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having difficulty having a relationship with my SS

tweetybird74's picture

Hi everyone,

I need some help. I have a 15 yr old SS and basically we have no relationship. I am not sure where to start to fix this. I want to fix it but just don't know how. My partner says I am to critical and can't let anything go.

My SS has some issues, he is ADD and I believe there may be some other things going on. He is failing all of his subjects in school, can't manage to do any chores without being reminded and he only has 2. He sneaks food and hides the garbage in his dresser drawers. He takes the little labels that come on apples and sticks them underneath the kitchen cupboards. He answers the phone and then does not give messages until 2 or 3 days later and then can only tell you someone called but does not even remember who it was. I am slightly frustrated by his behaviours. He is disrespectful to his father. He lives with us fulltime and rarely even talks to his mother. She is a bit of a *F* up, who has 2 other children and just does not have time for her own son.
This is why I want to have a better relationship with him, I do not want to fill his mothers shoes, but be a positive female role model in his life.
We barely talk anymore and I have no idea even where to start to fix this. It is affecting my relationship with my partner.
What do I do?

Most Evil's picture

Is he taking medication for his ADD? or how is that treated? I hate to say that, it sounds like someone (dad, where are you) needs to just help him 'remember' to do all this stuff or not.

I think you should attempt disengagement so that the dad is forced to help his child! I hope that will work out for you.

Let us know how it is going and maybe we can help re-direct any issues. Good luck-!
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“Learn by practice.” - Martha Graham