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Not sure how this will turn out

takeachillpill's picture
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Hi everyone, I am new here, not even sure if this is the right forum but I could use some support.  It has been helpful to read everyone's posts here over the past couple of weeks and know that I am not alone in dealing with the crazy.  For background I am step mom to two girls (age10) and a boy (age 12).  DH and I have 50/50.

There HCBM recently moved about 90 minutes away and instead of filing a move away with the court she instead filed a restraining order against DH accusing him of abuse.  The RO was served the day after the new home closed in Feb 2021.  Of course, this dragged us in to court where she denied that she was moving away depsite closing on a home...she still  had home in our neighborhood.  So after minor's counsel, CPS, and I think one other professional interviewed all of the kids they found the abuse claims to be unfounced and the case was closed with prejudice, CO remains in place 50/50.  We had to file an order which the judge granted to not change the kids school district for the 2021 year which we were granted, but now the HCBM runs around to any professional who will listen and continues to lie and say that we are abusing the kids.  She accuses us of all manners of ridiculousness that I won't even list out.  We sometimes take them on an uphill hike that is a couple of miles long and when one complained about it, she banned it.  She had consistently nit picked us on TP about really minor stuff, but now sends upwards of 10 messages per day to DH continuing to acuse us and make a big deal about minor things.  I am not really sure what her angle is to keep accusing us, seems like she is still trying to build a case, but I have no idea how this will turn out. 

The court ordered therapy for the kids and all three had intakes.  For two of them the therapist said no follow up needed, and one got follow up so she could have a place to talk (the one that parrots BM), but no suspicions of abuse.  The MD notes from when she took them in to evaluate their "neck pain" from all of the beatings said in her note that when BM was in the room the kids said DH hit them, but when BM left the room they denied it.  HCBM is now demanding that we change health insurance so that she can take them to other therapist and doctors and spin more lies.  The problem with our current medical care is that the MD knows the kids, who have never had any complaints or problems until the year of the move.  In one therapist note, where the therapist said follow up not needed, you could see in the note when the therapist interviewed BM she lied and lied about how we abuse them psysically and verbally.  It is shameful.  Have any of you experienced anything like this?  Do you know what the angle could me to keep lying about us all of the time?  I appreciate you all reading this and any feedback you might have.   I also am not familiar with all of the abbreviations, I did my best.  If there is a resource where they are all listed, I would gladly take a look at it.  

takeachillpill's picture

HCBM recently sold house in local area and lives in the new location full time.  That was consistently denied to the court earlier this year when she said she had no intentions of moving away.

CastleJJ's picture

BM knows that if she gets caught for moving, she will be in trouble, so she is trying to get this abuse case to stick no matter what because she feels it is her only avenue to protect herself from trouble. 

Honestly, you need to secure the medical records, evidence that she sold her home, evidence that she is living in the new home, and other proof and take her to court for false allegations, an unlawful move, and harassment. Otherwise, this crap will continue. Also, get cameras for the home and keep them in common living spaces (i.e. kitchen, living room, play room, hallways, etc) and have them record when skids are there so you can turn over evidence proving no abuse to the courts if needed. It's just an added layer of protection for you guys. 

LittleCloud9's picture

Sadly the liars can often get away with making things up and just throwing mud to try and get what they want. Usually with little to no evidence to support the things they say.

Those who care about the truth and want defend themselves have to do far more work. Document everything, have witnesses or cameras around, keep copies of all med docs and such.... it's a ton of work just to show you did nothing wrong. Stupid system :( 

At least there is a record that she's made false claims before. Don't let her or the court forget that. Keep your guard up and always cover your butt 

 

Rags's picture

Time to start initiating contempt motions and false allegation, defamation, etc... suits against BM and tolerate no crap from her.  Bare her ass in court on her hidden move and tie her lies to her move as an attempt to take the kids from their father.

Keep riding her hard and putting her up wet in the whole court process and bring a never ending state of abject misery down on her like flies on the shit that she is. Until she either knocks her crap off or the kids age out from under the CO and DH can have a relationship with them completely separate from their BM.

smh

takeachillpill's picture

Thank you for the comments everyone.