SD19 - I'm Walking On Eggshells
SD19 has been home from college since before Christmas. Only a week to go. I avoid her like the plague. She is entitled and is a raging lunatic when anyone ASKS her to do something around the house. So, DH and I don't ask much of her, in order to keep it calm. Over the past two weeks, I have noticed the utensils with crud still on them when they come out of the dishwasher. I make sure to put these at SD19's place setting on the rare occasions we all sit down to dinner (maybe once a week).
The other week, I opened her bedroom door and saw Christmas wrapping paper, trash, water bottles, coffee mugs....everywhere. I have been going through DH lately and I tell HIM to check her room. He looked in there last night and told her to move things off of the floor so she could vacuum it this weekend. She whined in protest. Nothing happened.
Today, SD19 and DH are out at the movies and I peeked in her room. Anything that I pay for needs to be handled, in my opinion. That means food and utensils, mugs, etc. need to be cleaned and wrappers disposed of when you are done. Not a month later by DH when you are back at school. Upon looking in her room, there were a half dozen water bottles on the floor next to her laptop that we bought her for HS graduation. So glad she is taking care of it.
I took all of the water bottles, including one that was mostly full, and tossed them on her bed. I took the laptop and tossed it on her bed. I took a coffee mug that she had eaten ice cream with hot fudge on top from, and tossed it on her bed. THAT one has been in there for three weeks. There was a box of Cheez-Its on the floor, FULL, so I tossed that on her bed. I took two gift bags full of trash and Christmas paper and tossed them on her bed.
I have never done this before and I am pissed and nervous all at once. She comes home where we feed her and keep a roof over her head for free and then she ruins things that are SHARED things. Food, utensils. The laptop has a high dollar value on it and she treats it like crap.
SD19 is probably BPD and ODD but never went to therapy long enough for anything besides worrying about the size of her ass. DH is a Disney Dad and she doesn't listen to him. DH even paid her airfare last week so SD19 could GO to Disney and meet a friend for a few days. LOL When DH and SD19 get home, I think I will tell her that I put some things on her bed that need to be taken care of, and leave it at that.
Then WW3 will begin and DH MAY say that he told her about this before, but he won't be harsh enough. I have to remember that less is more with these narcissistic entitled SDs. I'll just keep repeating that she "needs to take care of those things." If she bitches then I'll tell her not to use anything from our kitchen because she doesn't take care of it, and that she can buy her own food. She will be throwing a full-on tantrum by then, DH will be pissed at me, and I will still be the bad guy, just because a 19yo brat can't clean up after herself.
Oh well. My house, my rules, chickadee. Any advice? My stomach is in my throat already.