I was wondering if anyone feels the same way or has been through my situation and can offer some guidance. I have a BD14 and BS11 who are the best kids in the world. Sure the BD is working through the hormones and the BS has been going to school with his BF and is failing 5th grade. But I have to say I have raised my kids with a kind and understanding hand and I hope they in turn will be that way as then grow older too. I am also engaged and we have been living with each other for over 5 years so for simplicity sake his kids will get the step status. That being said, I have SD11 and SD9. These two are extremely brilliant and when I say that I mean they are in the 98% range for the US. They also have BPsthat are extremely intelligent and successful. Myself and my kids are along the normal lines of intelligence and I am very happy with what I do so I would consider myself successful even if it is not with income per say. I am finding that some people (not all) who are very intelligent are masters at manipulation. I am also finding that the SD11 has picked up the manipulation trait and is mastering it against me and my two kids, even her friends and of course dad and it is actually a little scary how well she does it at times. ***How do I protect myself from that way of acting and more importantly, how can I protect my kids so they don’t feel less than how wonderful they are.*** The SD9 sees how much attention and lack of helping around the house benefits her sister and is starting down the same path, which really is sad because the SD9 has a wonderful caring streak in her. To top this all off, their BM left both of them with us for a year to go back to school for continued education (she is currently a doctor of medicine) so the girls have abandonment issues which manifest with sever moodiness and ill temper which the dad ignores because that is easier than getting them help to make it through this event, teaching them how to deal so everyone else doesn’t have to suffer and guiding them so they can have normal friendships (they usually seek out kids that are weaker and then get into fights when the kids stand up for themselves).

Of course, my relationship with my fiancé has some ugly issues (nothing physically abusive) like selfishness, money, vacations, lack of respect and for me, growing hatred but that is for another day…