So i'll give a little background first as my situation is kinda strange for this world lol. Me and my husband have 2 kids, my stepdaughter(SD) whos 4 and my biological son whos 10months. We have full custody of my SD with the BM having visitation. We used to be on a different schedule with BM seeing my SD every tuesday and thursday and every other weekend, now she rarely EVER sees her and when she does its an hour here an hour there random. We've tried talking to her to get her on a regular visitation schedule but no luck, shes too busy getting drunk to see her daughter. Nevertheless we do have a decent relationship with her, and as a person shes great, just not as a mother. We know that this is part of the problem with my SD but theres nothing we can do to fix it. We do not have the money to go to court and take visitation completely away from her and i dont think she'd give it up voluntarily. The problem we're having is that my SD has a horrible attitude and just does NOT want to be good at all. Recently shes been acting like her brother. Now my son has a thing with cords, he loves to put them in his mouth and try to chew on them despite us continually taking it away from him and all that. Now my SD is also chewing on cords...she wont eat, she wont listen, she throws herself on the ground pouting to the point weve actually had to take her to the ER because she sprained her wrist doing that. We've tried ignoring it but then she starts doing stuff that will hurt her even more. She acts EXACTLY like a teenaager, never thinking were right always thinking she knows everything. We've tried EVERYTHING, shes spoken to a therapist but doesnt act a THING like this when shes around anyone other than us and BM. I just dont know what to do, its gotten to the point i just dont want to see her because its never pleasant, I TRY to do stuff with her I TRY to have some quality time with her and have a nice night with her, it just NEVER seems to work out because she starts acting up. I'm so freaking tired of it.
Plleeeaaassseee someone give me an idea because me and my husband are completely out of ideas.