Pet Names
Hi, I'm new here, I'm not quite sure I have all of the abbreviations down so please have patience with me. I found this website recently and was reading a lot about Disney dads with mini-wives and was very happy to see I'm not crazy! FDH has been making improvements and I am grateful for that. It's no where near perfect but he is realizing.
One thing I do want to ask is does it make you uncomfortable when your SO calls you sweetheart, baby, whatever then turns around and calls SD that? It makes me feel very weird, but I'm not sure if I'm over reacting. He has a nickname for SD13, called her that since infancy, which is fine. My own father still calls me peanut and so does my baby sister. But he also calls her sweetheart, baby, honey, my princess, etc then turns around and says those things to me. It's weird. A few months ago I was sick and he bought me flowers, I was saying how much I loved them and appreciated him and such, he says to me well you're my princess. I almost threw up. I was like I am not your princess! You call SD13 that! How am I supposed to think that's romantic at all??? He was completely baffled. Am I over reacting?
Yeah, it would definitely
Yeah, it would definitely creep me out to share a pet name with a SD (or even a BD). Fortunately, I have a son and SS so I've never had to deal with that. But yeah, he should be calling you by two different pet names, IMO. You're not the princess, you're the QUEEN!
Your and your DH's have
Your and your DH's have different interpretations on the subject. To him they're terms of endearment which are not really pet names. Although I would hate to be called princess!
He really doesn't understand
He really doesn't understand when I say I don't like it. But when he says baby I'm gonna do this. Or sweetheart can you do that for me. And SD is like okay!! (It's usually obvious that he's talking to me, but that's a whole other story) It shouldn't be confusing. The "terms of endearment" I call my son never transfer over to FDH. That just seems so unromantic. I don't know. Maybe I'm the one being weird.
I guess you can argue
I guess you can argue symantics. He shouldn't be calling you princess and he shouldn't be calling his daughter Babe. You're not a child and his daughter's not a hot piece of arse. If that doesn't knock some sense into him then reiterate what your name is whenever he refers to an endearment.
Too Add:
YOu can come up with an pet name with equal annoyance. Like "little prince." Anything with the word "little" should bother him. }:)
That comment just made me
That comment just made me think about this past weekend!
SD14 was looking at tiaras, and saying she NEEDED one for her birthday. It was sickening seeing DH eating up that SD14 needed a princess birthday. I don't know if he could see by the look on my face I was disgusted, but he then asked me, "Do you need a princess party?" I looked at him right in the eyes and said, "Hell no! I'm NOT a princess! I'm the queen!!!" The look on SD14's face was priceless!!! There were literally daggers coming out of her eyes! Hey...gotta knock the girl down to the level she belongs...LOL!
Hahaha. Good for you!! I
Hahaha. Good for you!! I would have said the exact same thing.
When we first got together we would always drive in my car because it is more spacious. SD asked me if I could sit in the back seat because "daddy always lets her sit out front with him". I said no, but with a smile because I had only known them for probably 6 months or so and wasn't very comfortable yet. She asked again. Not only was she asking an adult to sit in the back while she (11) sat out front. It was my frigging car!!! I don't sit in the backseat of my own car for anyone, especially a little girl! I was pissed. I told my step mom about it and she laughed and laughed. She was like I really hope you love this man!
THIS I'm not really bothered
THIS
I'm not really bothered by DF calling me and had girls then name UNLESS he calls me Princess. YUCK
I'm not a helpless little girl who needs someone to take care of me.
"I'm not a helpless little
"I'm not a helpless little girl who needs someone to take care of me."
That's literally what I said to him. He was like no no no that's not what I think at all! But it still grosses me out. I am not your sweet little innocent daughter to spoil. I am the strong and independent woman you share a life, bed, and child with. He has said it once or twice since then and I made it very clear that it was not to be said again or I might throw up.
Queen...absolutely!
Queen...absolutely!
DH did this and I point blank
DH did this and I point blank asked him, "which honey??" when SD was there.
both of us stared at him and he hasn't done it since.
Ugh...I have actually caught
Ugh...I have actually caught MYSELF doing that.
My word for almost everyone is babe or hun.
I have done that when my son and DH have been in the same room and they wonder who I am talking too. lol
Thank goodness my DH is a better person than me, cause it would tick me off if he did that to SS and I. lol
Never Princess...and SO
Never Princess...and SO doesn't call SD princess either. I hate that...SO's mom calls SD "princess". UGh it makes it feel like she should be treated like a princess and everything catered to her and that we should bow down to her whenever she walks in the room. And don't look her in the eyes, she's royalty. LOL!
SO has been doing that a lot lately. Calling her Baby etc. It is a little weird but then I started doing it too...I stopped and thought to myself, FTMandSM WTF are you doing??? You just called SD baby??? Weirdo. Yeah I gave myself a talk, lol!
If after an adult to adult
If after an adult to adult talk wherein you tell him to stop using certain names simply ignore him when he uses them to get your attention even to the point of it being silly such as when you're the only female in the room. Simply ignore him as if he didn't speak.
Not something I have
Not something I have experienced but I suppose it would bother me if my bride did this.
DH used to call SDstb13
DH used to call SDstb13 "Baby" until I told him I didn't like it. I told him, "Either call me baby or her baby but not BOTH of us. I will NOT share a pet name with anybody." So now he calls me baby and her pumpkin.
He used to say, "Good morning, Sunshine" to both of us, but he apparently got the hint from our "baby" conversation and quit saying that to either of us for awhile, which kind of hurt my feelings because he said that to me a lot when we were dating. But then a few mornings ago he started saying it to me again:) SD is gone to BM's though, so hopefully he won't be saying it to her again, too, or I'll be a really pissed off Queen.