Fell out of Disengagement- should I go back?
I have a SS12, sweet, caring, loving boy. The only issue I have is he chooses not to eat while he is at our house. Is it a power or control thing woth him? I cook, he doesn’t eat home cooked meals at BM. He only eats fast food and junk over there. So when he comes over here, he doesn’t eat. I went a period of time where I wouldn’t make him anything special, he would eat what I cooked for the family, and he wouldn’t eat at all. His choice. Then today, I made a huge mistake. My intention was to be nice and he told me he had a hotdog at his Moms for lunch before he came over to our house. So, I bought the crap hotdog he likes with crappy white hot dog buns and made it for lunch for him. No one else in the family eats that. It was only for him. What does he do- he eats the white bun and pushes the hotdog away from him and pours water over the hotdog on the plate. I say “what’s wrong” he said he wants it grilled and burnt- he wants it all black. What?!? I have never heard of wantjng a hotdog black burnt. Really?! So I ask my husband to turn on the grill and burn it. He refuses. Meanwhile my 3YOS is eating his lunch watching my SS12 not eat his lunch. I am fed up!! Not acceptable behavior. Especially after my husband said no to the grill he pours water on the hotdog. He is sent to his room. Now he WINS. He doesn’t have to eat the hotdog. He gets his way. I go out of my way and always he refuses to eat it. It seems so trivial, but it’s so aggravating to me. He chooses not to eat. Then he goes to BM and prolly eats 2 hamburgers from McDonalds because he didn’t eat all weekend at our house. Should I go back to being disengaged and not caring if he eats? Please help- I feel like I am going crazy.