Your lack of planning is not my problem
Your lack of planning is not my problem. Repeat.
So the other day I tell DH I'm heading over to a friend's house to drop something off. I won't be long, but may stay for a quick chat (i.e. 20 - 30 min) but will be home in about and hour (to include drive time). No issues.
We have ONE car.
At my friend's place I leave my purse/phone in the car since it'll be a quick drop by. It is. I'm on my way home in about 20+ minutes. As I'm about 1/2 mile from the house DH calls me in a panic "Where are you! Why didn't you have your phone! You need to get here now! I need to pick up YSD!" WTF?
I pull up to the house and he's heading to the car - yelling at me that he needs to pick up YSD as she's "stranded" at the transit location and why did I take the car and he tried contacting me as soon as I left because HE forgot he needed to pick her up....wait a second DH....
1. I did NOT know she was coming today - it's not on the calendar, you did NOT tell me this, it's a TUESDAY, not her regular schedule. HOW am I supposed to magically know she's coming. He continues to tell me he told me - NO you did NOT.
2. DH, your first contact to me was 30 mintues after I left, I was already at my friends house. Why did I need my phone? It was a quick trip and I DID NOT KNOW you needed the car!
3. She is not "stranded" - it's a completely amazingly safe transit stop with lots of personnel there. It's a gorgeous day. She knows the area. She's 15 dammit! What about HER phone, does she know that you are late? FFS. BTW: at this point he's only 15 min late.
I ended up giving him the keys and not responding further. When he got home, I ignored everyone the rest of the night. He apologized but I just shrugged. Not taking it DH - totally unaccepatable behavior and if it happens again you go buy yourself car.
This is part of disengaging as far as I'm concerned - HE made the mistake and I don't compensate, I don't scheudle around what I am unaware of nor do I make it my emergency. It's up to him 100% to inform me of YSDs schedule, esp. if it's off her normal times. It's my car and i do what I want on my time. I do not apologize for something that was not my fault nor do I promise to make it better. I hold him accountable.