Some ideas on mild disengaging?
Hello. I am new here, and have been told I do too much for my SS, and that is why I am feeling the way I am. The best way I can describe it is "burnt out." While I do greatly love my FDH and SS, I feel like sometimes I am losing myself. Upon talking to my mom, she said that after my sister and I were born, she felt as though she was no longer herself, but mine and my sister's mother. And that's it. She told me that while it is important for SS to know I am a safe, dependable place, I don't have to exhaust myself trying to be something I will never be to him, and that's mom. It makes complete sense to me. I am always running in place and trying to please everyone, even though it is never been asked of me.
So, my question is how can I disengage without either of them feeling a sense of abaondonment from me? I don't want to exhaust myself so much on SS that I can't be the best mom possible to my future children.