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Question: What are Stepkids like as teens?

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture


I read many horror stories and I wonder what SS8 will turn in to in the coming years. He is still young and his BM did remarry. I see many of these boys though, and as they get older and older, they begin to despise their dads and stepmoms. Are their any "veteran" SM's here with experience? My 2 kids are 1 and the eldest is on their own already.

Thx in advance! Wink

justanothergurlNJ's picture

I don't know since skids are 5 and 7. I do know what teenagres are like I have 1 and a tween. So I could venture a guess, take YOUR teenage and times that by 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000 and that's is what you get!

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture

LOL My eldest is already on their own. SS8 is nothing like my own though. I've been through the teen thing already. I'm just wondering more on the dad/son relationships. I can see SS8 getting older and despising his dad, already.

guiltystepmom's picture

They r pretentious, they think u owe them everything...and they r master manipulators!!!!!!!!!!!!! and thats when u see that they r really their mothers kid!!!!!

guiltystepmom's picture


stormabruin's picture

They're assholes, like normal teens are to their parents, with a little more emphasis on the "ass" part when it comes to you because you're not their "real" parent.

Still Have Hope's picture

Just a quick list of some of my adventures with 2 teen skids:

- Stole money, liquor, clothes, toiletries & food from our home.
- Falsified report cards & hid letters from school officials.
- Expelled for selling drugs on school grounds.
- Snuck out of the house in the middle of the night to meet up with friends many times.
- Stole prescription medicines from our medicine chest.
- Stole expensive lingerie from my closet more than once.
- Stole my grandmother's wedding rings that I inherited when she died.
- Destroyed BD's room when I took BD on a weekend away to visit my oldest school friend.
- Teased BD6 into hysterical tears on Christmas Day for getting a doll baby from Santa.
- Rude to the point of embarrassment to relatives, friends and colleagues when we entertained at our home.
- Stole from grandparents when we took them to visit for vacation.
- Charged over $400 to room service on another vacation.
- Both have attempted suicide then laughed about how gullible we were to take them seriously and have then hospitalized.
- Totaled 2 of our cars.
- Had me drive an hour in a snowstorm to pick her up off the side of the highway where boyfriend left her only refuse to get in the car when I said I was taking to my house not said boyfriend's.
- Expelled from college and hospitalized for alcohol poisoning after binge drinking.
- Both treated for STD's after promiscuous activities.
- Used graduation gift $$ to pay for tattoos instead of college expenses.
- Both refused to get part time jobs to help pay for living expenses and college costs after turning 18 and graduating.

I am sure I could think of more but I am tired of typing. The worst thing about all this is that now whatever they do seems great in comparison to past behavior. So I constantly have to hear "Skids are doing so much better than before."

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture


It doesn't look pretty at all! I'm @ work and am not ignoring anyone, BTW. I get off @ 3 today.

I'm sure it will get worse. SS8 is already pretty much demanding special gifts, meals, etc. not even thinki9ng of me or BS1. I do worry about how SS8 will feel about BS1, gravely.

anyone else here with BK's and SK's? "half-siblings"

SMKarma's picture

out my 6 skids (all adults now; been 20 plus yrs)
One is the best, we have a great relationship. (different BM)
the other 5.. well lets just say they refuse to talk to us. That is what PA will get ya.

ownedbypedro's picture

* STINK to high heaven. REFUSE to use toilet paper, soap, shampoo, toothpaste.

* Eat an entire box of cereal in a MIXING BOWL every morning before anyone else is up. THEN expect you to cook them a gourmet breakfast.

* Tell your 4 and 6 year old children that there is no such thing as Santa Claus.


* Act like an ASSHOLE whenever you have a babysitter in for your own children. Result is you can't get a decent babysitter to save your very life because word spreads fast among babysitters "do NOT babysit for these people, there is an ASSHOLE living there."

* Whine to its mommy because you won't let HIM babysit your children. OH HELL NO!!!

* Steal your children's toys and break them.

* NEVER. NEVER. do a stitch of homework. NEVER.

* Go to bed when it wants to, get up when it wants to, go to school when it wants to, come home when it wants to. Tell daddy I'm not feeding him (because he was NEVER home at supper time).

* Tell daddy I am shrinking his jeans when I do laundry. UMMMMMMMM...EARTH TO ASSWIPE, you are spending all your paper route money on CANDY and SODA and you are getting FATTER...I am NOT shrinking you goddamn jeans!!

* Get kicked out of a couple of "informal foster homes" - dh can NOT PAY anyone to take this kid back who has already had him and said ENOUGH. (mind you, his mother was willing and able to take him back but skid wanted to stay where him's dadddddddyyyyy was so he could MANIPULATE). This included a tenant of ours who was offered FREE RENT PLUS $500 a MONTH to take him back and she said NO DAMN WAY!!!

* Decide he is too lazy to deliver his after school paper route and throw all newspapers into the river. Meanwhile, my phone is ringing off the hook with little old ladies asking ME where their newspaper is. "Honey, I don't know, I am here with a newborn and a toddler and I could give a shit..."

* Make remarks MULTIPLE TIMES about how easy it would be to KILL your baby. And dh defending him by saying "he only means that the baby is so small..." THE ASSHOLE DOESN'T FALL FAR FROM THE TREE.

* Constantly try to isolate dh from me and the babies. "Dad, let's you and me go bowling", "dad, let's you and me...blah blah blah..."

* Refuse to go to bed until dh and I went to bed.

* Leave SHARP KNIVES, SCISSORS, ETC. where little dd could get her hands on them.

* Hide his retianer so he didn't have to wear it and then accuse dd age 2 of taking it. PUKE!

* Sleep in his clothes and then wear them the next day. And the NEXT day.

* NEVER put any underwear in the dirty laundry. Dh defending, saying skid was embarrassed for me to wash his underwear. Well...maybe if he USED toilet paper or CHANGED them once in awhile...

* Attempting to call his mother OUT OF STATE on the phone and getting someone relatively LOCAL and REFUSING to accept that his mom wasn't there...kept saying "but I want to talk to my mom" HE WAS FIFTEEN.

* Being told to be in the house by "a quarter after four." Comes in at 4:25. Me: skid, you are late. Skid: "no I'm not" Me: YES, you are. Skid: No I'm not, it's 4:25. Me: and I told you 4:15. Skid: No, you told me a quarter afer and 4:25 is a quarter after. Me: how do you figure? Skid: because a quarter is 25 cents. Again, he was FIFTEEN.

This is only 1/100th of the list - I PROMISE.

Willow2010's picture

SS was about 8 when I met DH…DH got him A LOT. Almost half time. Then I came into picture and BM flipped and started keeping SS away from DH.
That lasted a few years. I really did not even think that SS would be part of DH’s life when he grew up.

Then when SS turned about 12ish..he wanted to stay with DH more and more. Then he moved in at 16.

Now during all of this time, SS….
Got Suspended from school at least 3 times that I know of.
Was in at least 20 fights that I know of.
Was in trouble for sexual harassment in the 7th grade. Suspended
In trouble for stealing from the teachers lounge.
In trouble for sniffing glue.
ECT…ECT…ECT..and that does not count all of the crap I blocked out and can’t remember.
That is why I would not live with or marry my DH until SS was much older.

Willow2010's picture

My 2 kids are 1 and the eldest is on their own already.
Oh crap..I just noticed this!! Thats awesome.

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture

I'm doing it all here. SM, BM, and soon-to-be grandma, courtesy of eldest. I've been around the block in my short life.

This is NOT easy. All I can say is there are some really immature "parents" out there. I make myself laugh, a lot. Wink

Thank you guys but OMG to the stories I am reading.

Unfreakingreal's picture

My SS was 8 when I met DH. He is now almost 20. He is actually a really good kid with as many faults as ALL kids/skids. He is entitled, lazy, messy. But he is very respectful of both me and his dad. He also is VERY close to my Bio son. So for that reason more than anything else, I have really grown to love him. Do I need to nag at him? YES, all the time. Has he EVER talked back or challenged me? Nope. Thank God and good for him because it wouldn't be pretty. SD is another story. She is going to be 12 and I already am seeing massive warning signals as far as she is concerned. She does respect me because she knows I'll blow a gasket if she doesn't but I can see that she is going to be a bitch on wheels. It doesn't help that she not only looks exactly like her monkeymom but she also has her attitude and personality. Which is very unfortunate for both ME and SD.

Unfreakingreal's picture

Butterfly, my son is 14. And SS19 and he are closer than he is to his bio older brothers. It's very interesting.

Butterflykissesandlicks's picture

I am sure. My youngest just turned a year old, my oldest is twenty-one and expecting his own in a couple of months and SS is eight years old.

I will have a total of 4 boys in my life. 3 boys and one grandson, on the way. BS1 will be an uncle at a 1 1/2... oh boy. (pun intended).

For some reason, my BS1 is closer to my eldest BS, even though he never sees him much. Not a BM thing here but they are a lot more alike.

SS8 does not seem to care much for BS1. A shame. If his BM would just stay out of many things, SS8 would be much more cozy.

Unfreakingreal's picture

Oh welcome to my world of men! I have 3 Bio Sons, 27, 23, 14. And my 19 y/o SS. Living with us are SS19, BS14 and BS23. Boys, IMO, are much easier than girls. I only assume that, because I don't have any daughters but my SD is a handful so I kinda figure they're all little demons like her. Our BM hates that SS and BS get along so well. I have heard her repeatedly tell SS that BS is NOT his brother and to stop calling him that. They BOTH refer to each other as brothers, even though they are not related at all. I think it's nice.

NCMilGal's picture

SD16 was 10 when I met her. She was never really an asshole (she idolized her daddy) she was just a selfish opportunist and a little bit of a BM-clone. As she turned into a teenager, she has REALLY rebelled against BM, and grown incredibly close to DH and me.

She's my little flaming liberal - highly vocal about gay rights and race relations and feminism; BM is an extremely bigoted fundamentalist "Christian" who casually tosses out racial epithets and sneers about "those gays" so that puts SD16 and BM against each other a lot.