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SS21 is making me INSANE

ScaredIam2Young4This's picture

Hey Everyone-

So I have some new drama to share and advice to solicit. My SS21 is involved in a "relationship" with a 17 year old girl who lives about 40 miles from him. They've been "together" for about 4 months and have only actually seen each 5 times. Her parents are super strict and very conservative (possibly abusive)and don't approve of him. They met on FB and communicate mostly through it because my DH, SS21's Stepmom, and I have decided he needed to have his cell phone taken away (crazy bills, no job, general laziness, etc.) After 3 years of waiting for him to get a job, go to school (he just stopped going to community college one day and never went back) get his driver's license restored (tickets, didn't go to court) we're at our wits end and decided to give him the old, you've got a month to get a job, figure out school, or you're joining the military. This little GF pops into our life via text message about week ago and starts telling us how we need to be more patient, that the two of them are in love and will make a life together.

The scary part, aside from all the OBVIOUSLY scary parts is that this is the exact same situation that SS21's father was in at 17 when SS21 was born. We've tried to talk to him, talk to her, and we're getting nowhere. He lives half time with us and half time with his Stepmom (BM has been out of the picture since he was 2). None of us can afford to keep paying for him and he seems completely uninterested in doing anything but partying & facebooking...

Ugh! Help me! I've already spoken to his GF and explained why this is bad, but she's convinced they're going to be together forever. She's never even had sex yet with anyone and I'm terrified my SS is going to get her knocked up...

marty15's picture

I don't think there is any good/easy answer so I'm curious to see if other posters will have any ideas. I feel bad for you and scared this is my future!

My sister's friend's 20 year old son had a "relationship" with a woman on FB and she quickly got pregnant with twins, now wants nothing to do with him except child support. Sad
What a way to start out, a 20 year old kid on the hook for child support the next 18 years for two kids he will have to fight to see.

ScaredIam2Young4This's picture

Hey, thanks for the advice everyone! He lives with us half time and with his Stepmom the other half of the time. We've all agreed that he's out in a month (August 7th) if he hasn't secured a job.

The problem with enlisted his GF's parents is that I have a suspicion that her father has abused her physically and is continuing to do so emotionally and mentally. I'm just not sure what to do.

ownedbypedro's picture

I apologize - I must have missed previous posts of yours. Does you SS have TWO stepmoms? Please forgive me being so intrusive - I am just confused.