little friends write in it!
Oh, and here is the thing that is really suspicious. I texted her asking where the yearbook was 2 1/2 hours ago. Yes, her phone is locked down during school hours, but she can still receive texts from and send texts to those on her "allowed" list during lock down....and my number is on her "allowed" list. I'm sure she will have some excuse for not responding to me at all..."Oh, since my phone is on lock down, I don't even look at it in school anymore." This I know is bull! So the fact she hasn't responded with ANYTHING tells me something is up...like "Oh crap...she knows I have it! Um, what do I do now?"
Tried that...they called her
Tried that...they called her to the office, but she didn't come, and that is all they would allow. Unless it is an emergency, they will not allow you to go disturb class. I don't think that is right, but still, I AM fricking livid!
Of course, DH will not see it as stealing, and I'm probably already the bad guy for even suggesting that SheSloth took it on purpose. He is convinced in his mind that she just forgot to give it to me, or that she is holding it to give to BS19 herself when he comes home as some "sweet gesture"..."Look, I got your yearbook for you!" Considering they were never really close, I call B.S.! Though I hope there is no writing in it, if there isn't, then it will further paint me as the bad guy...and I can already see the fight..."You NEVER trust her...you ALWAYS think she is lying!" How about the fact that she has been in possession of it, and hasn't turned it over, KNOWING that I was concerned about it and wanted to get it to BS19! No, he won't consider that at all! And THAT makes me even more furious, knowing that there will be an argument between DH and I over this no matter what the outcome is!
I would have to look into
I would have to look into that, but I can promise you that it would have to come out of my pocket. DH doesn't have the extra money for it, and SheSloth SURELY doesn't have the money for it...she doesn't even do her chores, so I can't even make her work it off! I mean, when SheSloth whined about not getting one in the first place, I told DH on the side, "If you really think she should have one, the YOU find the money, and YOU order it. I'm not ordering her one, as I'm not going to treat her different than my bios!" Notice...he never ordered her one, so he must have not though it that important at the time. But like I said above, regardless of how this turns out, I will be the bad guy! If she did have her friends write in it, she will get a "talking to", and I will get griped at for not simply ordering her one in the first place.
Yeah...that won't work. I
Yeah...that won't work. I won't let her have data on her phone. We are on shared data, and I don't trust her to stop at a certain amount. I wasn't about to have her use it all up with stupid boob-selfies and pictures of her flipping off the camera to her Instagram, so I've stood my ground on the data stuff. DH has always tried to argue, "Just tell her not to go past X, and she won't." I always respond, "Oh, you mean like you telling her not to have her phone in the bathroom with her when she is showering, and she does it anyway? Or how you have told her to keep showers to 15 minutes, and she still stays in there 45 minutes to an hour? Oh, wait, you mean like you tell her to clean up after herself and she never does!" Yeah, after I say something like that, the data plan issue gets promptly dropped!
"I bet you never see it
"I bet you never see it because she keeps it all school."
One advantage is that they don't have lockers at her school. Didn't understand why they didn't put them in when they built the school, but they basically make the kids carry all their stuff with them all day. They keep the books in the classroom, and for classes where they may need one to do homework, they give a login to the online book, or can send a book home with the student on request if they say they don't have a computer or internet. Guess it saves money not having to deal with all those damaged books, and trying to get parents to pay for them. They also no longer have to deal with the old "Oh, I forgot my book at home/in my locker".
Dear SheSloth ~ Merry Xmas
Dear SheSloth ~
Merry Xmas
Present 100.00
( replacing my sons senior yearbook)
-100.00
------------------
Zero ~ nada goose egg
Priceless
Oh...believe me...it's
Oh...believe me...it's already going to be a slim Christmas! She's not getting anything big! It may have to be one of those disappointing Christmases where she gets things she "needs". I'm almost tempted to get her nothing but underwear (see other posts about not washing or wiping)!
Yes yes yes !!! Toilet paper
Yes yes yes !!! Toilet paper as well !!!
Merry Xmas !!!
She doesn't WIPE. No need
She doesn't WIPE. No need for TP lol.
Yup...buying TP for her would
Yup...buying TP for her would be a total waste! I could buy her some feminine wash...hint hint clue clue.
I have a great idea ~ Put
I have a great idea ~
Put plastic wrap around the underneath of her toilet seat and then put the seat down.
And take the toilet paper out of her bathroom.
Awwwww sweet revenge ~ that will make you laugh.
Oh...I explained it to them,
Oh...I explained it to them, but they still insisted there wasn't much they could do. I guess at this point they see it as a personal home problem, and they won't get involved. Their process is to allow younger siblings to pick stuff up for students that no longer are at the school, and once handed over, it is not their problem if the sibling does not hand over the item to the parents or the one who is the rightful owner of the property.
LOL@Easy...remember, she
LOL@Easy...remember, she doesn't use toilet paper!
So, DH just called and asked if I ever talked to SheSloth. Last I got off the phone with him, I was waiting for her to see if she would come to the office after they called her. I told him she never came to the office. I also told him that I texted her asking where it was, and she never replied. I then pointed out that if she tried the "oh, I keep forgetting to give it to you" excuse, I'm not buying it...that if it is in her bag, she sees it every day. He said that she seems to be using a different bag every day, so he doubts if it is in her bag. He asked if maybe she put it on BS19's bed for him (as I have not gotten a lock on that door yet...but after this, that will be a priority this weekend). I told him I already checked there first thing I got home, and it wasn't there. All he could say after that was, "Hmmmm...strange...I don't know."
I again pointed out that I asked about it several times, and knowing how concerned I was about it, why hasn't she given it to me. I told him yet again that the lady in the office said she called SheSloth down some time ago to get the yearbook, and the name next to BS19's name on the paper was SheSloth's handwriting! Trying not to create a huge fight, and making it sound like I'm giving the benefit of a doubt (which I'm certain he saw right through), I said, "Look...even if she 'forgot', I'm getting really tired of this 'forgetting' and not paying attention! This is B.S. Bottom line is she has it and it isn't hers!" I went on to tell DH that I'm really upset about this. I tried to surprise BS19...this morning thinking, "Hey...I have a free morning! I'm going to go get the book and put it in his package and he will be surprised when he opens the box and sees it." Only, I get the school and find out SheSloth has it, and hasn't bothered to give it to me? So, I really think he gets the message at this point that I am more than upset over the situation. It is one thing to "forget" a date or time that she is supposed to be somewhere causing DH to totally change his plans or fall short of other commitments. It is quite another to "forget" to hand over property that is not yours! Shoot, Lindsay Lohan served how many years probation because she "forgot" to return a necklace?
I wonder if it will
I wonder if it will miraculously appear in your sons room under his bed in a closet or drawer.
I'd still do the toilet prank on her n laugh your ass off when she comes out of the bathroom.
She's a Veruca Salt.
He has to stop giving her the benefit of the doubt. She probably has been spinning her wheels with all kinds of lies ~ her friend has it cause she just wanted to look at it.
"He has to stop giving her
"He has to stop giving her the benefit of the doubt."
Exactly! I mean, there was the conversation just a few weeks ago about the pep rally where the lie unraveled right before him, and he didn't really call her on it (when she claimed she only found out about an hour before she told him, but then through the conversation, it was discovered that there was no way that was true, as there THREE activities she was involved in for the pep rally). There was also some other conversation not that long ago that I caught the tail end of as they came home that involved lies...what I gathered was that she told DH she was doing one thing before the game, and ended up doing something else and tried to say that she just 'forgot' to call him with the change in plans. Then, there are all the other amazing stories about all the other trouble she has ever gotten into! The alcohol in her possession in 7th grade..."Oh, I had taken away from my friend and was going to pour it out.", however, on her Facebook private messages there was a discussion with "the friend" the night before where the friend said she was bringing it for them to "relax" before their dance recital, and SheSloth's response was "Hell Ya!!!" Yeah, that really sounds like someone who doesn't believe their friend would actually do it! Or the e-cig toward the end of last school year..."Oh, my friend ______ gave it to me to hold for her." Problem was, that friend doesn't ride her bus...lives miles from us. She got in trouble for having it on the bus in the morning. So, if her friend really gave it to hold for her, that meant it had to happen the day before or earlier, so what was it doing out of SheSloth's purse on the bus? I know, because she was either showing it off or using it! Add to that all the "that's not my mess" or "it wasn't me" lies before BS19 left for college. Oh, that cracker wrapper on the couch is not yours when I saw you eating those crackers earlier, and BS19 doesn't even like them?
This is just a sampling of her lying! So, am I always skeptical? You bet I am!
I don't understand the school
I don't understand the school not getting her out of class. Are you on the list of people allowed to pick her up. If they called down for her, they already interrupted class.
My guess is she did have her friends sign it and thinks DH will allow her to keep it then. If that is the case, I would burn it like someone else said and find some way to make this girl pay for another one for your son. You should be able to get one from the company. My son's friend had someone do damage to his and he was able to get another one. It was the same price.
They've gotten really strange
They've gotten really strange since being in the new school building. They seem to be more stand-offish about this kind of stuff. I'm thinking to many parents got upset for the school getting their kids in trouble for things they felt should have (or should not have) been handled at home.
Oh, and you can bet she will not keep that year book! If she had her little friends write in it or damage it, I will be getting BS19 another one (if it is possible), and use the damaged one to recover any pictures of BS19 in it for his scrapbook! There is no way in hell I will allow her to keep something if I know she stole it. Just like when BS19 was 8 years old. We were at Wal-Mart, and I saw him playing with this keychain when we were in line to check out. I told him to put it down, and then got distracted by having to pay the cashier. Shortly after we get home, I notice BS19 playing with the keychain! I snatched it away from him, loaded him and my daughter back up in the car (BD23 was 12 at the time), and drove my happy butt back up to Wal-Mart! I walked inside, and promptly asked for a manager. I then made BS19 tell the manager what he had done...that he stole something from her store! She gave me a sly wink, and then played it up really good...asking BS19 if she needed to call the police on him for stealing from her. Boy got really scared, and was apologizing to the manager over and over and over again. BS19 never took another thing that wasn't his. Before we left, the manager pulled me close and whispered to me that she was impressed...that she knew that there were a lot of parents these days that wouldn't have done what I did...they would have just let it slide. Sad thing is, what she said was true! I mean, it was an inconvenience for me to go back to the store to return the keychain that was maybe worth $1! I could have just as easily taken it away from BS19, and left it at that, but by taking him back to the store to make him admit what he did and return the item, I drove it home that it was not acceptable behavior to take something that wasn't yours.
It's the only way kids learn.
It's the only way kids learn. You have to TEACH them. Your SD lying just goes to the other blog about lying that is up today. If there aren't serious consequences for it, all the child does is learn to get better at it.
BINGO! No kid is perfect 100%
BINGO! No kid is perfect 100% of their childhood. There will be times that they "test" things. That little white lie to see if it gets them out of trouble, taking something that isn't theirs because they want it, mouthing off to their parents, hitting or biting, etc. It is how we parents respond to these little "tests" that teach them what is considered proper behavior. I think I've said this before...SheSloth has NEVER gotten a spanking that I am aware of. She has always just gotten "a talk"! Her whole life! Both of my bios got spanked...by me! Now, I know there are arguments for both sides of that coin, but bottom line...my bios are not violent psychopaths, nor did they grow up hating me! I still have very close relationships with both of my bios, and they are both hard-working, responsible adults. I didn't spank them for every little thing, but when it called for it, their butt got tanned! Lying was one thing they were sure to get spanked for...I made it very clear from the get go that lying would NOT be tolerated! If you messed up, fess up to it and take responsibility for it...life will be much easier on you.
i cant get past this: "He
i cant get past this:
"He tried to calm me down and say that I need to work it out with her this evening."
why the hell do you need to work anything out with her? you had worked it out with your husband, he was supposed to get it and didnt, now its HIS problem to work it out with Skidmark.
That would be a resounding
That would be a resounding "HELL NO!" He even tries that, it will be a fight!
Guess DH was afraid that I
Guess DH was afraid that I was going to be too hard on SheSloth, because he managed to get out of work and home early today...before she has gotten home from school! He has reason to worry...I'm ticked!! Especially since her phone went on unlock about 45 minutes ago, and I can she that she has sent at least one text to a friend...but she still has not bothered to respond to my "where is your brother's yearbook" text. Can't wait to hear the lies...I mean excuses!
Just waiting for her to walk through that door today...I can feel my blood pressure rising! Part of it is anger, and part of it is feeling she will weasel her way out of yet another situation and making me look like the evil stepmonster who will NEVER EVER trust her. She will put on the innocent face, and talk her way out of it, and DH will be like, "See!"
Hell, lock her phone down
Hell, lock her phone down again for tonight, too. She'll call DH and ask why it isn't working since it's after school. It really sucks that the school policy is for siblings of graduates to take items home. That was the first mistake! I was thinking maybe SheSloth thought DH ordered her a yearbook and she thought it was really hers. I can just hear the office lady saying, "Please take this home for your older brother......"
I agree, under NO terms does she get to keep that yearbook even if her friends have already signed it. I would whack her upside her frikkin head with it! SD13 does stupid shit more and more often and plays the dumb card with me. "Oh I didn't know.....Oh, I thought you meant I was supposed to do XYZ." I have a feeling SheSloth knows exactly what she is doing and is being a vindictive bitch. I mean if she signed for the damn thing and she knows yo have been asking for it, then she knows exactly what is up! Grrrrrrr.
I would go over DH's head and intervene with a swift and severe punishment. You're going to have to hear a bunch of crap from the two of them, but it seems the only time us STalkers get anywhere is when WE go batshit crazy. Use it to your advantage and let off that steam! Scream your head off at her! If DH tries to calm you down, scream at him and tell him you have had enough disrespect in your own home. That is my mantra of late. Respect me, and don't do anything that is whack.
Hey at least you didn't find her underwear in the basement sink cabinet lol. Hang in there! What time will she be home?
~ Moon
"I was thinking maybe
"I was thinking maybe SheSloth thought DH ordered her a yearbook and she thought it was really hers."
Not possible, considering I asked her about it several times when I found out DH told her to get it...AND, she signed next to BS19's name clearly indicating that it was HIS yearbook she was picking up!
OMG!! First thing out of her
OMG!! First thing out of her mouth...LIE! "Oh, it's still at school. I haven't gotten it yet." BULLSHIT! And this time, I had my bases covered! DH: "Try again, because the school shows that you signed for it!" "Um...oh...I know I brought it home. I don't know where I put it." DH: "You have 2 minutes to find it!!!"
So, I'm still waiting for it to appear. Please don't let it be damaged, and if it is...time for the ax to come down!
Ugh - I've been following
Ugh - I've been following this all day hoping this wasn't the case.
I would follow her ass around
I would follow her ass around the house while she "finds" it. Take her cell phone and tell her she doesn't get it back until you have the yearbook in your hands. Even then, she should be on parental controls 24/7 for at least a week.
Punishment served.
So, I think it's in the house, since they don't have lockers. Grill her. Keep asking questions.
Damn! That girl isn't too
Damn! That girl isn't too bright is she.
Has she found it yet?
that thing is probably signed
that thing is probably signed by her friends, laying underneath a pile of shit filled thongs.
Something must be going down,
Something must be going down, otherwise Can't would have updated us. I hope she's ok. Yelling at Skids is like yelling at the f*cking wall. They don't think it matters.
Hasn't found it, but DH is so
Hasn't found it, but DH is so untrusting of her right now that he made her come to praise team practice with us to just sit there! Her phone is in lock down, no internet for who knows how long, and he let me tear into her! It felt amazing! I told her I don't believe a word that comes out of her mouth. I brought up that she never responded to my text, but she went straight to texting her boyfriend. This didn't sit well with DH, and he really got on her case. I called her a liar to her face, and all she could do is look at me with hatred! Sorry deary...doesn't phase me! Go ahead and hate! I'm in control at least for the moment, as I'm the one who shut down the phone and Internet, and DH just backed me up!
Now, she "thinks" she left it in the guard room. Neither I nor DH believe her, but if it isn't produced tomorrow, she is up a creek! I'm going to have to call the office tomorrow and inquire about a replacement...which I'm not happy about! And DH already told her she better hope it is found undamaged, or there will be hell to pay! I think this whole thing finally opened his eyes! Every other time I suggested that she was less than truthful, I've not had the solid proof behind me. This time, I'm fully armed, and he's realized I was perfectly justified in accusing her! So much for his thoughts this morning, which I think pisses him off more than anything...she made him look like an idiot for defending her to me!
He's also mad for being lied to, because he even asked her this week if she had been by the office to pick up the yearbook, and she told him she hadn't done it yet!
It's funny...DH even told her at one point, "You do this kind of crap in November? How dumb are you?" He was hinting on it nearly being Christmas, and the time we start thinking about gifts! He also kept asking her if she was on drugs, because only a person on drugs would be as clueless...so either she is on drugs or lying out of her ass all the time! Oh, and BM happen to call during all of this, and when she asked what he was doing, he said, "Calling our daughter out for being a liar!" Didn't seem like BM had much to say about it. Was probably thinking to herself, "doesn't surprise me!"
Glad to hear she is being
Glad to hear she is being punished. The phones and internet are all that drive these kids these days! Good on DH for saying it's almost Christmas bwahahahah! Now it's your job to keep reminding him of this when he starts to give in.
SheSloth you SUCK!
That's the worst part! She
That's the worst part! She has no excuse! She said she forgot she went to get it. That when DH first asked if she was on drugs! "How do you walk all the way to the office, sign your name to a piece of paper, and forget you did it? Are you on drugs?!"
It was priceless seeing her speechless when she knew she was totally busted, and nothing that came out of her mouth would be believed! DH even brought up the guard drama. I said, "For all we know, you strategically left out parts to make it look like you did NOTHING wrong!" DH then commented that the coach still hasn't called him. "I told her to call you." DH: "that's what you say...and right now, what you say carries NO weight!"
So now we wait and see if she produces the yearbook. Her phone is locked down. She is locked out of the Internet router. She should get an amazing night's sleep without her devices to distract her! Should be no issue getting up in the morning! Though I'm still totally pissed, I'm sitting back and enjoying this! Finally! FINALY, SheSloth is getting what she is due! Especially if I end up having to buy BS19 a replacement because she "lost" the original..."Oh, right...well that money came out of your Christmas present money!"
I'm really afraid it's gone. I mean...if she truly left it in the guard room, what are the chances it is still there...especially if the other girls thought it was hers and with all the drama!
Oh...and I'm certain she
Oh...and I'm certain she knows where it is! Like I said...she wanted one, and got all pouty when she was told the senior year only rule, and that dear daddy couldn't convince me otherwise! Since I've already searched the room, my guess is that it is at BM's...and not in the guard room. She probably had it stowed away in her bag, and then showed BM claiming it was hers, and then appeared to have innocently left it there! Would be interesting to see if BM would say anything about a yearbook if DH mentioned BS19's missing, and SheSloth being the one who "lost" it and lied about it. BM's mouth isn't always connected to her brain, and if had anything damaging to say, would say it. "Why would she do anything with her brother's yearbook when she has her own?"
No final outcome, yet. She
No final outcome, yet. She "thinks" she left it in the guard room. I'm not sure if they have cubbies in there are not. A thought did occur to me that she could have it in her uniform bag hiding, which would be up at school. If it was just laying around the guard room, who knows.
Another thing that has occurred to me is that she has been to BM's since she supposedly picked up the book. This means that she could have stashed the yearbook over there to make sure we wouldn't find it.
I did my own search of her room this morning with everyone gone. Did not find the yearbook. I have a message in to the school to inquire about the possibility of ordering another one...maybe they have some extras. I looked online at the company that does their yearbooks, and they only have orders up for the 2015 year, and their FAQ says if you need a prior year, you need to go through the school, as they have to authorize any reprints, etc. We will see if it is possible to get one for BS19, as I'm not holding out hope for the life of the original year book.
Theft is theft. Photo copy
Theft is theft. Photo copy the pick up signature for the year book and have her ass arrested and frog marched in cuffs out of class to the police car. Time to destroy her phone rather than just lick it down.
As much as I would LOVE to
As much as I would LOVE to see SheSloth have to go through all that crap, truth is, a $55 yearbook would only be misdemeanor theft...maybe a citation, slap on the wrist, and a fine that DH would have to pay...which basically means I have to cover, because we all know that DH does not have the extra money, and because she is a minor, he would get in trouble if the fine is not paid. What would she learn from it? Jack squat, because all the real trouble would fall on dear daddy.
The way I see it, she has stolen from me AND BS19. She has stolen from BS19 his property and means to reflect on the memories on probably his greatest year of high school. She stole from me the nice thing I tried to do for my son by buying him the yearbook in the first place (as he could have easily purchased it himself with the money he made working). Yes, it is a $55 yearbook, but you can't put any value on what it meant! She knows that! It is one thing if you do something that affects me...it is quite another when you mess with BD23 and BS19! Sad thing is, BS19 is the kind of guy who would probably try to down play it and try to say it is no big deal if the yearbook cannot be replaced, but I know deep down he will be sad about the memories the book held. As a mom, it tears me up knowing this...because I know my son! He has this big, tough persona and appearance, but underneath it all, he is one of the most humble, caring, and tender people I've ever known! For her to do this to him? There just aren't words!
as much as i am excited and
as much as i am excited and happy that your husband is ripshit about this and cracking down on her, history tells me it wont last....
i cant believe they would sign out that year book to anyone but the student who ordered it OR the parent. but then again, sad world we live in where a sibling cant be trusted to do the right thing and be responsible.
"but then again, sad world we
"but then again, sad world we live in where a sibling cant be trusted to do the right thing and be responsible."
THIS^^ We still live with small-town values out here...and yeah, you should be able to trust a younger sibling to do what they should! I mean, if the roles were reversed, and I told BS19 to pick something up for SheSloth, he would do it, and we wouldn't have an issue.
At one point, when DH let me tear into her, I even told her, "So, what...you hate that I bought one for your brother and not you, so you had to take or 'destroy' his? Are you that self centered? You KNOW the rule...has ALWAYS been the rule...you get a yearbook for your senior year and ONLY your senior year!" I mean, if she didn't keep it, I would not be surprised if she made it disappear just so that he wouldn't have one, either...because she didn't get one! It is something I wouldn't put past her!
And yes, the part of me that is actually happy that DH is finally cracking down on her this time is afraid that it will not last for long. By this time next week, he will probably be back to kissing her ass, after she plays super sweet all week to get her privs back! Even just last night...I so wanted to puke! During praise team practice, one of the ladies...a lady who is like a second mom to DH...started crying. She then told us a dear friend of hers passed away on Friday...and older lady that they had lived next door to since forever. She went on to tell us that the tears were good tears, because she KNOWS that the lady accepted Christ before her passing, and that she was with the Father, and that singing the praise songs just filled up her heart and made her emotional. Well, SheSloth comes walking over to the lady and gives her one of those "I'm so sorry" fake hugs to try to look all sweet and concerned. I seriously wanted to call her out right there and tell her to stop faking, but it wasn't the place.
I seriously have not said a word to her since going off on her yesterday. She knows where I stand right now with her! If anything, even if DH goes back to kissing her ass, maybe he will think twice about trying to push me to have a relationship with the girl any more. It really isn't happening! I'm more than done! At this point, I'm not affording her any luxuries. And seriously...don't ask me to ever go to another one of her events...don't even think about it! The answer will be, "No, and you KNOW why...so just leave it alone!" We were planning a trip to RenFest in a couple of weeks with some friends of ours, and I have half a mind to tell DH that SheSloth needs to go to BMs that weekend...I'm not dealing with her asking for things and I can't even fathom purchasing her a ticket after this yearbook thing.
SheSloth was supposed to make
SheSloth was supposed to make finding the yearbook her TOP priority when she got to school this morning, seeing as guard is 1st period. She was supposed to text me and DH with her findings (as we are the only ones allowed under lock down). NOT A WORD! I texted DH to find out if he heard anything...he hadn't. I laid it on really thick:
"I have a message in to the school...really hope it is possible to order him another one. Out $55 and if a replacement can't be bought, something that you really can't put a money value on for BS19!"
I'm not letting this one go! And if that yearbook doesn't magically appear in perfect condition this evening, I will be TELLING DH that SheSloth is not going to RenFest with us...he needs to tell her that, and arrange for her to go to BM's. And I will not be telling BS19 what happened to his yearbook...when he comes home for Thanksgiving, she will tell him! We will all sit down, and she better not try to play that it was an innocent "oops"...she will sit down and tell him, "You don't have a yearbook because of me! I lost it/damaged it!" She WILL be truthful with him, and I will not accept her telling him, "I'm sorry"...because I know it will be just empty fake words!
I'm also considering going out on my own and emailing all her teachers, and just asking if they saw her with a yearbook. See what responses I get back...not telling them that it was BS19's...just to see if any say, "Oh, yeah...she was having some of her friends sign it" or something like that. Bad thing is, SheSloth's English teacher is the uncle of BS19's best friend...and BS19 is close with that whole family...why I'm not saying who's yearbook it was, because he would be really upset with SheSloth!
Bye bye Christmas for
Bye bye Christmas for SheSloth!!!
Got off the phone with the school. They do have some extras, but the problem is that the extras were ordered after the fact this year, when the new yearbook adviser realized that they didn't include the extras for students who may have forgot to order to buy after the fact. So, since it was obviously a smaller, off-run of the books, they cost more to print. So the price for the replacement yearbook is $92!! They have the extras in the yearbook room, so I can take possession of it immediately upon purchase. That at least eases my mind about getting a replacement for BS19, but really pisses me off that I now need to pay nearly twice as much for the replacement because of SheSloth's stupidity! I'm basically buying 3 yearbooks here, and only getting one!
Even more reason for me at this point to tell DH that he needs to make sure that SheSloth goes to BM's RenFest weekend. She does not deserve to go! There is no reason to spend $25 on her ticket, plus the cost of any food stuffs and such for the day, only to have to listen to her whine because we won't buy her a mask, or earrings, or anything else for that matter! Of course, after all this crap, a mug of mead is really sounding good right now!
And I can promise you...IF that original yearbook ever shows up (because SheSloth isn't the brightest cookie, and may leave it laying out in her room or something thinking we forgot about it or won't notice it), I'm snatching it up and making myself a fire in the fireplace! I don't care if it is middle of summer when it shows up...I will send her a message that I DON'T FORGET!
UPDATE: DH finally responded to my text that the replacement book was $92. "Hmmm...that's a lot of extra work around the house." I'm so glad it was over text message, and I didn't have any drink in my mouth, because I literally burst out laughing out loud! I responded back, "Work around the house? I say she goes to BM's when we go to RenFest!" Can tell by his "we'll see what turns up and talk about it tonight" response that he doesn't like that idea. He sees it as "quality family time"...sorry, I see it as a treat and a reward, and someone who has "lost" BS19's property and lied about it does NOT deserve a treat or reward. Tell her we are going without it because she is a lying brat, and that will hit...trust me!
i would not divulge that you
i would not divulge that you can get the replacement just yet, even to your husband.
get it, go pick it up yourself, hide it in your room until thanksgiving and keep quiet.
i really want to see how he deals with this kid.
I had already texted
I had already texted him...wanted him to KNOW how bad this is, and that I'm really not happy!
We will see if he tries to plead her case tonight to go to RenFest...that will be telling! And if he insists that she go, I may just have to say, "Then fine, no one is going! Why? I'm not going to treat lying!" No sweat off of my back! Yeah, I love going to RenFest, but I will not hesitate to cancel such plans for bad behavior. Just ask my bios! They know! Only took cancelling Six Flags once to get their attention!
as much as the money suck and
as much as the money suck and the situation overall is horrid, the one good thing is your son didnt miss out and will get his yearbook.
This is true! Apparently
This is true!
Apparently after I texted him, he engaged communication with SheSloth, and responded to me, "She didn't find it." Of course, all I could say was, "can't say that surprises me!" I mean, really? Does he really think she looked for it? No she didn't! Why? Because she knows exactly where it is, be it in her cubby or her uniform bag at school, or at BM's safely tucked away somewhere. That is the really bad thing about them having another house to go to...they have a hiding place that you have NO control over, and in many of our cases, bios who are not willing to help you get to the truth of matters!
DH said we will figure out what to do about SheSloth later. Open your eyes, honey! Princess is not what you think she is, and she has just shown her true colors in a way you cannot just brush under the rug! When it affects me and mine, I have the right to demand justice!
She's not going to find it
She's not going to find it because it's all written in and she knows that she is already in trouble for it. It is going to be lost until enough time goes by and then it will reappear and she will think it will just be hers.
I agree with you that she shouldn't go with you but I can see your DH fighting you on it.
I am so angry at her for you. It was such a horrible thing for her to do and she knew exactly what she was doing. I really hope your DH wises up. It sounds like he's already giving in.
Good Luck tonight.
"She's not going to find it
"She's not going to find it because it's all written in and she knows that she is already in trouble for it. It is going to be lost until enough time goes by and then it will reappear and she will think it will just be hers."
This is why I'm considering emailing the teachers and inquiring if they saw SheSloth with a yearbook. If she had her little friends sign it because she intended to keep it for herself, someone would have seen her with it. I was just looking at who she has...two of the teachers I know...they had BS19 (and one is the uncle of his best friend). I just need to tread carefully there. Don't want to cause a huge fight with DH, but I think the truth needs to be uncovered.
Wouldn't it be interesting if the reason she "can't find it" was because she was disrupting class having her little friends sign it, and the teacher took it up and said that she needed to have her parents contact them to get it back? Of course she couldn't have her parents get it back for her...that would mean admitting she stole it! Oh, that would be priceless! I would have to tell the teacher, "Well, do what you want with it, but don't give it back to her, because it wasn't hers to start with! I've already purchased a replacement for the rightful owner!"
Oooooooo....I LOVE that idea!
Oooooooo....I LOVE that idea! Freshman yearbook instead of senior? Priceless!
I doubt I could ever get DH
I doubt I could ever get DH to withhold her from tomorrow night's playoff game. The good thing is, the way the football team has been looking, I don't see them getting past the team they pay tomorrow night. Winter guard competitions do not start until after the first of the year.
As for work, I'm not holding my breath! The only chore the girl has right now is to take out the trash, and take the can to the curb on Thursday nights. She can't even do that right!! Anything else she has done, I've had to go back behind her and redo. That is why I burst out laughing when I read DH's comment about extra housework.
On the other hand, it is almost Christmas. I will get my just revenge...and there will be NO RenFest for "the princess", and any "big" present DH may have in mind for her will be shot down! There is always the dollar store!
i get the temptation to want
i get the temptation to want to uncover the truth and talk to her teachers. but it wont do any good other than to give you the satisfaction that you were spot on.
i can hear your DH - "she knows she made a mistake, but she really wanted a yearbook, and didnt think she could ask because she knew you would say no" (because you are the bad guy, remember?) followed by "and we got BS19 another one, so what harm is there in letting her keep this one? its already signed by her friends. you wouldnt make BS19 give up something that sentimental, would you?"
i am just shocked at her boldness. but again, she gets away with it so maybe it isnt all that shocking.
Well, there is always the
Well, there is always the above suggestion. I would just say, "Well, fine. Seeing as there has been a one yearbook per child rule, I guess this means she has already gotten her one! I don't care how much she cries her senior year for a book...she got her one!"
I'm not shocked at all. Remember, this is the girl who skipped school to smoke pot, and posted pictures of herself with a joint on Instagram! Either bold or stupid...one of the two!
Oh...I hold grudges, too.
Oh...I hold grudges, too. This they will soon find out. Can't wait until she "needs" something again! "Oh, what? You need $20 for a guard t-shirt? Oh, wait...you still owe me $92! How about no guard shirt, and you now owe me $72!" Wonder how long she can survive in guard without the things she "needs"!
Wow, what a frikking piece of
Wow, what a frikking piece of work SheSloth is! I would tell DH that it's not in the budget to spend $92 for a replacement yearbook right now. Maybe SheSloth can pay the money? Of course, who knows where that will come from....Oh wait from you to DH to SheSloth. Nevermind, wishful thinking.
Yes, find that yearbook eventually and save it for her Senior Year. Call me nostalgic.
You may have to REALLY give DH an earful to get him to keep her from RenFest. Again, say it's not in the budget, clients are traveling for the holidays, not as many trainer appts at the gym, etc.
Whatever works, but keep your ears and eyes open for tidbits as to where that yearbook is. I bet it's at BM's, too.
~ Moon
Oh...I'm certain it is at
Oh...I'm certain it is at BM's at this point...especially since I personally searched her room (with gloves on of course, and lots of washing after).
Should have seen her face when I dropped the other bomb on her tonight! DH didn't even know it was coming...hadn't discussed it with him. "Oh, and you are NOT changing rooms next month, as you couldn't even follow the requirements!" DH reminded her that requirements were to keep her current room clean, keep up with her homework, and not get into any trouble! Shot that all to hell! I told her if she didn't care enough to do her part, I didn't care enough to try to move and reorganize all of the stuff in the closet in the dogs' room, or the other stuff in there (extra shelves, DH's backup tires, etc.). Told her...I'm not doing it...she's not changing rooms! She looked so defeated at getting this news. Oh well!
We haven't discussed RenFest yet, but I'm still going to push that one! She can give up what would have been spent on her that day for the cost of the new book!
nice call on not letting her
nice call on not letting her change rooms.
I have BS19's replacement
I have BS19's replacement yearbook in hand. I'm keeping it locked in my office until he gets home. Now that I know exactly what the yearbook looks like, much easier for me to keep my eye out for the "lost" book.
@Calypso...I had to do it! I never really liked the idea of her changing rooms at all. Her excuse of not having room is B.S.! Girl has piles of trash in her room, and piles of clothes with a nearly empty bar in her closet, and nearly empty drawers in her 5-drawer tallboy dresser! She hasn't even tried to keep her room clean since the deal was made, and I was starting to get upset that I was going to have to go through all the work to reorganize my stuff when she didn't keep up her end. By getting into trouble for lying to our faces, she gave me a reason that DH would stand behind! It all worked in my favor!
SheSloth is already asking when she will be off of punishment. DH told her that he isn't setting an end time until he starts seeing some changes in her behavior. The latest round of lying was just icing on the cake. He was already getting upset with her not doing her school work, her constant attitude, her disregard for anything he says, etc. Before the lies, he was already on the verge of shutting off all of her device access, so the lies just tipped the scale. At this point, she is looking at at LEAST 2 weeks.
i actually wonder (after
i actually wonder (after watching too many episodes of "Hoarders") if the damage to her room is as extensive as ive seen on that show. rotted floor boards, mold in the carpets, etc. even if she picked everything up the damage may require full renovation. why risk damaging a second room to the same degree?
LOL...I know, right? I mean,
LOL...I know, right? I mean, there are already tons of nail holes in her walls because she keeps moving stuff. Going to be insane to prep those walls for repaint after she leaves! And there is a big dark stain of who knows what on her floor...I'm willing to bet that she spilled nail polish. Now, granted, the carpet in the whole house needs replacement after 11 years...pad under is all flattened and stuff, but we are waiting to be kidless before we started tackling the floors. We want to put in hardwood, but DH isn't a COMPLETE idiot! He knows SheSloth would trash it through the whole house with her feet dragging and all.
And her room does smell kinda mildewy. So, yeah...no! I'm waiting for DH to open that bathroom door! We have to keep it closed to keep the dogs out of the trash that SheSloth never takes out. I surely don't want to find pads in my exercise room! I peeked in there the other day, and SheSloth has started expanding her mess to in there! There is a nice mountain of dirty clothing...including poop soiled undies...making it so you can't even open the door all the way!
I'm not looking forward to the work that will need to be done when the girl is out of this house!
I'm glad you were able to get
I'm glad you were able to get a new book for your son. I'm with Ditzy. Time to start asking teachers, etc. about the lost book. It will turn up or information about SD having it. She should face the full punishment for the full crime.
Yeah...I'm really weighing
Yeah...I'm really weighing sending an email to all of her teachers asking if they noticed her with a yearbook. Like I said before, if she was having her little friends sign it with intent to keep it, someone had to have noticed.
I'm glad I was able to get a replacement. I was looking through it...they did a really nice job with BS19's senior class! That is the other reason that I have always told the kids that I would buy the senior yearbook and not the others. I don't know about other schools, but around here, they have always been more geared toward the seniors. Yeah, they have pictures for the other classes, and they have pictures of all the clubs, but over half the book is senior stuff, because that is who the book is actually for. I mean, the whole idea of signing yearbooks isn't because you will see that person next year! It is because you are probably NOT going to see that person next year because everyone has gone off to do their thing! Even if it was just to look at herself, you look at the index...SheSloth is only on 2 pages...her individual picture, and the color guard. BS19 is on many pages, because he was a senior!
I can't wait for the original to turn up! SheSloth will get sloppy at some point, she always does. She will think it is all forgotten, we have stopped looking for it, etc. I will have my eyes out for it, and when I see it, I will snatch it away from her or tell her, "Oh, look! The yearbook does still exist! Guess that means you already have your one high school yearbook...sorry if you want your senior book. Ain't happenin'!!!"