I realize I have used almost all of my blogs to bash my DH and the way he parents, but seriously, he's the biggest problem when it comes to the SKs cause I make rules and I make consequences for breaking them. So here I go letting off some steam cause I'm always the bad guy. My DH can never make rules, and if he does, he doesn't stick to them. When the kids break them, especially his 11yo, (the one who is disrespectful any chance he can be, calls DH names and tells him he's stupid if tries to make him mind) DH let's it all slide, no punishment to be had. I bought SS11 a game for Christmas, told him specifically not to take it to his mothers because, the other kids have games they play on it too. He takes it there and I ask DH what he's going to do abt it, and its-nothing! I'll tell him tomorrow to bring it back. Well that's great, seeing how he goes to his Moms only once a week cause she can't stand him either! And so no one gets to play it . It all Makes me so angry because we had a fight about this already and the answer was no to it leaving this house. It's not really even about the game, it my DH reaction to everything SS11 does. SS stole DD10's Easter candy and money, lied about it, finally said he "found it" , with candy eaten, chocolate bunny smashed , box open, and money lost, but recovered from an undisclosed location only he knew abt? And when I asked him why he opened it and he had it, DH got pissed off and defensive saying I shouldn't accuse cause I didn't see it?? Um, he had everything but chocolate running out of his mouth.
And SD18, graduates next month, she works FT, has a BF stays at his house most the time, comes here to sleep, shower and get money from her dad cause her mom gives neither of the kids money for anything, thats DH burden. My DH pays for her birth control that she could get for free at the health dept! And then SD18 brags abt all the stupid crap she spends her money on, I finally talk DH into saying something to her about her paying for it on her own, and she screams-you don't want me to get pregnant do you?!? I bit my tongue, but what I really wanted to say was- you are 18 years old, go to the health dept or the Dr, and get your own birth control because if you get pregnant, its your fault cause you can't keep your legs shut! And she also wants him to pay for her and her boyfriend a hotel room for prom. Hell to no on that one. But guess what DH thinks about it?? Yeah, nothing wrong with that, she doesn't do drugs or drink (she's only been on probation and had to go through counseling for a year because she hit a kid, then there was that other fight that got her suspended), but she doesn't drink or do drugs. Would any of you pay for your own kids birth control when they turn 18?, if thy were out loosely spending their money on other things? How bout a hotel room? DH has made the kids so that thy believe they are entitled to these sort of things. How many of you would let your 11 yo ride a street legal moped in the city without supervision? It's illegal to ride one here until your 14. Or how about going to a15 year old girl's house with no knowing of parents being there, or even knowing where the house was , for hours on end? these things are all wrong in my book. I'm not just polling to get an answer of yeah, your right, he's wrong. I want to know am I gone overboard with the things I can't let go of? Am I too strict, bossy? I think he let's some of it happen because I disapprove. I grew up with strict parenting, and my DH had none. And he thinks because he turned out well his kids will too. The line has to be drawn, and its hardly even. I've tried detaching myself from the "parenting" part of the SKs but I can't ever do it fully because it always involves my 2 younger ones.