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Fiancé is a pushover

RLZ0073's picture

Fiancé (male) has no cajones when it comes to his kids. It’s getting pathetic.

The psycho ex is getting $2k a month. She has now moved in this current boyfriend after dating for 2 months. When the girls are there, the ex has sex out loud so the girls can here her. This man yells at the girls, even though he has no say in their discipline.

The fiancé doesn’t know how to stand up to his own damn kids. The slightly younger one, insulted me while I was standing right there and he didn’t discipline her for it. The brat dragged down the expensive bean bag he found for her based on her exactly wants... he asked her what she was doing. She apparently is taking it to her mother’s home! WTH?!? Instead of saying no... this is what I paid for and it stays in my home... he let her take it!

Then the other brat refuse to straighten up her room before he took them home. He threatened to keep her cellphone... she said, ‘I’m not cleaning my room until you clean the garage.’ These girls really have some nerve.
So she slammed her bedroom door in his face... and he gives in. She gets her phone.

But when I go to say, ‘hey, you need to keep the stuff you buy here...’ he starts yelling at me! And then telling me he’s going to criticize my daughter while she’s there....

WTF?!? Hey this is my house too and no, I did not agree with the brat taking stuff to her mom’s house. She gets enough money and her and her gross boyfriend have a great time with that $2k...

This is truly becoming bullsh@t.... I’m so damn tempted to walk away as he can’t figure out where to direct his anger...

notsobad's picture

You need to break up with him.

Please don’t come back and tell us wonderful things about him, or that he’s your soulmate, or that you only ever fight about the skids.

Leave him, leave him now!

NOTHING. IS. GOING. TO. CHANGE.

In fact it’s just going to get worse.

Find someone who isn’t a Disney dad, who respects you, and who actually loves his kids enough to want them to grow up to be good people.
Or find a guy without kids.

RLZ0073's picture

Believe me... I’m not going to ever come back and state that he’s wonderful. He has anger issues and he will never put me and my common sense before the 2 evil spawn he had with the crazy ex, oh who is a mental health professional, which I find HILARIOUS...

I wish I didn’t sell my house... I waited over a year before putting it on the market, because situations like this. I miss my house I had when I was single.

notsobad's picture

You can’t go back and change things but you can make changes going forward.

Don’t get married.

Take the money you got for the sale of your house and do what you want. Do what is good for you. If you still want to date this guy, fine date him but Do. Not. Marry. Him!

When people show you who they are, believe them!
He’s shown you who he is, believe him!

twoviewpoints's picture

So you're still getting married in April?

Why not take what you got for selling your house and put it towards a nice new little home for yourself? Now is the time to do that BEFORE you marry and stay in this mess you're so unhappy with. You could go ahead and keep seeing the guy, but you'd be free to slam the door on him and never open it again when you've finally had enough.

You've got at least six more years before these kids age out and these kids aren't going to suddenly change nor is he.

Because you already sold your house seems like a silly reason to go ahead and marry into all this. Choice is yours, but you certainly won't be one of the SMs who can say you didn't know what you were getting into.

twoviewpoints's picture

Because the adult problems are different than minor child problems. Responsibility legal wise ends at age of supposed 'maturity' aka becomes an adult.

Once that age is hit, anything else is optional. Meaning there is no law that says a parent must kiss the *ss of their adult offspring. They no longer have to house, feed, pay for and/or eat together at family holidays Wink It's all optional.

notsobad's picture

“Once that age is hit, anything else is optional. Meaning there is no law that says a parent must kiss the *ss of their adult offspring. They no longer have to house, feed, pay for and/or eat together at family holidays”

Bahahahaha, are you new to this board?

Disneyfan's picture

Wait a minute. You are complaining about the stepdad yelling at the kids AND their father for ignoring their awful behavior.
Both men can't be wrong. Dirol :?

Walking away from this cluster F should be a no brainer

RLZ0073's picture

Their mother is the one who should step in... not some stranger who gave up the rights to his own kids many years ago.

That asshole (her boyfriend) gave the older SD (who has mental issues) an unloaded gun to ‘try out’.

Fiancé’s mom even knows the kids were raised horribly...

I just wish the mother and the girls would move away... we had plans to leave the state soon after the younger one turned 18... don’t know if I can put up with another 5 years.

RLZ0073's picture

Then the skids need to stop complaining about it and their BM needs to stop texting about all her issues.

And yes, I kept everything after paying off all my bills once I sold my house and saved up. I’m debt free and have over $55k in the bank...

I’m hoping I can get in touch with my old therapist. I pay cash because he’s no longer part of my insurance plan... but he’s the only person who knows me.

Disneyfan's picture

"Their mother is the one who should step in..."

No, if they are being rude and disrespectful to him, he should get on their asses. If they are acting like fools in his home, he should address it directly. Based on the behaviors you described, they deserve to be yelled at.

Instead of putting the man down for having the balls to address negative behaviors, you (and your husband)should follow his lead

Rags's picture

You know where you stand on the relative scale of importance for this worthless POS waste of parental skin SO you have for some mysterious reason chosen as your fiance.

So, make a different choice. Please!

If not for your own sake... for your daughter's sake. Why would you force your own child into the presence of this shallow and polluted gene pool that is led by your fiance. :? :sick: