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Should This Be a Concern?

Anxious_Poet's picture

My SD was 6-yrs-old when she starting acting out in "different" ways. One day I caught her putting a plastic toy flute in between her butt cheeks. I was horrified and demanded that my DH deal with that disgusting (yet alarming) behavior. A few weeks later, I find her upstairs in her bedroom with an oversized teddy bear on top of her and pretending that it is humping her! Again, horrified, and had DH deal talk to her again. A few weeks later, I find her and another little girl from our neighborhood nude under some blankets playing "truth or dare" and touching each others' genitals. The other girl was promptly sent home, and, again, DH talked to her about it. (to no avail)
DH informed BM of these behaviors and each time she claimed that we were lying and that SD didn't do those kind of things. Now, I know BM has recently declared that she is bi and has had numerous "affairs" with her new friends, and that SD has walked in a few times when BM is entertaining or watching her latest porn flick.
Is SD just picking up on the general behaviors that she is seeing with BM? I have two BD's that are almost the same age as SD and they DO NOT engage in these types of sexual play. In fact, they say that they are uncomfortable when SD tries to engage them in these behaviors.
Should I take her to the pediatrician? BM keeps calling saying that SD is giving her all sorts of attitude and behavioral probs at home and that she will start taking SD to counseling, but to no avail.
I'm freaking out thinking that my SD is being molested or something. My DH is afraid to confront BM for fear of retaliation.
Any suggestions?

Anne 8102's picture

I don't know how much time you guys have the child, so I don't know if you have her during weekdays where you could take her to counseling or whatever, but you need to find out what's at the root of this behavior. If you have her during the weekdays, take her to a pediatrician and get advice... probably your next stop will be finding her a therapist to talk things through with so you can find out where this behavior is coming from. If you are the EOW household, then I would call CPS and have them investigate what's happening at BM's house or anywhere else this child could have possibly been abused. And I'm sorry, I don't care what your orientation is or how you "entertain" your sexual partners, doors have locks and if you have children, you ought to be using them. She doesn't sound very responsible, at the very least.

~ Anne ~

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h7's picture

I agree with Anne, bypass the ex & get her some help. She's either seen or experienced something she shouldn't have. Also, officially getting her help will create legal documentation that you guys might just need in the future.

Imustbcrazy's picture

This child needs some help. Dh doesn't have to ASK PERMISSION to take her to the Dr. he just has to inform the EX that she is going to the Dr. Take her as soon as you can.

Daddys Gurl

CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG?

sixxnguns's picture

this is how I came to find out my daughter had been molested by another child who's mother was babysitting her last year....she has been in play therapy for about 4 months now...and I'm waiting on the police to contact me about the boy that did this to her...and it's very HARD to go through watching your child lose their innocence at such a young age and it breaks my heart but also angers me that someone I trusted wasn't supervising my child with HER child...she has obviously been exposed to something sexual...and if she has been violated in anyway it should be reported to the appropriate authorities when it's found out what has happened...I feel so bad for these little kids that have to go through this...:(

peachymom's picture

A certain amount of courosity is normal for her age. But this seems a bit much. I remember being 6 a playing "i'll show you mine..." you get the picture. But this does seem extreme. take her to the doctor ASAP! they will know much more. If SD needs to talk to some one doctor can recomed a good child phycologist. She could be being exposed to a bit too much stuff at BM house for sure. No child should be seeing any sort of X rated movies. I don't think anything over PG is much for a kid that age. I would insist DH take SD to the doctor. If he wont, Maybe contact child services, and see what suggestions they can give you. This should not be ignored.