Throw a ball around.
Play with building blocks.
Read with/to him.
Sit with him to watch cartoons when that's what he's doing.
Let him "help" when you're shoveling, raking leaves or mowing the lawn.
I think the best thing you can do to get close to this little guy is to respect his Mum. Lead by example and show him how much you love her. If he knows that you are nice to his Mum he will be nice to you. The child will be more open to doing things with you and feeling safe. Try doing thing that include him. He is at a age that you can form a good relationship. Good Luck. All kids love to build with Legos. You can build things with him. Make something together.
i respect his mum and when my intention is to get close to him and talk with him he starts complaining that i am bothering him and his mum says sometimes stop botherkng him. His mum defends him when he líes. His intention is to get into discussions between his mum and me. He is jealous of me with his mum and if we are walking his intention is to distance me from his mum.
Does he like cars? I'd say HotWheels cars and stuff like that.
Sports? Pick something you both can enjoy together.
Any allergies or other issues, you might need to plan around that...
Remember your not there to replace his bio dad no matter what the circumstance bm told you. Let mom be mom, that means she corrects, she does homework, she disciplines...
She arranges AND does transportation to from anywhere the child is or will go, she cares for her child in every way NOT YOU.
IF you raise your hand to offer your services except for emergencies you will sorta be expected to pitch in for most things.
I am more than glad to express that the stepchild And mum have made a coalition against me. I feel that my wife commits emotional incest with her son who is my stepson. I feel like my stepson is the surrogate spouse. My wife doesn't set boundaries with her stepson when he disrespects me. My wife also disrespect s me in front of the stepson. My wife lets my stepson operate with impunity. She doesn't discipline him when he lies or misbehaves.
Keep in mind that the key element of your title is PARENT. Step is just the prefix.
Be his parent. Don't try to be his buddy.
Be active in his life.
Show some interest in what he is interested in. For me this was seemingly impossible as I am not a gamer and my SKid was and remains far more interested in someone else's imaginary world than reality or in exercising his own imagination. How I overcame this was to turn the real world into his game world. We would go on hikes and I would set up the journey by pointing out good ambush sites, castles, Ork holes, etc, etc, etc and whatever other crap I could make up that seemed in line with his games and fantasy novels.... To this day he can't recall a single notable day gaming but he can tell in detail about our hikes, camping trips, etc, etc, etc..... I also coached his sports teams, taught him to ride his bike, to read, to tie his shoes, etc, etc, etc... in partnership with my bride of course.
Never forget that his mom is your wife and as my own dad put it..."Never put me in the position of having to interject myself into a situation where you are disrespectful to my wife." That dad's wife is also my mom was not the point.
I used the same message with my SS. His mom and I met when he was 15mos old and married the week before he turned 2yo. Our son is now 25. He asked me to adopt him when he was 22. He has been in the USAF for nearly 7 years and is performing well as a viable adult in his own right.
Stick with the basics and you and your SS will be close. One key foundational element of our success is that my wife and I worked out very early in our marriage that we are equity life partners and that makes us both equity parents to any children in our marital home regardless of kid biology. It turned out that SS-25 is our only child but the basic premise remained key to our blended family life.
The stepsons intention is to bully our bio son. My intention is to protect my bio son from my stepson. My stepsons intention to my bioson is to call him names and not lend him his toys.
I am more than glad to express my intention that sometimes it seems like the coalition of my wife and her stepson against me and my bioson.
Find an activity both boys like then do that with both.(hiking.swimming.laying on the grass)
Assign tasks where they can help eachother.
Ex. Boys carry these bags to the house.
Ss get the bowls. BS get the cereal.
Why does Ss have to lend bioson his toys?
Does bioson ask to borrow the toy first? Or does he just expect Ss to automatically share?
It might be time to start teaching principles of ownership to. Both boys
Such as"this toy belongs to Ss.you have to ask to borrow it first."
"Ss can i borrow that toy?"- bioson
"No play with your toy!!"-ss
Bioson starts crying bc ss wont share
You take bioson aside and tell him he did really well. Then let him play with his own toy.
Disclaimer: I disagree with parents forcing children to share as it contributes to an attitude of entitlement.
Just play with him. Throw a
Just play with him.
Throw a ball around.
Play with building blocks.
Read with/to him.
Sit with him to watch cartoons when that's what he's doing.
Let him "help" when you're shoveling, raking leaves or mowing the lawn.
I think the best thing you
I think the best thing you can do to get close to this little guy is to respect his Mum. Lead by example and show him how much you love her. If he knows that you are nice to his Mum he will be nice to you. The child will be more open to doing things with you and feeling safe. Try doing thing that include him. He is at a age that you can form a good relationship. Good Luck. All kids love to build with Legos. You can build things with him. Make something together.
i respect his mum and when my
i respect his mum and when my intention is to get close to him and talk with him he starts complaining that i am bothering him and his mum says sometimes stop botherkng him. His mum defends him when he líes. His intention is to get into discussions between his mum and me. He is jealous of me with his mum and if we are walking his intention is to distance me from his mum.
5 is a good age! Lucky
5 is a good age! Lucky SDad!
Does he like cars? I'd say HotWheels cars and stuff like that.
Sports? Pick something you both can enjoy together.
Any allergies or other issues, you might need to plan around that...
Secret said what I was
Secret said what I was thinking.
Just be yourself. Little boys are super easy.
Remember your not there to replace his bio dad no matter what the circumstance bm told you. Let mom be mom, that means she corrects, she does homework, she disciplines...
She arranges AND does transportation to from anywhere the child is or will go, she cares for her child in every way NOT YOU.
IF you raise your hand to offer your services except for emergencies you will sorta be expected to pitch in for most things.
Welcome to step talk....just be yourself and kind
I am more than glad to
I am more than glad to express that the stepchild And mum have made a coalition against me. I feel that my wife commits emotional incest with her son who is my stepson. I feel like my stepson is the surrogate spouse. My wife doesn't set boundaries with her stepson when he disrespects me. My wife also disrespect s me in front of the stepson. My wife lets my stepson operate with impunity. She doesn't discipline him when he lies or misbehaves.
Keep in mind that the key
Keep in mind that the key element of your title is PARENT. Step is just the prefix.
Be his parent. Don't try to be his buddy.
Be active in his life.
Show some interest in what he is interested in. For me this was seemingly impossible as I am not a gamer and my SKid was and remains far more interested in someone else's imaginary world than reality or in exercising his own imagination. How I overcame this was to turn the real world into his game world. We would go on hikes and I would set up the journey by pointing out good ambush sites, castles, Ork holes, etc, etc, etc and whatever other crap I could make up that seemed in line with his games and fantasy novels.... To this day he can't recall a single notable day gaming but he can tell in detail about our hikes, camping trips, etc, etc, etc..... I also coached his sports teams, taught him to ride his bike, to read, to tie his shoes, etc, etc, etc... in partnership with my bride of course.
Never forget that his mom is your wife and as my own dad put it..."Never put me in the position of having to interject myself into a situation where you are disrespectful to my wife." That dad's wife is also my mom was not the point.
I used the same message with my SS. His mom and I met when he was 15mos old and married the week before he turned 2yo. Our son is now 25. He asked me to adopt him when he was 22. He has been in the USAF for nearly 7 years and is performing well as a viable adult in his own right.
Stick with the basics and you and your SS will be close. One key foundational element of our success is that my wife and I worked out very early in our marriage that we are equity life partners and that makes us both equity parents to any children in our marital home regardless of kid biology. It turned out that SS-25 is our only child but the basic premise remained key to our blended family life.
Good luck.
you can be his role model and
you can be his role model and do things with him, playing ball or what ever, but be careful not to cross the line from authority figure to buddy,
Also never say anything bad about his father and make sure your wife does not say anything bad about her Ex in front of the critter....
Then simply treat him like you would treat your sister/brother's kid that visits..
5yo is an awesome
5yo is an awesome age-lucky!
Just participate in what he does
Include him in things you do he shows an interest in!
Good luck!
The stepsons intention is to
The stepsons intention is to bully our bio son. My intention is to protect my bio son from my stepson. My stepsons intention to my bioson is to call him names and not lend him his toys.
I am more than glad to express my intention that sometimes it seems like the coalition of my wife and her stepson against me and my bioson.
Find an activity both boys
Find an activity both boys like then do that with both.(hiking.swimming.laying on the grass)
Assign tasks where they can help eachother.
Ex. Boys carry these bags to the house.
Ss get the bowls. BS get the cereal.
Why does Ss have to lend bioson his toys?
Does bioson ask to borrow the toy first? Or does he just expect Ss to automatically share?
It might be time to start teaching principles of ownership to. Both boys
Such as"this toy belongs to Ss.you have to ask to borrow it first."
"Ss can i borrow that toy?"- bioson
"No play with your toy!!"-ss
Bioson starts crying bc ss wont share
You take bioson aside and tell him he did really well. Then let him play with his own toy.
Disclaimer: I disagree with parents forcing children to share as it contributes to an attitude of entitlement.