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Step kids mother and her evil doings.

april_14870's picture

I'm a new step parent to my Husbands 2 daughters. We have always had problems with their mother, but since they quit going to counseling, things have gotten real bad. We have them every other wknd. Well their mother is a fan of MYSPACE, and usually everything that goes on she makes sure she posts, we do live in the same town and have to deal with the same ppl. Sometimes she gets real bad and uses our names and posts some very serious lies. She has this BF who she pushes to be the girls' make believe father and puts down my husband something fierce, mind you her BF does not work or see his own kids who live in the same town.

Anyway, we usually just put up with her crap and brush it under the carpet until this wknd. the girls wanted my husband to give up part of his wknd so they could go to some annual festival with their mother and her BF. My husband said NO. That started world war 5 - in our household. They went home and told their mother. Well then she started to post some things online saying my husband was drinking and driving around with the kids in the car(NEVER HAPPENED) and leaves them in the house with me and I'm really mean to them. Mind you, they are 11, and he only goes outside to the garage and they are free to go in and out at their own will. I have been trying to figure out what I have done thats mean to them and how to approach this to them. If I come home and I'm grumpy, I usually keep to myself. I don't ignore them or say anything to them thats nasty, and its only been a couple of times in the last year that I have had that bad of day. I understand that their mother grills them and shows them that when you don't get your way its ok to act out in any way shape of form.

I finally had enough and I called their mother. I simply asked her that if she felt that we had done something so serious as to drink and drive with the kids, why she didn't call someone immediatly. I don't care when I found out about it, If I felt that were true and my kids were as scared as she had posted, I would be making sure it didn't happen again. she told me that I was harrassing her, HA, I have so many things that I have saved and printed that she has posted about myself and my husband that are very horrible. Even threatening me with violence one time because I had felt one of the girls had taken something from the kitchen without asking so I simply said to them that if they wanted something all they had to do was ask and it was not nice to just take. I never yelled or made it a big deal, but.....

I refuse to be afraid of 2 11yr olds going back to their mom and trying to get me and my husband in trouble everytime things don't go their way. But I would like to sit them down and talk to them about this, but I don't know if it will do any good or just give them a reason to go back to their mother and give her more fuel. I wish my husband would petition the court to go back to counseling. Any ideas?

Learning the Ropes's picture

I mean, I know it is, but not sure what the guidelines are on proving it or any of that. I know it's slander if it's spoken, can't remember the term for printed lies, maybe that's the one that's slander. If this were to ever cause him problems with work or anything like that, he has grounds for a defamation of character lawsuit! I know, at the very least, a judge would chew her butt to shreds in a family court for doing something like that! In my order, there is specific wording that says neither parent is permitted to speak negatively about the other parent in front of the child. Posting in a public place like MySpace is without question in the parameters of that. Have your DH check his papers. If there's something like that in there, it's contempt of court, and she'll be at the very least fined, possibly even put in jail if it's repeated/bad enough. At least in SC, that's how it would work.

Smart that you've printed everything, too. Hold onto those copies! They ARE admissable in court! When she posts to MySpace, she has full knowledge that anyone can read it, including a judge, and she can be held legally responsible for her actions. It's a stupid as putting a picture of yourself doing something illegal in the local newspaper!

"Be careful who you have babies with..." --BitchBitchBarbie, 2009

april_14870's picture

Yes it is in his order that neither parent can say anything negative about the other. Like I said, she has gotten real bad now that they don't see a counselor anymore. Thanks for the response. We still don't know how to address this with the kids. I always feel like I'm walking on eggshells with them. They are real nice here infront of us but as soon as they go home.... the war is on. Their mother is one of those ppl who can be so sweet to your face and lie so bad. She does not care about anything she does or says. Very frustrating