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I feel horrible for hating my stepkid

lyann76's picture

I have two boys, 7 months and 24 yrs. and then there is the stepson. My stepson is 15. I cant even be sure that we'll be rid of him at 18, I wish his mother would take him more often. He lives with us and sees her once or twice a year. He always has a scowl on his face and doesnt do anything I ask/tell him to do. If he does he scowls through it while dragging his feet.
The other day, I caught him putting his smelly socks in my 7 months old face and I was furious. I yelled sat him and told his father who said nothing. I've had dreams of smashing his head against a wall...
My mom is totally nice to this kid she says he needs "love" since his mother abandoned him at the age of 7. I sort of understand but I still hate his guts Sad

SO DONE

lyann76's picture

I dont think he knows what to do. He typically just orders him around and the kid listens. They have a pretty good relationship, its been just the two of them for about 10 years so I came into an awkward situation. My husband couldn't be happier about me and our new son and his son not so much.

lyann76's picture

yeah I apologize if I offended you with a dream I had but I cant control my dreams. What I can tell you is that I have felt like smashing both of their heads together on many an occassion. Yet Im trying to be patient and love this kid, who is not mine and has been damaged goods because his mom isnt doing her job. it sucks. I came here to vent not to be judged. Thanks.

lyann76's picture

Maybe it was poor parenting but he loved his son enough to take care of him when the mom walked out so I give him credit. I guess I should not have married a single father, the damage moms do when they walk out on their kids is a headache I didnt sign up for.

Rags's picture

Pepper spray that abusive POS next time he assaults your 7mo old with his filthy laundry or anything else for that matter. While he is flopping on the floor crying that he can't breath and his eyes hurt hog tie him then call 911 and have him hauled of in cuffs. His daddy can bail him out when he gets home.

A teen scrubbing a 7mo old's face with dirty socks? Really??? I don't give a shit who abandoned this POS at what age I would have zero tolerance for this crap and my 7mo old would be protected from that crap with the fullest force I could muster against this useless waste of skin.

The therapy that this POS kid needs is a good ass whoopin.

ZERO TOLERANCE!!!!!!

Bring the pain.

lyann76's picture

Smile I concur, a good old fashioned ass whoopin. Most teens nowadays do.

lyann76's picture

Here's what happened. His dad told him to spend time with the baby and bond. I was leery but I didnt want to argue. I stepped out of the room and when I came back he was on his phone (typical teenager) and he had half of his sock off his foot and his foot dangling near the baby's face. and the baby was reaching for it to put it in his mouth.

I was LIVID because this kid's feet wreak and he had to be sent to the bathroom to wash his feet on a couple of occasions.

it was very stupid. and I was VERY pissed. I was even more pissed that my husband didnt back me up. and yes my husband is part of the problem. I know this.

lyann76's picture

I dreamt about slamming his head against a wall a long time ago...this incident was recent. I didnt actually slam his head against a wall.

BarkAtTheMoon's picture

The drywall in your mind sounds a lot like the drywall in my mind. My SD19 is the same way except she is ODD and will not hesitate to talk back, like she owns the joint. The holidays should be wonderful this year!

Yes, the problem is with your Disney DH. I have started voicing my concerns to my DH lately, and I haven't been as nice as usual. My complaints are about the messiness in the house. If I had a 7mo baby and found a Skid doing what yours did, I would be livid!!! I would snap and take all of the electronics for a month.

Your skid sounds like an ass, but yes, he probably does need TLC. Have DH deliver it for starters by paying him some attention by way of house rules and boundaries.

Everyone on here posts about how they can't wait until their skid turns 18. It doesn't make a damn bit of difference. A lot can't make it on their own at that young age. I am counting the years until SD19 is out of college for a year, then buh-bye.....

lyann76's picture

yup his dad said nothing. He is usually very fair and strict concerning rules but that time he really stayed quiet. We may need to get him a counselor. I will ask my DH.

lyann76's picture

Thank you all for listening. Being able to have a safe place to vent without judgement has been therapeutic. Im glad Im not the only one having trouble "Blending" in a blended family. At any rate, I will do my best to be kind to my wounded skid and ensure he has a positive adulthood, in spite of his adverse upbringing. Good luck to all of you.

Rags's picture

Corporal punishment is something that many kids and even their idiot parents need upon occasion. I draw the line at tolerance when the behavior of a kid interferes with other people.

Case in point ..... restaurants. When a shit kid is running amok through a restaurant while their idiot parents are yacking with their friends and ignoring the spectacle that their crotch dribbles are causing I act. I have on many occasions called for the restaurant manager and demanded that the child be ejected from the restaurant. I have on more than one occasion called a kid who is running amok through a restaurant over to me and told him to go back to his table, sit his ass down, and shut up. Of course I have also had offended parents take exception to me huwwting theiw wittle spe-cial crotch plops fee-fees. My comment to them is that they were worth a shit as parents other people would not be infected by the animal behavior of their spawn. Many have left immediately after I bare their asses publically.

Quality parents have children who sit, behave, eat, engage in discussion, etc... and not feral children who are the result of free range parenting. Idiot parents have animal children. A stinging, cherry red, tender ass resolves these issues.

A teen who does not treat a baby with caring behavior is also over the line of tolerance IMHO and needs his ass spanked or his nose to meet some drywall.

IMHO of course.

earthsage's picture

You poor thing. The most frustrating thing I see here is the father not backing you up. I just joined this site because I'm correcting my fiance's kids more than he is. Him being too wimpy to stand up to his kids is turning me off. I'm only slightly angry from it so far. I do speak up about it occasionally and told him I think we should go to therapy because I see it causing future static in our relationship. The worst part though is it turning me off. Good luck to you.